Love as an Important Aspect of Life - Essay Example

Stendhal on love Stendhal was a 19th century French who spent his time highlighting the role of love in families, societies and the nation as a whole. Raised by a single parent father because their mother died while he was still young, Stendhal spent his youthful life unhappy with his father while developing a strong affection for his dead mother. Though his romantic work was never appreciated during the time he lived, Stendhal opinion on love and affection has been used in different fields in the 20th and 21st century (Toker, 2014, p251). Stendhal contribution to the doctrine and field of love has remained controversial with some analyst arguing that his contribution is vague and difficult to point out. In this paper, the contribution of Stendhal towards love as a topic and a writing theme will be analyzed, judging his writings from the eyes of analysts and critics. In his book on love, Stendhal attempted to make a rational analysis of human emotions, feelings and attitudes towards each other. To make a complete analysis of love and the way it impacts on different people and leaders, Stendhal analyzed four main types of love. According to Stendhal, love can be categorized based on the individual feeling, impact it has on the people and the input that sustains it. Passionate love was initially developed by the Portuguese nuns according to Stendhal and exists between individuals, families and even social groupings. The bond that brings together families and members of a given society, religious group or even political grouping is associated with the passionate attraction that they develop through constant interaction. Families, for example, are determined to protect and provide for their members as a way of showing that their existence goes beyond a social grouping, but a manifestation of passionate love shared (Toker, 2014, p.251). On the other hand, mannered love has its origin in Paris and has been captured in different French memoirs and stories including those involving chamfer and lauzun. Artists have attempted to illustrate the mannered love using different tools including the rosy hues that have no spot to show negativity and ill feelings. Whatsoever is unpleasant in mannered love will result into a breach of the better taste and etiquette that has been developed from this kind of love (Foster, 2014, p311). Any individual who attempts to nurture such kinds of love must first ensure that the rituals and stages involved are observed and followed. According to Stendhal, Mannered love results into more intense satisfaction as compared to any other form of love because it is more refined, passionate and unpredictable as compared to other categories of love. Compared to passionate love that tends to carry those involved away into a fantasy love, mannered love as depicted by Stendhal is respectful to the interests of the people involved. However, Stendhal admits that in the absence of vanity, mannered love remains an empty shell of its own self that cannot be sustained in the face of poverty (Toker, 2014, p252). Acting in a manner that violates mannered love creates a dilemma for the parties involved and result into the development of an opposite feeling instead. Mannered love cares, appreciates and ensures that parties are equally involved according to Stendhal. It does not castigate or create tension in a way likely to hurt the people involved and stalk hatred among the parties. While compared with passionate love, manner love results into deeper satisfaction according to Stendhal and this arises from the fact that it is interested in pleasing all the parties involved as opposed to a one sided affair. Physical love according to Stendhal is the actual love the human beings experience when they meet pretty and well-mannered people that they want to spend their lives with. The pleasure of meeting a beautiful wife or husband personality while out on an individual mission results into the development of a spark that breeds the physical love as described by Stendhal (Foster, 2014, p 311). This love is common to teenagers who are beginning to develop a desire to be close to attractive people of the opposite sex and form a strong relationship. Vanity love is filled with the desire to have a fashionable individual, one that remains the desire of others around you. While describing vanity love, Stendhal epitomized the French society where vanity love dominates. In this situation, love is not more of a feeling, but a desire and a luxury that a young man wishes to possess. Filled with flattery and pique, vanity love leads many people to zests, as opposed to the desire to remain relevant and essential in the face of the society (Toker, 2014, p 251). According to Stendhal, falling in love is something beyond the will of the individual and does not make significant consideration of the perfection of the individuals involved. As a result, most people forms an imaginative perfection of the people they love to remain attached to them and remain in the relationship. To achieve this, Stendhal argues that cognitive abilities are essential in enabling an individual to understand the behaviors of others and remain form an imaginative perfection towards them. Whether passionate, vanity or manner lover, human understanding of relationship and cognition is critical in realizing the need for cohesive existence. Human understanding is not in a better position to discover the connection between distinct love among individuals; nonetheless, a little connection in mind does exist whenever our thoughts traverse from one person to the other. Therefore, this implies that our understanding of people around us cannot be used as a fingerprint to our personal feelings. Though some philosophers have attempted to trace the origin of love, they have over relied on human understanding of nature and its unique features to assist in the development of affection. However, tracing the development of human understanding of love and the feeling of attraction to other people exposes us to a mockery of ourselves. This is because the human mind is not satisfied by understanding the basic causes of the phenomena around them, but is programmed to push further until they understand the immediate cause (Toker 2014, p.251). The development of human understanding is a set of mind that custom creates the impression and understanding that one develops and adopts towards an object and it is usually in-born. Therefore, this implies that attaining satisfaction from a love relationship requires an understanding of nature objects. However, this can be quite frustrating based on our previous experiences with the passionate or mannered affectionate feelings. Clear understanding of an individual is characterized with a great level of imagination, which is a phenomenon that philosophers treat with a lot of caution. This is because it is prone to mistakes and other occurrences that are beyond the control of individual knowledge, an opportunity to end up in hurting situation. Most people end up living in regret following a love relationship that failed because they rushed into the affair and failed to understand the strengths and weaknesses of the