My Big Fat Greek Wedding - Movie Review Example

My Big Fat Greek Wedding From the movie, “My Big Fat Greek Wedding,” which starred Nia Vardalos as Fotoula Portokalous, and John Corbett for the role of Ian Miller, various scenes will be described and their relevance will be explained in view of their consistency towards several principles in social psychology, more particularly with regards to conformity, realistic conflict theory and modern racism. The movie tells of the romance between Fotoula, a Greek, and the American, Ian Miller. How they will counter cultural differences in order that their love for each other will triumph; and the underlying reasons behind the human behaviors conveyed by the movie to the audience, that could be justified by the principles of conformity, realistic conflict theory and modern racism, shall be explored. The social culture of the Greeks will be briefly touched, because in so doing, the reactions and antics shown in the film will be easily understood, why they may be different from other cultures. The movie began with the narration of Toula, which is short for Fotoula, about her frustrations, that from the time she went to school at the age of 6 up to her present age of 30, her father, Gus, kept hounding her about a Greek woman’s ambitions in life, which are: to marry a Greek boy, make Greek babies and feed everyone. Her frustrations are apparent in the sense that all the members of the family did exactly what was expected from them, except Toula, who did not feel obligated to conform with the expectations of her clan. When an individual believes that others have better judgment of how to behave more correctly and properly, then they will conform; or conformity is when people obey either out of fear or out of a desire to appear cooperative even when acting against their own better judgment and desires, (Milgram, S. 2009). But it was not the case for Toula. Even though she kept hearing the anxieties of her family, like when they usually gather in the family restaurant, the Dancing Zorbas, they would whisper, My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2 though within hearing distance with Toula, how worried they are that nobody might want to marry her anymore. She goaded her father, with the help of her mother, Maria, that she be permitted to go to school and learn more about computer. On the part of Ian Miller, in one of his dinner dates with Toula, he revealed that his grandfather was a lawyer and his father as well. He did not also oblige himself to conform with the family tradition of becoming a lawyer like all the rest, because he chose to be a school teacher. For Toula, she needed to blend in the American society for reason of conformity, therefore she had to change her image. This was exactly the story in the movie “Shakespeare In Love,” where the lead star played by Gwyneth Paltrow had to change her image as a young lad for her to be accepted in the play. Another example is the character of Barbara Streisand in the movie “Yentl,” where, in the same manner, she had to cut her hair and assumed the trait of a young man to blend in the world of education. At that time only men and boys were allowed to study. Toula and Ian, by being defiant of what is expected from them, have unconsciously demonstrated the principle of individualism this time, aptly quoted by Rapson; “in small and rude communities, every free man, or at least every head of a household, feels his own significance and realizes his own independence” (Rapson, L. 1967). This theory extends further to Gus, who being Greek, and recognized as the head of the family, was humored by his wife Maria and his sister Voula, into believing that it was his idea for Toula to cease as a seating hostess of their restaurant and go to work in the travel agency of Voula, instead, because it is important for him to assume that it is always his decisions that will prevail. This part of the movie was hilarious, as Maria, Voula and Toula ganged up on Gus to successfully elicit from him the suggestion they hoped to hear, that Toula should work in the travel agency of Voula. My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3 Usually the basic role of the Greek women are to take charge of the home and bear children, hence, Maria was quite adept in manipulating the decisions that she wanted to come out from her husband. The sister of Toula was equally expert in ordering her husband around. When Gus found out that Toula accepted the proposal of Ian to get married, he was disgusted and quite aghast with the news, and again, it was Maria who convinced him to let go, because she believed that Toula and Ian loved each other. The film, being light, fun and feel-good, did not actually depict the idea of realistic conflict theory, because there were no allusion of any limited resources to fight about by any two parties or groups. There was no amplified competition to speak of in the entire movie, no hostility apparent within the family of Toula with her 27 cousins, and no family feud has ever erupted. The only conflict that can be described is the persistence of Gus to instill Greek customs and culture to Toula, and in the scenes when Gus first refused to give his consent to Toula to go to school and in another occasion already mentioned earlier, pertaining to the decision of Toula and Ian to marry and Gus adamantly objected, the audience could empathize with the whole family as they resolved a common problem and rejoiced together. They readily cooperated with the same goals, and this automatically erased any perceived or upcoming conflict. Simply put by Muzafer Sherif as he conducted an experiment entitled “robber’s cave experiment,” “the inescapable conclusion, however, is that cooperation on shared goals is of vital importance in resolving conflict peacefully” (Weseiis). My Big Fat Greek Wedding 4 All throughout the film, the most notable theory that persistently came into play was the modern racism. When Toula was only a child, during recess in her school, she could not join the white American children because she was different, and at that point the white children, being not fully aware of their prejudices, were probably influenced by their subconscious attitudes toward people of a certain race. Other obvious manifestation of modern racism in the movie was the insistence of Gus that it should be customary for their family to marry Greeks only. Being the most prevalent principle, modern racism should be defined first. Modern racism, as a subtle form of prejudice, entails a subconscious attitude that the holder may be fully unaware of, or one that is known of but repressed, but yet influences