Premarital Cohabitation - Research Paper Example

 Premarital Cohabitation Student Name Student ID Lecturer Submission Date University Premarital cohabitation is the phenomenon under which couples believe that living together would embody the solution behind their lingering issues and thus they would know each other better and thus make love whenever they wish to. The effects on society with regards to premarital cohabitation are diverse because in Western society people might not take it as an offending act but the same might happen within Asia and the underdeveloped nations of the world, where conservative ideologies are more rampant. This paper specifically takes a look at the way the issue of premarital cohabitation has come about and how it has been dealt with, within the dynamics of the society as well as repercussions that emanate from the same ranks. One should believe that premarital cohabitation comes about when the couples are open to exploration and they want to seek new grounds with their partners. They believe that if they live with each other before they get married, it would give them a clue as to how they are and what they do to conduct their respective chores. It would also tell them that how the couples are ready to take on challenges, how they cope up with pressure and so on and so forth. There are a host of issues which could easily be digested within the terrains of premarital cohabitation when one thinks of the same notion. The element of having premarital intercourse is part and parcel with the phenomenon of premarital cohabitation because couples want to know beforehand how they will adopt with each other’s sexual desires and similar cravings that will shape up once they tie the nuptial knot. What premarital cohabitation does in essence is to tell all and sundry that the individuals under this equation have to make things work for their own betterment. If they cannot, it would be in their best interest to separate and thus move on with their lives. This is a very simple and well understood premise of the premarital cohabitation realms. One must also believe that premarital cohabitation does not ask the individuals within its aegis to hold on to each other since they are basically under a contract to make things work and find out more and more about one another. There is reason available to suggest that premarital cohabitation does play the trick when the chips are down and when the emphasis is on discerning how well the companion cooperates and lives his/her life the way it is supposed to be in a marriage relationship (MacManus 2008). Knowing the other person is a very significant aspect because it helps solve quite a few issues. It is indeed an essential ingredient since both of these individuals are doing their best to come close to each other, and thus get married. There is the knowledge that is gained from the strengths and weaknesses that exist within the fore of an individual, and these should therefore be understood from an aspect where finding out more and more is the key to success as far as premarital cohabitation is concerned. The element of sharing for the other partner also comes about as a reality because it tells the couples how they should think about their future and what actions and behaviors can be termed as acceptable in the long run (Teachman 2003). These aspects are important to understand because the entire phenomenon of premarital cohabitation discusses the tangent of sharing, finding out what is hidden and exploring how far the partners can go in the wake of getting married. Their love for one another at odd times of the day is determined and the partners keep a close look on each other by witnessing how they conduct their own selves in both the difficult circumstances as well as the easier ones. Thus premarital cohabitation concerns more of such individuals who are re-marrying and thus want to find out how their future partners would believe in the philosophy of marriage (Cuim 2003). Since they have broken marriages and relationships within their folds in the past, they would now like to have a totally different perspective, and this can only be achieved if they live with their desired partners for a specified amount of time. The element of learning from one another is driven by the hunger to know more. Since knowing about the partner comes from finding out how the other person would react to different expressions, emotions and sentiments, one should believe that premarital cohabitation is indeed the best possible beforehand solution available to couples who have decided to get married. From a societal perspective, premarital cohabitation is considered a bane. The reason for this lies in the fact that people like to comment in a very negative way regarding the premarital cohabitation that the couples have had but would not mind doing it themselves if the time comes by for their own selves. However there are different implications for this phenomenon in varied regions of the world. Asia might consider this as a very non-doable thing but the West would actually buy into this theory. Some hardcore conservatives are of the view that premarital cohabitation spoils the whole sanctity of marriage which must bring together the people for the overall goodness that has to come within their lives. One must understand that the role of society is indeed an important one and it should be given priority by the couples who have planned to have it within their lives. If the society does not provide the barricades towards the disposition of premarital cohabitation it would not be considered as a bane at all. However the differing viewpoints of premarital cohabitation make the entire debate an interesting one, and hence the criticism attached with the topic at hand is something that can make the people understand the varied nuances that come about within the domains of these couples, who have actually believed in premarital cohabitation for so long (Witcher 2004). These are important areas of consideration as one wants to gain an insight into how premarital cohabitation will work to the best possible effects for their own selves as well as their partners. Premarital cohabitation is indeed a phenomenon that has made heads turn for all the wrong reasons. People believe it is an exercise that does not bring in much value for the partners and couples under consideration. However the people who employ the philosophy of premarital cohabitation within their folds do not think in the same vein. They opine that premarital cohabitation is something which shall bring in the much needed satisfaction that they seek to achieve once they become mature