Outsider in a Society - Research Paper Example

Teacher’s 18 April Outsider in a society In order to comprehend the psychological and physical status of an outsider in a society, we first need to grasp the definite implication of the word ‘society’. Basically, a group of people residing together in a region, sharing the same language, culture, customs and rituals constitute a society. Whom can we precisely define as an outsider? It is not necessary that an outsider only means a person belonging to another place or another society; an individual may have taken birth in its own group of people, yet could be considered as an outsider, as he may vary in color, socio-economic status, race, nationality, ethnicity, religion beliefs or in physical appearance. When an outsider enters a society, he or she may have to go through several types of impediments. How an outsider is treated, predominantly depends upon the temperament of the society. Usually, it is witnessed that an outsider is always vetoed by the general public. It would be absolutely fallacious if it is assumed, that in all societies this kind of attitude with the outsiders is prevalent. The approach of the people towards the outsider, furthermore, depends upon who the outsider is and for what reason is he declared an outsider. For example, if a foreigner visits India for vacations, he is likely to be stared at by the onlookers as he looks different from the people residing there. His different physical appearance makes him an outsider amongst the people of India. He may not understand the language of the Indian people. The Indian culture and traditions, the festivities may attract and fascinate him, whereas, the Indian people would look up at him in awe. Indian people respect their guests a lot; they consider them equal to God. Therefore, in this case the outsider is warmly welcomed by the mainstream society. But the same community, the same people in India, considers a child born with a physical disability, a burden or a curse. They keep their children away from such a child and socially isolate the poor child in every possible way or they may look down upon him with sympathetic eyes. One outsider belonged to a different society, while the other one belonged to the same society. Both were the odd ones out. Yet both were treated in contrary ways. So, now it has become apparent to us that how the two outsiders were treated on the basis of their physical appearances, by the same group of people. Therefore, how an outsider is regarded, rests upon the mindset of the society as well as the status of the outsider. Being an outsider in a society may have either positive or negative effects on a person. According to Eisenberger and Matthew D. Lieberman social rejection, even the anticipation of rejection, causes severe damaging psychological, physiological and behavioral effects. Going through social rejection, being separated from others, being treated as an outsider, being left out, is a “wounding experience”. It hurts even at home, if your family members pretend to forget your birthday, you feel so dejected, so left out. It is a psychological fact that every person needs love and affection. No one likes to be rejected by the others or looked down upon for some reason or the other. “Rejection impairs cognition and self- regulation.” (Sydney Symposium of Psychology) The same happens in the case of Mrs. Pontellier, who is rejected by her own family. A woman, wife of a successful businessman of New Orleans, and a young mother of two, Mrs. Edna Pontellier comes from the Protestant south (Kentucky) and is totally unacquainted with the life-style, customs and social conventions of the French Creole society. “The Awakening”, written by Kate Chopin, portrays how the people around her affect her in various ways and leads her to change her views and thinking about herself and her life. Kate Chopin, in “The Awakening”, displays the life-style of the Creole society in Louisiana. The Creole’s considered themselves different from the Anglo-Americans and continued to practice the customs and rituals that their French and Spanish ancestors had taught them. They took pleasure in betting, entertainment and social get-togethers. The women of the society were expected to run the household well and to nurture their kids. They were considered as respectable if they did so. While men partied, women engaged themselves in maintaining the house, bringing up their children and polishing their skills in art, music and conversation. In the Creole society, the status of a woman was not more than a property of her husband. In such a male dominant society where women had no freedom to lead her life according to her will, Mrs. Pontellier found it tough from the very beginning to accept the life-style of the Creoles. She was not a motherly kind of a woman who would take interest in her kids, rather than involving herself in all sorts of things. Even though her neighbors were friendly with her, she could not imagine herself to be one of them as she could not cognize their assumed rules and conventions. Mrs. Pontellier, brought up in an entirely different environment, in the beginning, is restrained by the Creole rules and customs; she knows she has to take care of the household and her kids; she is aware of her duties, yet not immersed into them. She is not a malicious sexual renegade. She knows her limits and hence is hesitant in breaking any norm. This confirms the mental state of an outsider who has just entered a new habitat. She is scared of breaking any rule or custom of the society, she is hesitant in following her heart, and she fears rejection by the society. so she is repelling any kind of rebellious attitude towards the society. She is young and her husband, like other dominant men, likes to spend time outside the house, is always engrossed in his business activities and seldom talks to her. Kate Chopin shows how Edna’s husband treated her; he looked "at his wife as one looks at a piece of personal property which has suffered some damage." (Chopin) He treats her like any other property he possesses and shows no interest in her world. On one night when Mr. Pontellier wanted to share something with his wife, his wife displayed little interest as she was very tired. This angered Mr. Pontellier and he went to check his sons and assumed that one son was having fever. He came back and scolded his wife for being a bad