Is Marriage a Public Relationship, a Private One, or Some Other - Essay Example

number Is marriage a public relationship, a private one, or some other relationship? Marriage is an that centers on private relations, but with high bearing on the public relations. Marriage is built upon the foundation of men and women being complementary to each other, with the prospective of biological reproduction being a conduit to the bearing of children. Children are an important aspect in marriage, and the children are always in need of a father and a mother. At this level, marriage seems to be a private relationship that is built on a limited number of individuals with the man and woman being at the epicenter. In redefining marriage, one must go beyond the existing marriage views and reject the truth. Marriage is restrictive and a mode of the creation of a children’s well-being in the society. This aspect shifts the view of marriage as a public relation to an affair that has impact on the general public life. Better still, however, marriage affects the community or the community affects marriage, it mainly revolves around privacy and individual decision making. However, marriage has been an institution that the states have taken into consideration as it is a basic place where the societal norms are imparted into the citizens. Governments have always encouraged marriage norms; permanence, sexual exclusivity and monogamy being the main pillars. The civil societies have been encouraged to continue pushing for the standards of marriage, hence reducing the burden of dealing with the same. A society’s future depends on how marriage’s future while the future of marriage revolves around the nation’s people to embrace the marriage standards and get to understand and adopt them. The society at large has been utterly concerned with the different aspects of marriage, with certain issues getting controversial. Currently, there are particular issues that have rocked the marriage world that have brought out what marriage is like an institution. Debated on whether same-sex marriage should be legalized or not have created much friction across the nations, genders and people of different social status and religion. The media both print and online have been buzzed by this contentious debate. This may indicate the importance of marriage as an institution. Underscoring this aspect is the fact that even governments have been involved in the analysis, with legislators drafting bills and discussing the subject of same sex marriage among other issues in the floor of the legislative houses. Moreover, one point is for sure; it is up to the individuals involved in marriage to make the final decision of these contentious matters. This drifts marriage towards it being a private relation in as much as it draws much attention from the public. There are three fundamental considerations that emerge from the whole same sex marriage contention among other concerns of marriage. The first aspect is the definition of marriage itself. Once a universally accepted definition is reached at, then, the matter will be as better as settled. Secondly, the impacts of marriage on the policies made by the government come into the picture. One would love to seek to know the reason as to why the public is much concerned with marriage issues, and then a clear direction shall be obtained. Lastly, there needs to be an examination of the consequences of having a redefinition of marriage and the exclusion of sexual complement (Corvino & Gallagher, 2012). The privacy of marriage is exhibited on the fact that a man comes together with a woman and agrees to be husband and wife. This is an agreement to be done by the two individuals themselves. Even though there are some circumstances where parents or other guardians are involved in the choosing of wife or husband, the decisions and handling of any marriage are made by the two individuals who have become husband and wife. This union of a husband and wife does lead to the bearing of children, who in turn, are ushered into a private relationship and form a unit referred to as a family. In order for a marriage to be in place, the application of the anthropological fact that women are different from men though they complement one another manifests. There is also a societal perspective of children needing a father and a mother. The marriage perspective being a private relationship again comes into scrutiny as marriage itself predates the state. The entire human civilization is founded on marriage, making marriage more than just a private affair. In fact, one can dare refer to marriage as a semi-private semi-public relationship. This point is stressed by the fact that several states have affirmed marriage to be reasonable and acceptable only between a man and a woman. Nonetheless, the government has in the years recognized marriage as a very important institution because its benefits to the society are massive. The states encourage the men and women to take care of their children by committing themselves to marriage through the recognition of a marriage institution. The liberty of individual information of marriage is vital. This is observed by the state despite the fact that marriage is recognized, protected and promoted. This is because, through marriage, the societal values and norms are entrenched into the children. Marriage is the only institution that is charged with the responsibility of rearing a child and childbearing. The privacy aspect of marriage again is evident given that, in promoting marriage, other types of relationships are not banned. Grownups have the liberty to make their own choices regarding the types of relationships that they want to get themselves in without necessarily getting any consent from the state. This makes marriage one of the institutions driven by individuals own decisions, making it private. A case study of America, every person, has the right to make his or her choice concerning the relationships they want to have, but no one has the liberty to redefine what marriage is for every other person. Marriage is, therefore, an arrangement that provides for a platform for individuals to approve of their emotional bonds and distribution of privileges that are legal (Driscoll & Grace, 2012). Prospects of marriage Marriage is all about the attachment of a man and a woman to one another and becoming husband and wife. Their sexual union produces children, whom they become father and mother too. During a child’s birth, the mother must always be there. The question that usually follows is whether the father will be there for the child and the period that he will be available to impact on the life of the child either positively or negatively. Marriage, therefore, creates a responsibility on the man’s side of caring for both the child which he aided in bearing and the wife, with whom he is endowed too. Here, marriage turns out to be a relationship that is shaped solely by two individuals, therefore, a private relationship. In the event that the father neglects his paternal responsibility of taking care of the wife and child, legal avenues are usually sort by the mother. This