Overview of the Document - Getting Ready for University - Term Paper Example

Critique of Getting Ready for University Written for: Dr. Ian Gould Chancellor, University of South Australia (UNISA) Written by …………………… Senior writer, Crisp Writers Bay Ltd 31 October 2014 Abstract In documenting a critical evaluation of a university brochure, Getting Ready for University, a number of technical issues regarding its philosophy, contents and format have been raised. The Chancellor of University of South Australia (UNISA), Dr. Ian Gould, commissioned the review of this brochure so that its technical strengths and weaknesses can be pointed out and recommendations for its improvement made. The end users of this brochure are freshman university students upon admission. This technical report has five main parts: Introduction, Technical Issues, Conclusion and Recommendations. The introduction gives a brief overview of the document under review, Getting Ready for University. The technical issues evaluated here are threefold: Meta-issues, Macro-issues and Micro-issues as outlined by Trigg, Jerosom and Marckwick (2004). Valuable reference has been made to the Style Manual (2002) among other technical writing resources. The conclusion puts the specific issues raised by the report in perspective while the recommendations present what needs to be done while redrafting the document in order to improve its suitability and effectiveness. Table of Contents Abstract 2 1.Introduction 3 2.Document Overview 3 2.1 Document type 3 2.2 Authors 4 2.3 Purpose 4 3 Technical Evaluation 4 3.1 Meta-issues 5 3.1.1 Expectations 5 3.1.2 Audience 5 3.1.3 Assumptions 5 3.1.4 Tone 5 3.1.5 Sources of data 6 3.2 Macro-issues 6 3.2.4 Form 6 3.2.1 Layout 7 3.2.2 Pictures 8 3.2.3 Structure 8 3.2.4 Graphics 8 3.2.4 Language 9 3.2.5 Physical appearance 9 3.3 Micro-issues 10 3.3.1 Grammar 10 3.3.3 Punctuation 11 4 Conclusion 11 5 Recommendations 12 5.1 Meta-issues 12 5.2 Macro-issues 13 5.3 Micro-issues 13 6 References 13 7. Appendix A – Getting Ready for University 14 8. Appendix B: Getting Ready for University (with changes) 15 1. Introduction When students are newly admitted into a university, they need proper and adequate orientation on the university academic and social life. One of the ways in which freshmen at UNISA are orientated is by taking them through an informative brochure, Getting Ready for University. The basis for critiquing this brochure is to ascertain whether or not it meets the expectations of the authors by, one, making the correct assumptions and promoting sound values (meta-issues) ; two, by following the conventions for writing and formatting brochures (macro-issues); and, lastly, by communicating effectively through good grammar usage, accurate spelling and correct punctuation (micro-issues). Once these technical aspects of the document have been exhaustively addressed, a summary of the major weaknesses of arising from the evaluation is crafted in the conclusion section. Recommendations for each of weaknesses raised are outlined in the last section of this report. The writing of this report was sanctioned by Dr. Ian Gould, the Chancellor of University of South Australia (UNISA). 2. Document Overview 2.1 Document type What is Getting Ready for University? This is a two-page information brochure for newly admitted university students. Printed on both sides of a paper, this brochure is a classic tri-fold document. 2.2 Authors The contributors of information in this document are students and staff at three universities in southern Australia: University of Adelaide, Finders University and UNISA. The contents of this brochure are based on the expectations and experiences of the contributors. 2.3 Purpose From its sub-title “What you need to know”, this brochure is meant to give the freshmen important hands-on advice on what goes on at the university. The advice is given on the basis of research findings from university students. 3 Technical Evaluation Trigg, Jeromson and Markwick (2004) propose three levels for technical appraisal of a document. The first level, the Meta-issues, addresses matters external to the document. These include authorship, intended audience, the purpose of the text and its socio-cultural suitability. The second level deals with Macro-issues. The contents of the document and how it is formatted form the basis of evaluation at this level. Reference is also made to the genre-specific conventions – in this case, brochure writing. The last level, Micro-issues, focuses on the finer-grained specifics of a text like grammatical structures, punctuation and mechanics. Details for each level of analysis are given in the subsequent sub-sections. 