Communication styles, love types, domestic violence - Essay Example

This essay draws its insights from two movies to explain love and the application of the various forms of love in these movies. “Gone with the Wind” tackles the subject of creation of relationships, whereas “Mrs. Doubtfire” tackles the subject of breaking down of relationships. The thesis that drives this paper is that love is very important in every relationship; true love is not selfish and does not lie in self-satisfaction, but in satisfying others and accepting them for whom they are.

Literature Review: Topic Love is a strong emotion, personal attachment and attraction that one feels for something or towards someone. Love is a stronger expression of positive sentiment, to be distinguished from “like”; it is less sexual and more inclined to emotional intimacy, to be distinguished from “lust”; love should also be distinguished from friendship as it entails a deeper and romantic interpersonal relationship with another person. In his book, “The Four Loves”, Clive Staples Lewis employs the perspectives of philosophy and Christianity to explain the nature of love and its application (Rogers 238).

Lewis describes love using the Greek conception of love, which classifies the types of love into four; agape, philia, eros and storge. In order to depict the nature of love, Lewis explains the love types as below; Agape Love This is true love, total love, often referred to as unconditional love. It is the purest and highest form of love. Unlike eros, agape love comes, not from the ego, but from an individual’s spirit. Agape love gives and expects nothing in return; it has no restrictions; it does not die; it does not fade away, and it is forever.

Agape love is unconditional because it has no conditions and boundaries; it is from the soul and does not judge. The ego is the one that judges; it discriminates in terms of wealth, color, weight, academic excellence, looks and age. Agape love is more divine and does not use this factors as a basis for loving someone (Lewis 133). When tragedy strikes, e.g. 9/11 or the earthquakes in Haiti and Japan, agape love is evident in the hearts of many who go out of their ways to help the victims of these tragedies.

Agape love understands; it is patient, forgives, loyal and self-sacrificing. Lovers in this relationship derive pleasure from giving, more than from receiving. The positive side of agape love is its generosity. However, it can cause guilt in the lover, due to natural disappointments. Philia Love This is a platonic, affectionate and warm love between friends. This love makes on desire friendship. This is the bond that exists between people who share something in common. Lewis describes love as the least natural, biological, necessary and instinctive of loves (Lewis 70).

He states that traditional friendship like the Biblical friendship between Jonathan and David, vanished and that modern society disgraces the ideology of true friendship. He goes on to add that, in the ancient days, friendship was the most complete and happiest of loves. However, he describes friendship as potential for pride, and anti-authoritarianism. Eros Love Eros relationships involve losing, finding, and losing love again. It is an obsessive love that sends out the message that, in life, one needs to find that one true love in order to be complete, and to find true happiness. It is a