always leads to court battles. The father may be compelled to take care of the child or to be offering payments for the child’s daily up-keep, schooling and other needs. This brings out an aspect of marriage as not being all that private as another party gets involved in the resolution of matters that are in contention. Better still, marriage is a relationship that connects goods and people that would have otherwise been fragmented. Marriage connects mothers and fathers with babies, sex with babies, men and women and love with sex. Despite the fact that marriage is fundamentally based on individuals as a private relationship, there are several pressures that greatly shape and impact on this institution. Legal, cultural and social factors have a greater bearing on what marriage as a private relationship becomes. These factors can either detract or support the role of marriage in the society. The children can be used to define the prospects of marries as being either private relationships or public relationships. In a marriage, as mentioned earlier, the man and woman get children from a sexual relationship. This baby will grow to be a citizen in the society. The society at large cannot exist without the citizens who are in turn the products of marriages. This scope can be summarized as; mom and dad have a private relationship (marriage), give birth to a child who becomes a citizen in the society. The child again enters another private relationship with another person to build the marriage hence the cycle continues. Marriage in this respect turns out to be important to the public as through its fruits, a society is built. A child is a responsibility of the society in as much as that of the family. Neither the government nor the society is responsible for the creation of marriage despite the fact that marriage is a base for all the human civilization. The whole society benefits from marriage as it is the avenue through which love and stability are achieved in the society (Wolfson, 2007). To some extent, marriage can be said to be a public relationship. This aspect is evident in the way marriage is valued and treated in the society and by various governments. Most often than not, governments have issued public policies with regards to marriage, with the society setting the expected standards in marriage. Romano (2008), indicates that religious organizations and factions have also dictated the front of marriage. The public nature of marriage is exhibited on the fact that there are blanket agreements and considerations when it comes to marriage, different religions, communities, nations and regions have specific cultures that regulate, determine and shape the forms of marriage. Even though marriage is solely the decision of an individual to make, there is a public interest and expectation. This is the reason as to why Muslims have different marriage practices and expectations from the Christians. This is similar to the Hindus and all the other religions. Similarly, people with different cultures have different standards and expectation in marriage; the Americans have a different view and realization of marriage from that of the Indians, Chinese among others. In this aspect, there may be the privacy in marriage but there is a larger bearing on individuals when they choose to get into marriage. There are certain acceptable standards and marriage practices that may be unacceptable in other societal formations. However, there are universally acknowledged norms of marriage that apply across societies. An individual may want to argue the case of marriage being a private agreement between a woman and the man, but as well illustrated, there are limits to that privacy and different vested interests in marriage. Marriage has evolved in recent times. The perception of marriage being public was mainly held by the indigenous communities. This is the time where the parents, specifically the fathers, were the main deciders in who was to marry who. This meant that a marriage was not a private affair between the man and the woman, but was to be decided by their parents. However, this practice is fast fading away with only some parts of the world holding on to it. Nevertheless, marriage remains to be the property of the community and the society at large. A man has his family, related to a woman. In agreeing to leave their families and unite as husband and wife, they bring along with them the aspect of the two families. This is what creates the relationship of the in-laws. The two families of the married individuals do keep in touch and go to the extent of visiting one another. This clearly shows that in as far as marriage is an agreement that is private and is done between two individuals who have decided to get married as husband and wife; there is an extended burden of their respective families. This aspect is usually manifested in times of functions like weddings, burial, among others. Conclusion Every society and political community regulates and has set standards on the male, female sexual relationships. It is not because they care about romance but it’s ideally because marriage as a unit greatly impacts on the development, uprightness and morality of the society. The fact that marriage is a private relationship where man and woman agree to get together as husband and wife cannot be ignored. Marriage is indeed a private relationship. However, this private relationship has a great bearing on the entire society and the public at large. Work cited Corvino, J, Gallagher, M. Debating Same-Sex Marriage. New York: Oxford University Press, Jun 1, 2012. Print. http://books.google.co.ke/books?id=kD1pAgAAQBAJ&printsec=frontcover&dq=Debating+Same-Sex+Marriage-Corvino,+J,+Gallagher&hl=en&sa=X&ei=-k9WU_KmLMuprAe4z4GoAw&redir_esc=y#v=onepage&q=Debating%20Same-Sex%20Marriage-Corvino%2C%20J%2C%20Gallagher&f=false Driscoll, Grace. Real Marriage: The Truth about Sex, Friendship, and Life Together. New York: Thomas Nelson Inc, 2012. Print. http://books.google.co.ke/books?id=14dM-PMjJ8kC&printsec=frontcover&dq=Real+Marriage:+The+Truth+about+Sex,+Friendship,+and+Life+Together-Driscoll,+Grace&hl=en&sa=X&ei=PlBWU7P4DovArAeHlYHYBw&redir_esc=y#v=onepage&q=Real%20Marriage%3A%20The%20Truth%20about%20Sex%2C%20Friendship%2C%20and%20Life%20Together-Driscoll%2C%20Grace&f=false Romano, D. Intercultural Marriage: Promises and Pitfalls, London: Intercultural Press, 2008. Print. http://books.google.co.ke/books?id=ZyPi_nE1ZfgC&printsec=frontcover&dq=Intercultural+Marriage:+Promises+and+Pitfalls-Romano,+D&hl=en&sa=X&ei=jnZWU4uhK8W24AT3yYHADg&redir_esc=y#v=onepage&q=Intercultural%20Marriage%3A%20Promises%20and%20Pitfalls-Romano%2C%20D&f=false Wolfson, E. Why Marriage Matters: America, Equality, and Gay Peoples Right to Marry. New York: Simon and Schuster, Nov 1, 2007. Print. http://books.google.co.ke/books?id=u16ZRu1LVwUC&printsec=frontcover&dq=Why+Marriage+Matters:+America,+Equality,+and+Gay+People%27s+Right+to+Marry-+Wolfson,+E&hl=en&sa=X&ei=unZWU-KLJ6vO4QTc0oHQBA&redir_esc=y#v=onepage&q=Why%20Marriage%20Matters%3A%20America%2C%20Equality%2C%20and%20Gay%20Peoples%20Right%20to%20Marry-%20Wolfson%2C%20E&f=false Read More