Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction Critique - Essay Example

? Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction of Mark R. Laaser examines several issues to do with sexual addiction. He discussed example of several instances of what constitutes sexual addiction. He also equates sexual addiction with sin and offer several intervention mechanisms. In his discussion, Laaser focuses more on religious perspective on the issue. He also offers professional bit into the matter. He sheds more light into the matter using Biblical worldview and other ethical perspectives. According to the author, there is sexual sin in the wider society and in the church. Consequently, he feels the need to offer an intervention so that everyone may live a righteous life. Summary In this book, Mark R. Laaser explores issues to do with sexual addiction. In general, the author has approached the subject in an organized manner where he begins by defining what sexual addiction is. He then proceeds to trace how sexual addiction may come about and offer a process towards healing sexual addiction in general as well as healing sexual addiction in the church. In fine details, the author addresses sexual addiction in the following way. The author offers that as some people are struggling with sexual addiction, there are those who are of the opinion that sexual addiction does not really warrant being called so. The author opens the early chapter of the book by affirming that an addiction is about not being in control of the habit. Like many other forms of addiction, Laaser notes that sexual addicts also that their condition is something that they have deliberately chosen. They perceive it an act of the free will while, in the real case, they are cannot control their leaning towards such a direction (Laaser, 2004, p.43). The author observes that by engaging in certain sexual escapades in the form of pornography and others, the repeated approach to gratify desires, sometimes born out of negative emotions, wire the brain to adopt such responses as solutions to certain problems and needs. This, the author crafts out, implies an addiction, and in this case sexual addiction. Laaser also observes that a good proportion of those who should be leading exemplary lives as good examples, have fallen short of what is expected of them (Laaser, 2004, p. 19). The author observes that there are building blocks of sexual addiction. Offers an example of a wide range as examples and notes that many people would deny the problems. He observes that sexual addiction leads to more and more desire to try explicit sexual encounters. Such a scenario, he notes, eventually lead to a situation of lack of satisfaction in sexual encounters. After analyzing why sexual addiction is not healthy, the author highlights that there is a need for such a person to be committed to taking a U-turn. According to the author, the best solution is to undertake a spiritual journey by believing in God’s power to help bring about a change in all situations as indicated. The author believes that a former sexual addict must come out clean and confess the previous sins. Such a solution, he offers, should be demonstrated by the addict making efforts to seek a new beginning by living righteously according to the will of God (Laaser, 2004, p. 128). Besides, the author also does not rule out the need to confront such individuals so that they can see a need to seek a new beginning. Even so, the author recognizes that not just any approach could apply in all cases. One may observe this where Laaser notes that treatment for sexual addiction should focus on the building block. He outlines that the right way to deal with the issue would be to address the victim’s shame, sexual behaviors, fantasy, and rituals amongst others as a remedy to the situation. The author offers that the idea is to seek healing according to need. For instance, he advises that sexual addicts that are already in an institution like marriage tend to face marital infidelity issues (Laaser, 2004, p.133). Consequently, he recommends that they should seek their solution from the perspective of infidelity. Among the numerous possible solutions that the author advances, he also points out that the role that exercise plays remain crucial and should not be ignored. He also affirms that all intervention plans should focus on the subjects being comfortable. Otherwise, he cautions that the probability of reverting to old habits may be inevitable. Again, the author emphasizes on spirituality. He also recommends that a counselor should come up with a plan that would ensure such a couple gets to nurture their spirituality together (Laaser, 2004, p.136). Laaser closes his analysis and discussion on sexual addiction by observing the happenings in the church, as there is a connection between the church and families. He points out that pastors and priest have indeed hurt the church. He observes that even in the groups where pastors and priests are found, there are sexual addicts. Owing to this, he asserts that such spiritual leaders have wounded the church. To avert such instances, he recommends that the church should not sleep but be on the lookout for warning signs. This way, he claims, the church can offer pastor protection in the face of sexual addiction (Laaser, 2004, p.194). Analysis In this book, Laaser examines sexual addiction in the society and offers some useful insight into dealing with the problem. The author analyzes sexual addiction as a behavior that portrays maladjustment and attempts to offer solutions. He does not agree with the claims by other schools of thoughts that there can never be sexual addiction. To refute this claim, the author offers an explanation and observes that any habit or behavior that makes the brain inclined to do something in a particular tends to be an addiction. Although this may not be the case all the time, his explanations suffice the argument. The author also underscores a critical point when he observes that sexual addiction differs in form and manner (Laaser, 2004, p.37). Here, Laaser rightly observed as a matter of consequence of behaviors that each sexual addiction is unique in its own way. His point of view is that while there is a need to respond to sexual addiction with an action plan, such intervention should be case specific. He also believes that all interventions should be backed up with spirituality. While this may work to some extent, it is difficult to conclude with certainty that it will always work. Many behavior change interventions have been approached from various psychological models that do not incorporate