3.1 Meta-issues 3.1.1 Expectations The title of the brochure has been narrowed down to purpose (getting ready) and subject (for university). Nevertheless, this title raises issues the document does not address. There is nothing in the title to suggest that financial and technological preparedness will not be addressed. 3.1.2 Audience The audience of this brochure is the university students in three different universities. It is inaccurate to assume that the expectations and experiences in three different universities will be the same. 3.1.3 Assumptions Two of the assumptions made by the authors of this brochure are ridiculous. One, that the research findings among the previous cohorts of students are applicable to all new students. Two, the authors assume that all students require 40 hours for full time study per week. These two assumptions take individual differences for granted. 3.1.4 Tone The tone of the brochure is overbearing and condescending. Constructions like “Don’t…”, “It is not expected that you…” and “What does this mean for you?” are quite demeaning to the students. This tone may cause resistance especially from the Year 12 graduates who would want to be looked at as young adults and not children anymore. 3.1.5 Sources of data The sources of data in the brochure are university staff and students on campus and none from Grade 12 graduates waiting to join university yet this brochure is meant for the latter. This brings about a feeling of exclusion. 3.2 Macro-issues The genre related aspects of the document in terms of form and content were critically evaluated. The appraisal of document’s layout, pictures, structure, form and language raised matters discussed below. 3.2.4 Form The contents in the brochure are presented in several forms namely stories, quotations, question-and-answer and note-form. 3.2.4.1 The Stories There are two Student Stories in the brochure. While the fast one is appropriate, the second story is unnecessarily long and this reduces its readability. Furthermore, this second narrative is more moralizing and preaching instead of sharing experiences. 3.2.4.2 Quotations Parts of the brochure are verbatim quotations students interviewed. Of the five verbatim quotes used, three are too long for this type of document. This reduces their chances of being read to the end. 3.2.4.3 Question-answer format On the second face of the brochure, there is a question and answer section for each topic discussed. The use of this question-answer format is effective in brochures but in this particular brochure, one question – what does this mean for you? – is used throughout. This causes repetitive monotony and makes the presentation mechanical hence it diminishes its communicative effect. 3.2.4.4 Notes The notes in this document are too technical for the level of the intended audience (Grade 12 graduates). They are overloaded with figures whereby half of the notes obtain statistical data. Though such data are good for credibility issues, they should be sparingly used in general public documents. 3.2.1 Layout Layout refers to placement of the visual and the textual elements of a document (Style Manual, 2002). The document Getting ready for University takes a classic tri-fold layout with the external folds having the title page, contact info and the students’ stories. The inner folds present the brochure major arguments. The main weakness of layout lies on the external pages. On the title page, there is no information on who the source institution is; neither is its logo displayed as is the convention with brochures (Parker, 2006). The logo and the title of the body sponsoring this publication – the Australian Government Office for Learning and Teaching – are obscurely placed at the very end of the brochure. Secondly, the date of publication is completely missing in the document. These two anomalies greatly impair the communicative forcefulness and authoritativeness of the brochure. 3.2.2 Pictures Nothing passes a message as effectively as pictures. The brochure under review has three pictures: one on the external fold and two on the internal folds. An inappropriate picture was chosen for the last in-fold page. The smiling female student is pictured in a classroom is looking at the opposite direction from where the teacher stands. The readers of this brochure can easily construe that an ideal student in university does the opposite of the norm. 3.2.3 Structure The order and manner of presenting information in a document is its structure. Lannon (2000) argues that organizing material in a logical sequence enhances its comprehension and memorability. The brochure at hand presents statistical evidence and then explains what it means for the new student. This, though commendable, is not consistent. Some statistics still appear in the implications section (see the last