mother. Mrs. Pontellier did not say anything at that time but later on she went out of the room and sobbed. This ratifies the attitude of the male in the Creole society and how Mrs. Pontellier feels fragile and rejected by her own husband. She is a sensitive woman, who cries at her husband’s scolding. She is being treated as an outsider even in her own family. No one seems bothered about her, nor does she show any concern about them. She is dissatisfied with her marital life. She is overwhelmed with unhappiness, which keeps on growing but she does not show any kind of rebellious behavior, instead she always used to think good about Mr. Pontellier. The attitude of her husband towards her though disturbs her, still, she does not let it overcome her, instead Mrs. Pontellier looks out for happiness and she finds solace in Robert Lebrun, who shares same interests as Mrs. Pontellier. She finds a mate in him who spends time with her, talks to her and most importantly, she feels happy with him. All these are negative effects of rejection on a person. It raises selfishness and forces a person to act upon impulsively. In the course of the novel, there are some flashbacks to Mrs. Pontellier’s childhood in Kentucky, where she was caged by her father and the rigid rules and customs of the society. She found freedom and happiness in the blue grass meadow in Kentucky. We gather the past and the present life of Mrs. Pontellier from what the writer provides us with; and we perceive that Edna like any other human being, was born free but, the society suppressed her desires, dreams and curiosities, just because she was a girl and later on a woman, a wife, a mother. On the basis of gender, she was not provided her fundamental right to live according to her will. This made her an outsider in the society, who would have to lead a life according to the anticipations of the society. If she wanted to come in the good books of the society, she would have to curb her desires, her inner self and pretend to be someone the society would easily accept. Robert Lebrun, a flirtatious man who was famous for hanging around with married women, “constitutes himself the devoted attendant of some fair dame or damsel,” enters Mrs. Pontellier’s life and changes her forever. (The Awakening Novel Summary) The writer has shown a close friendship between both, which was not an unusual custom in the Creole society. In fact, it was very common for Creole women to keep a relationship with another man apart from husband. But, this kind of relationship was different as there were open talks about sex but firm chastity in veracity. This kind of practice in the Creole society was hard to comprehend by any outsider and so Edna could not make out whether Robert was serious with her or not. This again confused her and left her with many questions unanswered in her mind and heart. Whenever Robert tried to cuddle her, she felt uncomfortable and would push him away from her. But later on, as her encounters with Robert increased, she wondered as to why she refused him to come close. She agreed to go to the beach with him and he taught her how to swim. This was her first step towards a free life, free of any restrictions and any expectations. Her awakening began from here. She discovered that she is an independent person and whatever she does affects people around her. (The Awakening And Far From The Heaven Essay) Every individual loves to be valued, appreciated and loved. “Families are fundamental to human existence and constitute the primary social group to which humans belong from birth.” Dejection by family is very hurting and painful. One feels left out. Usually, “rejection by significant individuals and social groups triggers a variety of maladaptive reactions, including depression, suicidal behavior, and violence.” This kind of reaction occurs in extreme cases and hence is uncommon. Some people react to “rejection in ways that compromise their well-being and relationships”, while others do not. (Sydney Symposium of Psychology) It was not normal for any outsider to react in a positive way as Edna did. She did not sacrifice herself for the society’s demands. Instead, she decided to choose her own way. If she wanted, she could have lead her life like Madame Ratignolle, a homely figure whose kids were fond of her. Even though Edna had been undergoing a great deal of misperception and chaos, she opened up to a world of opportunity, which was a positive change in her. Therefore, we can conclude to the point that Robert played an important role in helping Edna to overcome her loneliness and rejection by family and society. Earlier in the story, Edna had shown herself to be a reserved woman, who hardly shared her feelings with anyone, as we saw her open up a little for the first time to Madame Ratignolle, while walking on the beach. But later on in the story, we see that when Edna discovered that Robert was leaving for Mexico, she did not hesitate in displaying her shock and despair. She felt empty and isolated as Robert was the only one who gave her full attention and had a contented relationship with her. She failed to restrain her emotion in front of everyone. Unaware of the fact, that she had fallen for Robert, she only knew that she stays happy with him and that is why she felt miserable at his sudden departure. Edna, had now transformed into a new human being, who was no more scared of what others would think if she behaved in a certain way. She had broken out from the restraints of behaving like an outsider. Another figure in the novel that played the role of an outsider in the Creole society was Mademoiselle Reisz, who was unmarried and lived alone. She was a pianist and had been socially isolated by the society and was considered an eccentric, for her independent style of living. She could not do anything about it except for ignoring social constrictions, preventing people from coming to her and living at the peripheries of social respectability. She behaved rudely with all except for Edna. She was straightforward and played such melodies, which made Edna cry and made her realize how lonely she was as an outsider. It was Mademoiselle Reisz who made Edna realize that she was in love with Robert. She was the one who blended courage and strength in Edna, to face the society and live her life as she wanted. She, having lived her own life and pursued her own interests, tried to be an adviser and guide to a young