religion, and all have worked. One may also take that the author’s views concern only Christians. The author uses various quotes from the Bible to back up his claims, which is a good thing. Owing to this, one can say that the author has left other religious groups although the issues being addressed concern many people in the society. Alternatively, the author could have used secular moral theories and ethics so that the audience becomes large. This is not to imply that the Christian moral theories do not work, but that they tend to leave out other faiths. Sexual addiction is not just a Christian affair, and its intervention approaches should take care of everyone. Another implication of using a Christian perspective in the subject area may make people from other religious segments ignore the message although it may have useful information on how to deal with the whole issue. Even so, Laaser mounts a strong case in dealing with how to bring sexual behaviors to a halt. As much as he has focused so much on religious philosophy, he also recognizes the role of science in behavior change. He observes that since he is examining issues to do with sexual addiction, medical intervention is inevitable since sex affects the human body. One may say that the author hits out on the need to be responsible and realistic when he proposes the need for STDI tests (Laaser, 2004, p.170). Sexually Transmitted Diseases and Infections (STDI) are rampant in today’s society. By observing this, the author seems to be sending a message home to counselors that intervention should be not done blindly. He probably intended to demonstrate to counselors and other caregivers that the fact that someone has agreed to work on behavior is not the only thing. If couples have agreed to come together, then there is a need to ensure that none infects the other. He is also realistic to various fixed schedules within which people have to operate. Owing to this, he proposes outpatient program and inpatient treatment. The author uses both implicit and explicit perspective to offer morals lessons. For instance, he uses the incidence of Jesus and the Samaritan woman at the well. The Bible records that the woman had been married to many men and the current man he had was not her husband. To that extent that is explicit. In line with the theme of the book, it is implicit that the woman probably had a sexual addiction according to Laaser’s prism of sexual sin (Laaser, 2004, p.123). This way, the author associates the current event with the ones in the Bible and proposes a divine solution as is provided for in the holy book. From this, one may say that the author has made an effort to reconcile Biblical worldview with the lives of victims of sexual addiction. It is also an appeal that he proposes as a coping mechanism since people are usually shy about talking about sex. To a Christian reader, this kind of approach is likely to be appealing. One is able to understand and relate the situation to a Biblical context. It is also observable that the author has insisted in professionalism. As much as he has approached the subject from a predominantly Christian perspective, one can say that he has recognized the weight of the issue and given it a touch of professionalism. He proposes a number if interventions, but also insists on counseling. When he proposes the use of counselors, it is observable that he moves from the mere religious approach to psychological approach. In the psychological model, the basis of counseling is behavior. Consequently, Laaser asserts that an intervention should not only confirm that one cares but also that there is a concern about certain behaviors, which have to be outlined to the subject. He also warns against admonishing victims during the course of the counseling. For instance, he warns counselors in advance about using a statement like “how could you do this?” so that the sex addict may not become defensive (Laaser, 2004, p.142). He also offers the use of professional and friendly terms such as separation instead of divorce. An instance of professional deviation may also be inferred from the author’s proposal on group approach. In this model, the author analyzes group dynamics and recognizes that there is power in this approach. Even so, he ignores the fact that although the approach may only work for those who have accepted their situation or predicament. Though well intended, the author assumes that all victims will open up during group intervention (Laaser, 2004, p.146). The fact is that some people would rather deal with their problems with a single counselor for fear of exposing a lot about themselves. Consequently, it may not be a practical solution that where a single counselor’s approach has not yielded results, then group approach should ensue. The most probably solution is that every situation is unique and when a method has failed, then it is only rational to assess why it has failed before trying another approach on the same person. Doing so may just solidify a person’s defense on the matter. Even so, the author’s arguments are clear. His use of his own life and Biblical examples as evidence validates most of his arguments and proposals though not all. His concepts flow logically though with some gaps of inconsistencies such as appropriate approach for each unique situation. There are no contradictions though there is a need to tailor interventions to specific cases rather than a general approach. Conclusion In conclusion, one may observe that the author addresses key issued on contemporary society. Many people shy away from matters pertaining to sex. The book adds value to Christian living and general morality of the society. The author challenges his readers to take a bold step and recognize the need to address sexual addiction in the church and the wider society. It adds to the knowledge of the church that they should also be responsible for their leaders such as pastors and priests (Laaser, 2004, p.204). Laaser emphasizes that human beings may be weak in their nature equally. Subsequently, there is a need for constant uplifting of one another within the teachings of the Bible. The piece of work would be very helpful to counselors, the church, the wider society and religious leaders. This is because it addresses issues that are pertinent and rather too obvious in their day-to-day encounters. Probably the most important reason why these categories of people would find the books helpful is that it also attempts to offer solutions to the identified problems. Reference Laaser, M. R. (2004). Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction. Grand Rapids: Zondervan. Read More