sub-topic). The objects on the title page are also improperly placed as far as hierarchical arrangement of elements is concerned (Bateman & Delin 2001). The acknowledgement, “An initiative of the …” is placed as if it is part of the title when it is not should not be. This last part should have been placed at the bottom of the page. 3.2.4 Graphics It has been noted that graphics, as visual aids, increases the visual appeal and communicates more effectively than prose (Anderson, 2011). The brochure, Getting Ready for University, does not benefit from advantages of graphical design as outlined by Waller (1987). Some information in the internal middle page should have been graphically presented to improve efficiency and break monotony of prose. 3.2.4 Language Language is one of the most important macro-issues in a document. It is the basic means of communication for any channel. Language choices reveal a lot about the attitude and tone of the author (Anderson, 2011). The language in the brochure is accessible to the target audience but more needs to be done in using language resources that would make give the document a more persuasive and a less condescending tone. Saying, for instance, that 75% of freshmen have unrealistic expectations is detrimental to persuasion. 3.2.5 Physical appearance The physical outlook of a document controls its formality levels, tone and visual appeal. Sizing, colour and font of this brochure have been critically analyzed with regard to their appropriateness and messages conveyed. 3.2.5.1 Sizing The designers of this brochure used uniform size of letters when giving the details under all sub-sections. Sizing plays a crucial role in emphasizing and highlighting the most important information. This means that the section “What this means for you” should have been made to stand out through sizing, graphics or colour. 3.2.5.2 Colour The background colour and letter colouring are effective in improving the visual appeal of a document (Gorn, Chattopadhyay, Yi, & Dahl 1997). While this brochure effectively uses background colours on its external folds, the internal pages are dull due to the predominant white background. As suggested in the previous sub-section, the most important sub-part should be highlighted through background colour. 3.2.5.3 Font The Style Manual (2002) suggests that some fonts appear more persuasive and formal than others. In the internal pages of Getting Ready for University, the same font, Arial, has been used for the headings and the body. The verbatim quotes are the most outstanding as they have been done in Arial Black. The headings and the action part (What does this mean for you?) should have been given more prominent fonts like Britannic Bold and Arial Black respectively. The verbatim quotations only needed to be highlighted by italicized bolded Calibri. 3.3 Micro-issues Trigg et al. (2004) define micro-issues as the finer-grained details of a written matter. They include grammar, spelling and punctuation. A review of each of two of these aspects in Getting Ready for University is presented below. 3.3.1 Grammar Good grammar enhances a document’s credibility and facilitates its comprehension. The title, Getting ready for University, blatantly contravenes the conventions for titling. It is inconsistent in its use of capitalization. Another problem of capitalization is on the last internal fold in which the word ‘Orientation’ is capitalized without proper syntactic or semantic justification. Secondly, it is curious that 3 out 4 students’ verbatim quotations are in passive voice. The Style Manual (2002) highly recommends the use of active voice more than the passive. The brochure does the opposite and this greatly hampers its effectiveness. Thirdly, in the body of brochure, several sentences begin with numerals (70%, or 80%) instead of words, which should not be the case according to Plonsky (2006). Thirdly, preference for the use of the symbol “&” to the formal word “and” renders the document casual. The authors are inconsistent in the use of “&” and “and” which could be confusing to the reader. Finally, some grammatical choices like the contracted forms and abbreviations such as “doesn’t” and “e.g.” are not recommended for formal communications such as this brochure (Hardwick 2006). Choosing “over the long run” instead of “in the long run” also renders the document’s grammatical accurateness questionable. 