and get married. Therefore the belief is that it is always good to employ the element of premarital cohabitation so that they could reap the dividends at a later stage. The ones who have benefited a great deal from premarital cohabitation believe that it is a must-try and others should use it to find out more about their partners. Then again it is a matter of one’s own priorities getting the better of him/her. If someone believes that premarital cohabitation would not play the trick, there is a good amount of evidence that suggests the fact that premarital cohabitation is not meant to be for this individual. In essence, premarital cohabitation does solve a number of aspects that might arise at a later stage within their lives but it is by no means a certain guarantee that the same shall happen. There could be drawbacks if one staunchly buys the theory of premarital cohabitation as the negatives are there nonetheless. The society has different representations for premarital cohabitation and thus people view the whole debate as an intriguing one. Some comprehend that premarital cohabitation is the basis of rifts within relationships and it is always good to try the company of each other after the couple has been married, and has practically lived together for a certain while. However this hardly happens and the couples who are staunch believers of the ideology of premarital cohabitation do not buy the same dictum (Christopher 2001). Some advocates of family affairs and related behavioral sciences are of the view that it is always a good sign of a successful marriage and related associations to know the partners beforehand. It develops a sense of maturity between them and allows them to think from a collective fashion. This is a very helpful aspect when one deciphers the true value of premarital cohabitation and its linked connotations (Cherlin 2005). Then again there are critics who totally negate such sentiments that the advocates have been raising for quite a while now. One should believe that it is always good to follow what one’s heart says and thus follow it rigorously. It will enable people to have a clear cut idea what their partners do at different times of the day and night, as well as gain a first hand insight into their work manifestations, different domains and realms which keep on occurring at all times. Understanding premarital cohabitation is important as it offers so much more than mere cohabitation – it makes one to decipher the true meaning of living with someone who you desire to be with in the coming times. Furthermore, the significance of premarital cohabitating becomes apparent when the issue of rockier marriage arises. This is because men and women would cheat after they are married and hence there would be no looking back by the other partner. In a premarital cohabitating scenario, if a partner cheats the other partner, there is always room for leaving the other partner high and dry and moving out of the house. The relationship ends there and then – no room for legal procedures, no court cases and no litigations at all. Moving ahead with the discussion, one finds that premarital cohabitating can have lasting effects on the women since they are known to be at the receiving end of the physical and sexual abuse by their male partners. This is a sad fact but reality hits one hard when he tries to get the hang of related discussions. It is a known thing that usually men cohabit because they seek convenience (Edin & Reed 2005). They think their sexual fantasies would be fulfilled, a woman would cook them food, clean their laundry and put their house chores in order. This is indeed true because they are looking for a short term ‘advantage’ that they seek to take from the women. In a way, premarital cohabitation provides one another a little window to adjust within the local domains as well as to better comprehend the finer aspects related with each other’s lives. This is a better way in which different chores shape up within the future and it is better to have a window of what is going to happen within the future. If it is for the good, the partners can embrace it with happiness and if not, there is always a room for ending the premarital cohabitating relationship and thus moving ahead further with their respective lives (Horn 1999). There is no legal procedure involved in such a situation and everything happens based on mutual consent. It is also possible that the partners remain the best of friends and help each other in different issues and matters of combined interest since they have a deeper level of comprehension with each other’s needs and wants. It could be remarked here that cheating after marriage is a trauma that can neither be taken by a man nor by a woman, no matter whichever society they belong to. Nearly every culture has had some negatives drawn against the element of cheating in a marriage and thus all endeavors must be made to address this issue once and for all. Also, the pros and cons of premarital cohabitating have been outlined in cultural settings and have usually been described in detail by the cultural understandings and interpretations. Some religions like Islam are totally against such practices and even the religion of Christianity at some places and more so within the sexual domains has abstained from premarital cohabitating in essence. In the end, it is quintessential to understand that premarital cohabitating has its pros and cons all at the same time. It is best for the couples to decide what they want for their own selves and how they could avoid altercation that could arise in their later life. References Cherlin, A. J. (2005). American marriage in the early twenty fist century The Future of Children Vol. 15, No. 2, Marriage and Child Wellbeing, pp. 33-55, from JSTOR database. Christopher, F. S. (2001). To Dance the Dance: A Symbolic Interactional Exploration of Premarital Sexuality. Lawrence Erlbaum Associates Cuim, V. (2003, September 17). Sex and the cities. The South China Morning Post, pp. 14, From LexisNexis database Edin, K. & Reed, J. M. (2005). Why don’t they just get married? Barriers to marriage among the disadvantaged Vol. 15, No. 2, Marriage and Child Wellbeing, pp. 117-137, from JSTOR database Horn, W. (1999, 23 March). Cohabitation makes Disengaged Bedfellows. The Washington Times MacManus, M. J. (2008 August 3). Soaring cohabitation risky? The Washington Times, pp. B4 Teachman, J. (2003). Premarital Sex, Premarital Cohabitation, and the Risk of Subsequent Marital Dissolution among Women. Journal of Marriage and Family, Vol. 67 Witcher, P. (2004, March). Not-so-cozy Cohabitation. World and I, Vol. 19 Read More