their thoughts and behavior, this attitude may become more conscious through education and self-exploration (Myers 1993). Racism is emotionally manifested when there is prejudice. The discussion of modern racism should be far more comprehensive. Another form of racism is the rejection of minorities, and ironically, in this film, it is the American culture of Ian that is in the minority, in contrast to that of the Greek culture of Toula. It was Ian who decided to be baptized into the Greek Orthodox religion, because this could please the family of Toula. For that matter, they were not even devoutly religious, because they only go to their church for marriage, funeral and baptism services. In this instance, it gave Ian the opportunity to conform, in order to please Toula and her family. At one point in the movie, Ian lovingly told Toula that he was willing to do anything to convince them in accepting him as the prospective husband of Toula. There was indeed strength in number, inasmuch as there were only Ian and his parents, they simply had no choice but to accede to the wedding plans of the family, such as holding the reception at the Aphrodite Palace, and not in the golf course where the Miller were members of. My Big Fat Greek Wedding 5 Cultural racism may show up in the forces behind majority group dominance in deciding what is socially valuable, and people tend to take as valuable what is most familiar to them (Axelson 1998). In the invitation that Maria excitedly prepared, the spelling of the name of Ian’s mom was misspelled as Harry instead of Harriet, and the Millers did not seem to mind, because at the wedding reception, Mr. Miller called her wife Harry. They did not think twice when they were repeatedly offered to drink the liquor of the Greeks up to the point of getting drunk. To further lend support to the modern racism being displayed by the Portokalous, the father had mentioned that Greeks should educate non-Greeks, as if only their culture is superior over the rest. Toula was guilty of individual racism. She had low self-esteem and inadequate self-concept. As a child, she questioned her parents why she had to attend a Greek school. She found her family to be weird, further enhanced when her grandmother was brought to live with them, whom she found to be even more weird who repeatedly got out of their house, run around the neighborhood with all sorts of mischief, and forgot how to go back home. When she was already dating Ian, and they stood by the bridge, she was hesitant to talk about her family and her cousins because she was not so proud of her race. She was not excited over the prospect of marrying Greek gentlemen, when her father attempted to find a Greek gentleman match for her many times, and whom she all abhorred. In this case, it was Toula who created her own bias against herself and her culture. It was she who felt inferior and inadequate being Greek. She saw the need to transform herself, otherwise, she would have assumed already the position that she would be a sorry Greek all her life. My Big Fat Greek Wedding 6 Luckily for Toula, Ian and his parents never for one moment in the film showed any signs of prejudice against the Greek culture, which speaks well of their maturity, education and confidence in themselves, that at this point, cultural differences need not matter anymore. In a way, Toula was afraid of displeasing her parents, even at the age of 30. It was funny when Ian retorted back to Toula’s father that he did not need to ask the permission to court Toula because she was of age already. Not for the Greeks. No matter what age, the women have to respect the head of the family. It is for this reason as well, that forced Toula and Ian to hide their affair from the family. This time what motivated the behavior of Toula was their Greek heritage. Toula is perfectly aware how smothering her family can be because they believe they have the right to meddle at anytime they want, in any family and domestic affairs they deemed to need interference. The family solidarity is important for the Greeks, hitherto they had to gather the members at all times. The Greek women have limited rights outside their homes and women are not encouraged to pursue education because it is a mistake to educate women, and anyway, their role is only to make Greek babies. Thus, it was already a brave move when Toula went after her dreams of pursuing her education in computer. She served as an inspiration to her brother Nicky, who had greater inclination towards arts but was not given the opportunity, until such time their father was made to understand about their dreams. The family of the Portokalous was altogether westernized, in the way they dressed and it was apparent that Nikki, the daughter of Voula was free to do as she pleases. My Big Fat Greek Wedding 7 On the overall, the film was produced in the most positive mood. Despite the fact that the Portokalous was a force to reckon with in terms of the possible union of Ian and Toula, the values they were forcing through were not harmful to anybody. Looking at their family solidarity and how they treated each other with respect based on their standards, could never suggest for anyone to be prejudiced against them. At the end of the story, where Toula gently urged their daughter to go to a Greek school, it was already a clear indication that Toula had accepted her heritage with pride and honor. Because of the strength in the support of her family, she had learned to be secure of her own culture and identity, which is a significant prerequisite in accepting one’s own culture first, and other cultures next. It is therefore a challenge when Baker (1996) paused this allusions: “are people that are more insecure in their own identity more likely to be racist? Could modern racism be an intellectual ego defense mechanism used by those insecure of their own cultural identity? Everybody is responsible for how people around view themselves, and the social influence and the environment one grew up in must be considered. It can further help when one will bear in mind that no man should allow his soul to be degraded into hating another human being. My Big Fat Greek Wedding 8 “References” Axelson, J. A. (1998). Counseling and development in a multicultural society. Baker, C. (1996). Foundations of bilingual education and bilingualism. Milgram, Stanley. (2009) Obedience to authority: An experimental view, 168. Myers, D. G. (1993). Social Psychology. Rapson, R. L. (1967). Individualism and conformity in the American character: Problems in American civilization. 31. Weseiis, M. Robber’s cave experiment. A peace pledge union project. Read More