Loss of Self Identity - Essay Example

? Loss of Self Identity Loss of self identity This paper examines the possibility of a person losing identityafter his or her connection with other people is stripped away. The first step is to decide what personal identity really is. A person’s identity can be defined as an aggregate of all behavioral, mental and emotional attributes that lead to the formation of a distinctive character of a person (Weigert & Hastings, 1977; Leary & Tangney, 2005). Each person in a family, community or society has his or her unique and inherent aspects as far as tastes, preferences and responses to various stimuli are concerned. The identity of a person leads to formulation of his or her personality. Emotionally, some people are more or less affected by various happenings or activities of others that other people are. Socialization, abilities and way of thinking of an individual are other areas that lead to defining the identity of a person. More often than not, people attempt to define or describe the character of another person. This means that people will often try to determine when a person’s personality sways. However, the identity of a person is a matter of his or her beliefs and concerns about his or her abilities, tastes and preferences – identity is not a matter of how other people think about a person. So the simplest answer to the question of study is that a person cannot easily lose his or her identity after losing connection with other people. Identity is all about what a person thinks he or she is and what he or she can do (Weigert & Hastings, 1977). Taking a case in a family, for example, it is easy to determine whether it is possible for a person to lose his or her identity. For example, sometimes it happens that a person may be addicted to a particular behavior that hardly any other member of the family likes or can tolerate. This may result into a lot of differences where the other members of that family start describing the character as weird. Well, it is far from normal that a person may develop a particular behavior that is unique to himself or herself; however, no matter how much the other family members may hate the behavior, that behavior will still remain because the person in question likes it (Price, Friedland & Vinokur, 1998). Sometimes it is true that a person may express low self esteem or become depersonalized but that person still believes in his or her abilities and values. Identity begins with self awareness (Price, Friedland & Vinokur, 1998; Leary & Tangney, 2005). In other words, identity answer the questions such as ‘Who am I? What is my purpose? What are the things that I can do by myself? What are my emotional and temperament limits? To what extent can I control my desires?’ and so on (Weigert & Hastings, 1977). It is not about how other people perceive a person. Take an example of a physician who has all academic qualifications but has little experiences dealing with patients. For such a physician, success or failure largely depends on his or her self awareness than how connected to others (Weigert & Hastings, 1977) he or she is. In other words, such a person can easily initiates relationship with the people in the new work environment and uses his or her inherently built and believed abilities and perception of the self to counter any chances of failure. In the long run, it does not matter how much such a physician is connected or relates to other people in the first place so as to perform his or her duties. It takes his or her attributes such as the ability to create a working relationship and to believe in the positive significance of diversity to work (Price, Friedland & Vinokur, 1998). Such a physician focuses on what he or she can do and not necessarily how others feel about his or her work and results. He or she believes that she does the best he or she can and believes that is what is expected of him or her. The identity of a person indeed never leaves him or her. A good way to look at trends of identity is to look at the renowned leaders of the world (Price, Friedland & Vinokur, 1998). Taking a simple survey of a leader like Abraham Lincoln will prove that identity of a person lives with him or her forever. Aforementioned, a person’s values define his or her identity. Lincoln ended slavery in the United states and this obviously had negative impact on slave owner’s. Lincoln lived a life in which he had both experiences of slavery and non-slavery. It is easy to know that, during the era of slavery, Lincoln never liked slavery. When he abolished slavery, he did not fear stripping away his relationship with slave owners. It is very likely that the slave owners so affected were not pleased with the idea and thus they potentially hated Lincoln as a politician. But Lincoln did not turn back on his desire to end slavery terming it as inhuman. So, if Lincoln knew very well that he could become less popular among Americans and if he lost his good relationship with American slave-owners, did this lead to losing of his identity? The answer is ‘no’. He, in fact, continued preaching how the society should entirely leave slave trade and slave ownership altogether. He therefore lived with his identity – he perceived slavery as inhuman, believed that all people were equal and that all people were entitled to equal individual rights. Lincoln’s identity is far from other past leaders but he forged forward without fear of becoming unpopular in America. Another example is that of Nelson Mandela, who strongly believed in racial equal dominance irrespective of race. Mandela was threatened by death to leave his course; even so, he never left his identity as a brave person who was for the unitization of the society. He was sentenced to life imprisonment and he was ready to die for the people. After many years in jail, far from the people he loved, Mandela came out and still upheld his earlier beliefs and values. Although a person’s identity cannot change, there is a possibility of a person acquiring many other sub-identities. According to Leary and Tangney (2005), when a person takes on new roles in life, he or she develops other minor identities. For example, a person may become a churchgoer and thus and thus acquires a churchgoer identity. Similarly, a person may become a volunteer in an organization and such a person acquires a new identity as a volunteer. These are role identities. There are other easily acquired identities such as behavioral and cultural changes. All these revolve around the primary identity – what a person believes about himself or herself. Acquired identities such as role identities will not easily be lost because, for example, a person stops playing a particular role. In fact, according to Leary and Tangney (2005), that person retains the identity even in absentia. There is a common confusion between loss of identity and depersonalization. Loss of personal identity does not exist in nature but depersonalization exists. Depersonalization is a change in self conceptualization (not self-perception) and perception of others (Leary & Tangney, 2005). Depersonalization does not in any way mean that a person changes what values he or she believes in but rather the changes in the ways in which one addresses these values. For example, one has particular measures of temperament but he or she can modify his or her temperament so that to fit in a particular group or team of people or in an organization. This does not change what a person believes in. before Lincoln abolished slavery and racial segregation; he lived around it first not because he liked slavery but because he lacked a good and workable approach towards slavery. He had depersonalized himself so that he could live in the society as it was and allow some time to device ways of abolishing slavery. The point is: he lived with his identity. In a sense, this indicates that one can hide identity but one cannot change it. From the discussion above it is quite evident that identity is innate and cannot easily change, be destroyed or be lost. However, one can develop other identities that can only be stitched onto the personal identity. The relationship with other people leads to development of social identity that is by far different from personal identity. Social identity, role identity and behavioral identity are temporary and depend on the environment one lives in (Leary & Tangney, 2005). Personal identity comprises one’s beliefs and values that are inbuilt even before interacting with other people. In other words, personal identity is known to the self and other people do not affect it. A person can hide it from other people so as to fit in their society or in particular organizations but he or she cannot destroy or lose it. The example of Abraham Lincoln is an enough conviction to this cause. So when a person’s relationship with other people is stripped away, such a person’s identity remains intact. After all, it may be that it is for the uniqueness of one’s identity that other people may drift their attention from a person and hence stripped away relationship. List of references Leary, M.R. & Tangney, J.P. (2005). Handbook of Self and Identity. New York City, NY: Guilford Press. Price, R.H., Friedland, D.S., & Vinokur, A.D. (1998). Job loss: Hard times and eroded identity. In J.H. Harvey (Ed.) Perspectives on loss: A sourcebook. Philadelphia, PA: Taylor & Francis. Weigert, A.J. & Hastings, R. (1977). Identity loss, family and social changes. American Journal of Sociology, 82(6), pp. 1171-82. Read More