3.3.3 Punctuation A properly punctuated document is easy to read and to follow. One glaring example of punctuation errors in this document is found in the student stories: “…between work/uni/social life, however this much easier said than done.” Forward slashes are used to represent “or”. In this example; therefore, it would read “between work or uni or social life” which is inaccurate. Preceding “however” with a comma is also wrong. It is usually preceded with a semi-colon and followed by a comma if proper punctuation rules are to be adhered to. The “eg” as used in the brochure is also wrongly punctuated – it should read “e.g.” 4 Conclusion The brochure, Getting Ready for University, is a well-intentioned and well-researched document for inducting newly admitted university students. However, its effectiveness is greatly compromised by serious meta-issues, macro-issues and micro-issues it overlooks. At the macro-issues level, the document raises expectations it does not fully meet; it makes overgeneralized assumptions about its audience and data source; and it adopts an inappropriate condescending tone. At the macro-issues level, this document’s format of presenting its data is hampered by the unnecessarily lengthy stories and quotations; repetitive and monotonous question-answer method and an overload of statistical data in its notes. The brochure’s layout of the title page is also ineffective while one of the pictures on it is misleading. Lastly, its structure, language and physical appearance need to be overhauled and some graphics added as well. Finally, the macro-issues that need to be addressed in the brochure are its grammar and punctuation. The spelling in the brochure is up to date save for the ones in the verbatim quotations which are assumed to come from the respondents and not the authors per se. 5 Recommendations Following the technical appraisal of Getting Ready for University, a number of weaknesses have been pointed out. In order to improve its appropriateness, effectiveness, and accuracy, the following recommendations need to be followed through. 5.1 Meta-issues The title of the brochure should be narrowed down to Getting Ready for University: Some things you should know about its academic and social life Each of the three universities should prepare its own brochure, unique to its students and circumstances Revise the language of the brochure to give it a more persuasive tone Involve Grade 12 graduates in research on expectations of university life 5.2 Macro-issues Select stories and quotations of acceptable length for inclusion Vary the question-answer format with other engaging methods of asking for action Cut down the statistical data load to one per sub-section Place the institutional logo and name on the first page Replace the picture on the last page with an appropriate one Use graphics at the middle page to present some of the messages Reformat the size, colour and font to highlight the part (What does this mean for you?). 5.3 Micro-issues Proofread the document for grammatical corrections; for instance, correct the prepositions like ‘in the long run’ instead of ‘over the long run’ Be consistent in capitalization Remove all the symbols like “&” and “/” and replace them with words Write the abbreviations like “e.g.” and shortened forms like “doesn’t” in full Begin all sentences with words and not numerals Insist on using active voice throughout the document 6 References Anderson, PV 2011, Technical communication: a reader-centered approach, 7th edn, Wadsworth, Boston Bateman, J & Judy, D 2001, Approaches to Discourse: Improving text: From text structure to text type in the 4th International Workshop on Multidisciplinary, Yttre, Belgium, August 5-8 2001 Gorn, G, Chattopadhyay, A, Yi, T & Dahl, D 1997, Effects of Colour as an Executional Cue Advertising: They’re in the Shade, Management Science, vol. 93, no. 10 Hardwick, L 2006, Classical Persuasion through Grammar and Punctuation, Journal of the Association of Legal Writing Directors, vol. 3 Lannon J 2000, Technical Communication, 8th edn, Longman, Massachusetts Paraboni, Ivandré 2000, Describing Document Parts. Proceedings of the 3rd UK Special Interest Group for Computational Linguistics (CLUK-3), University of Brighton, UK. 34-41. Parker, RC 2006 Design to sell: Use Microsoft Publisher to plan, write and design great marketing pieces, Redmond, Wash, Microsoft Press. Plonsky, M 2006, Psychology with style: A hypertext writing guide. Available from: M. Plonsky. http://www.uwsp.edu/psych/apa4b.htm#II http://www.uwsp.edu/psych/apa4b.htm[31 October 2014] Style manual for authors, editors, and printers, 2002 6th edn, John Wiley & Sons Australia, Ltd, Singapore Trigg, R, Jeromson, B & Markwick, N 2004, Research students as editors, in Australian Style Council Conference, Sydney, Avavilable from: . [31 October 2014] Waller, Robert 1987, The Typographic Contribution to Language, Unpublished PhD Dissertation, Department of Typography and Graphic Communication, University of Reading. 7. Appendix A – Getting Ready for University 8. Appendix B: Getting Ready for University (with changes) Read More