A Proposal I Never Thought Id Consider by Saaba Saleem - Article Example

Saleem acknowledges that her parents have given her fair warning of her impending marriage to prepare her mentally. She has known all along that she has to face an arranged marriage. She has grown up in dual cultures of western independence and Pakistani religious culture. However, Saleem explains that her personal preference is one of filial piety. She says; ' But as a young Muslim woman, I also expect myself to accept the obligations I have as my parents' daughter -- regardless of the emotional cost to me.

'Saleem is in favour of the arranged marriage as she says that following her Pakistani culture and religion would give her 'security, familiarity and ease'. She would be saved from religious condemnation if she has proximity with the opposite sex if she dates on her own. Her parents would be saved from social criticism from their relatives. Saleem notes the hypocrisy of failed arranged marriages that persevere for the fear of the social stigma of divorce. Yet, the perpetuators of failed arranged marriages expect the tradition to be maintained because of the cultural identity and security afforded by the adherence of age-old customs.

Saleem's voice of concern over an arranged marriage stems from the fear of making a wrong choice under the pressure of limited time. She explains her reservations as being 'skepticism toward anything that is overly reliant on tradition rather than reason'. She reasons that she is not being a hypocrite to her personal convictions because she has valid reasons for agreeing to an arranged marriage. Her love, obligation and filial piety towards her parents enable her to take that leap of faith into an arranged marriage.

Saleem says that formerly, her pride, independence and misgivings encouraged her to avoid the opposite sex but now she has reached sexual maturity and has changed her mind about avoiding men. She explains that the passage of time has changed her and her circumstances. Indeed, there is a note of urgency in having an arranged marriage now because her father is sickly. He desires to see Saleem married to a good fellow Muslim to ensure the salvation of her soul and her unborn children's souls. Saleem states that her parents view her arranged marriage as their moral responsibility and obligation that must be executed before they can perform their religious rites like prayers and pilgrimage to Mecca.

The turning point that finally convinced her to go ahead with an arranged marriage was when her mother affirmed that no matter how reluctant she was to loose Saleem, she felt that her motherly duty outweighed her own selfish desires to keep her daughter close with her. Saleem understands the anguish of her weakening father. She resolves to marry and adapt to married life by having one foot in her western world and the other foot in Pakistani religious and cultural traditions.