others (Foster 2014, p.311). This leaves us without even the lowest level of confidence of our understanding and propositions. Hence, people save themselves from this emptiness by having a combination of love with consistent imagination. Therefore, it is acceptable that no refined or elaborate reasoning can be recognized without the effects of love. Therefore, refuting the impact that imagination has on human understanding leaves us with no reason at all or a false reason (Levinas, 1979, p.45). Confining ourselves only to matters of feelings leaves us greatly limited to our knowledge and understanding and this hampers our judgment of people around us. Past experience in love affairs teaches us a lot about the experiences and problems we have to encounter by entering into such relationships. However, there is no basis to suppose that past experience will mound our future approach to falling in love again and meeting new people that can increase our experiences. All our affectionate feelings arise from the small ideas that we develop towards the people we meet daily and the impression they leave on us. Therefore, this make feelings that we have and cherish emanate from the experiences we have been exposed to in our lives by loving other people, and in explaining this, Stendhal uses the concept of time, space and mathematics. An individual must experience a concept for it to have any meaning in their understanding; therefore, our feelings and/or impressions cannot be considered infinitely divisible (Whiting, 2013, p407). Stendhal makes a comparison of affectionate feeling between man and animal, as one that creates a bond which results into our societies and flocks in animals. This arises from the fact that animals and man have tangential similarities because they possess similar capacities and reasoning methods. Human beings are of the belief that their actions are guided by reason and design as opposed to that of animals and this makes their affectionate feelings distinct. However, when we see animals interact with each other, mourn their dead once and act in way likely to protect each other, it become evident that chemical attraction that causes love is common in both. Therefore, there is a striking resemblance in the feeling of animals towards each other and even towards man in the case of domesticated animals and man towards each other. Animals such as dogs are known to moan their masters and even spend hours next to their graves, a demonstration of the strong affection and love that bind them (Hunter, 2008, p45). Apart from the philosophical angle that Stendhal gives to the topic of love, he also illustrates the injustice that exists as a result of inequality in feelings. Despite the fact that an individual may have a strong affection and love feeling towards another person, it is impossible to make people feel in a similar manner, unless it occurs involuntarily. Ironically, this kind of unreciprocated love does not bring happiness or satisfaction but rather increases the feeling of pain and dejection. This feeling of pain does not just affect the lover, but also the individual that is loved but finds it difficult to reciprocate the same love. Stendhal argues that it is difficult to provide a logical reason to a person while you cannot love them in the same way they love you. Apart from the intrigues that arise due to love, Stendhal argues that romantic love has been a source of intrigues for moralist. As expressed in Kraus song, romantic love is self-expressing and goes beyond the pride of the parties involved. While penning his on love, the United States society was not in the mind of Stendhal per se, but his description of passionate love describes the society as we know it today. Stendhal argues that the United States is a society the love and happiness is attributed to the rationality, reason and passion of the individuals involved. Though critics have argued that his representation of love in America is not purely accurate, it is evident that he attempted to bring out the modern society through the eyes of love and affection. To demonstrate this position, Stendhal uses the cities of Florida and Washington DC where tourism has provided an opportunity for people from different parts of the globe to cement their feeling towards each other. Though his work demonstrated some level of cattiness especially when describing the United States, he has critically analyzed the charming ability of different cities in the country (Arsenic, 2013, p205). Stendhal has also described the relationship of love and age of the people involved by stating that love developed at an advanced age is richer and more fulfilling as compared to the young age. Old age love is enduring, mature and accommodative as compared to the young love that is still venturing and attempting to rediscover itself. For the young people, Stendhal argues that love is like a big river that seems to take almost everything along its way but is more turbulent and restless. Ladies in this age are more infatuated and develop a feeling that happiness and satisfaction come from love, a situation that does not actually happens due to the turbulent nature of the people. Love is a sublime that cannot actually be read in entirety but rather a feeling that only creates a full pack delightfulness that beats boundaries, time and embraces the universal human nature. To Stendhal, love does not make sense to the young though they are always perceived to be carried away by their feelings (Place 1979, p.42). In conclusion, according to Stendhal love has two conflicting sides that involve its great sensitivity and the coolly analytical aspect. In his great novel, Stendhal highlighted how love is an important aspect of life in which people with a blood bond and those who have never came together develop a strong affection and affiliation towards each other. Cognition helps us appreciate the basic effects that experience has on us and love alike. The development of love is independent of the environment, the people around and even the accompanying events. As demonstrated by Stendhal, love is a feeling, a desire and an affection that we develop as we grow up and interact with others. References Avsenik Nabergoj, I 2013, The Power Of Love And Guilt : Representations Of The Mother And Woman In The Literature Of Ivan Cankar, Frankfurt am Main: Peter Lang Hunter, A 2008, Signs of Reading and the Subject of Love in Stendhals De lamour, Nineteenth-Century French Studies, 3/4, p. 205. Foster, J 2014, Love across Borders in Hadji Murad: Variations on a Cross-Cultural Motif in Tolstoy, Stendhal, and D. H. Lawrence, Partial Answers, 12, 2, p. 311. Hunter, A 2011, Reading, Marks, Love: Rousseau, Stendhal, Baudelaire, Oxford Literary Review, 33, 1, p. 45. Place, D 1979, Stendhals Rhetoric of Love in Lucien Leuwen, Modern Language Review, 74, 1, pp. 39-48. Toker, L 2014, Love Conquers All: Introduction to the Forum "The Novel and Theories of Love", Partial Answers, 12, 2, p. 251. Levinas, E 1979, Totality and infinity: An essay on Exteriority, Springer Science & Business Media. Whiting, J 2013, Love: self-propagation, self-preservation, or ekstasis?’ Canadian Journal of Philosophy, 43, 4, pp. 403-429. Read More