and sensitive woman. Edna was encouraged to behave as she wanted with her family and husband. Her behavior changed drastically after Robert left. She was now least bothered about her husband and disobeyed him in every way she felt like. This was proved when one day at dining table, Mr. Pontellier complained about the food and the cook and got up without eating but, Mrs. Pontellier kept on enjoying her meal and she left after finishing her dinner which would not have been her normal behavior if it had been the earlier Edna. Edna had taken rebirth. Then onwards, on every stage, Edna rejected the rules and norms of the society and lived the way she wanted to. Her behavior had become recalcitrant. Edna started taking painting seriously, to keep herself employed in an activity. She found freedom in her painting instinct. By doing so, she followed the footsteps of her friend Mademoiselle Reisz of leading an artistic life, though she was also taking a risk by doing so, like her friend, she might also be called an “eccentric, neglecting society and being ostracized”. Edna was married and belonged to a high class family; therefore she might have been humored and at the same time, admired by people like Madame Ratignolle. Edna might have become like Madame Ratignolle, leading a domestic, dreamless life, if she would have not followed her instincts and had continued fulfilling the expectations and demands of the society. Edna could never have awakened and joined hands with world that lay beyond any restrictions, if Robert would not have given special attention to her and if she had not encountered the two entirely contrasting women in her life, Madame Ratignolle and Mademoiselle Reisz. (Chopin) We see that how the two outsiders were suppressed and controlled by the societies and what effect this had on them. One became an extremist and adopted a very rude and inhumane behavior with others, while the other adopted a middle way and struggled to acquire happiness in every person she met and in everything that she did. All Edna wanted after all the turmoil in her life was solitude, which she got when her husband went on his business affair and her children went to stay with their grandmother. She was all alone in the house, all by herself where she could ponder upon herself and discover who she was. Leading an unfulfilling married, life she had to resort to some other way of satisfying herself, thus started an affair with Arobin. A sexual affair, without any emotions attached to the person. She could no longer have this affair by staying at her husband’s house as she felt guilty, so she left her husband’s house and lived in a “pigeon house” with Arobin. (Kate Chopin's The Awakening & Mark Twain's Huckleberry Finn) One day Robert returned. He loved Edna but failed to admit it, as he was still abiding by the society’s rules that she was a married woman and that he must stay in his limits. Edna was the first one to approach Robert physically. She broke all the taboos and tried to have not just one, but two extra-marital affairs at the same time. She acted upon her sexual desires with pleasure and confidence and displayed no shame. It was very significant, that Edna declared that she was no longer a property of anyone. She rejected the traditional idea of marriage, that a wife becomes the property of her husband, declared her free from any kind of social pressure and freed herself from the chains of relationships and responsibility. She was absolutely free to do anything, to be anywhere to be with anyone when she said, “I give myself where I choose". (Chopin) The sweet, innocent housewife, who was always fully dressed, took off her clothes in the course of the novel, symbolizing that how she gradually became aware of herself; and started offending the rules and customs of the society. In the last scene of the novel Edna for the first time, was seen without clothes standing by the ocean. "But when she was there beside the sea, absolutely alone, she cast the unpleasant, pricking garments from her, and for the first time in her life she stood naked in the open air, at the mercy of the sun, the breeze that beat upon her, and the waves that invited her." This Edna was an entirely new human being, with new thoughts and respect for herself. She was "some new-born creature" at the end of her life.  “Edna destroyed herself, but paradoxically, she was also reclaiming her life.” Edna’s life was hers and she refused to sacrifice herself for anybody else. It was her power, to either destroy her life or live it as she wished. (Symbolism in Kate Chopin's The Awakening) At the end, we conclude with the answer to the question of how being an outsider affects a person. After studying Kate Chopin’s story “The Awakening”, we observe that there are three ways in which an outsider can be affected. One way is the way Mrs. Ratignolle leads her life. By accepting and adjusting with the society customs and conventions; and leading a dull life without any expectations or dreams. A person can be affected negatively as Mademoiselle Reisz was. A person can become extremely unfriendly and rude and live alone without any social contact. This may have a negative impact on the emotional and mental state of a person. The last way in which a person can be affected is how Mrs. Pontellier was affected. She wanted happiness and freedom which the society was refusing to give her. So she refused to live in such a society where her freedom was in a prison. She desired to be free from any responsibilities and any kind of social pressure, so she decided to give her self-up to the nature where she belonged. She realized that there was no place for her in the society she lived in. She ended up committing a suicide. Works Cited Chopin, Kate. “The Awakening Summary and Analysis”. gradesaver.com, Grade Saver. n.d. Web. 19 Apr. 2012. “Kate Chopin's The Awakening & Mark Twain's Huckleberry Finn”. jaymansfield.com, Jaymansfield. n.d. Web. 19 Apr. 2012. Sydney Symposium of Social Psychology. “The Social Outcast: Ostracism, Social Exclusion, Rejection, and Bullying”. psych.purdue.edu, SSSP. Mar. 2004. Web. 19 April. 2012. “Symbolism in Kate Chopin's The Awakening”. 123helpme.com, 123HelpMe. n.d. Web. 19 Apr. 2012. “The Awakening Novel Summary”. novelexplorer.com, Novel Summaries Analysis. n.d. Web. 19 Apr. 2012. “The Awakening And Far From Heaven Essay”. antiessays.com, Anti Essays. n.d. Web. 19 Apr. 2012. Read More