Changes in the View of Attraction - Essay Example

Reflective paper on how our view of attraction changes Attraction is indeed a very complex phenomenon. It needs to be studied in a proper manner before one could delve further about the different ways and means attraction comes out as an entity in its own righteous way. Attraction happens instantly at times while at others it becomes a source of problem when it comes to its understanding. Attraction after all is a scientific ability of the mind to discern things and/or human beings and then to reflect the same feelings in positive aspects. It is also a fact that attraction might happen for an individual towards the target (the attracted entity) yet the other person might find it difficult to hold the same feelings. It is also possible that the other individual is repelled when it comes to the liking and disliking discussion. Speaking from a very spiritual perspective, it is up to the human beings as to how they see the basis of their life shaping up and what measures they enact in order to decide between the good and the bad, the virtue and the evil. It is also a known truth that evil seems to make home within the hearts of the human beings in a faster manner than goodness would do. (Author Unknown, 2006) This is because there is more attraction in going towards the evil and actually committing to it as compared to the good deeds that are also in abundance in this world. The difference is that good deeds make their way within our hearts in a slow but calming way. However it is also a known piece of information that virtue has its own way of reaching our hearts and just like water it chooses its own route, no matter how tough the barriers ought to be. Thus attraction is a very complex system to understand in the sheerest sense. As human beings age, they start developing feelings which they did not have in the past. Then again as they grow older, they start getting away from things they found attractive in the yesteryears. There are different comprehensions when it comes to getting aged. Age changes the different nuances of attraction and quite rightly so. With that the circumstances that take their toll on a person with the changing times and events, also shape up the manner under which his attractive intents are altered or amended. He might like a particular thing when he is a teenager but will laugh off the belief that he actually liked such a thing in the past, at a later stage. Experiences also shape up the way people perceive attraction. A grown up individual would most likely get attracted to intellect and knowledge while a teenager would go for looks and worldly possessions in a person. Therefore it would be right to deduce that attraction is a very complex phenomenon which has more levels of understanding within it than the human mind can even think of. Getting attracted to a person of the opposite gender is just one of the aspects that come under this debate. (Sprecher, 2002) Infatuation is one form of attraction that develops in a person when he sees someone from the opposite gender. He feels that this is some form of love which has come for his own good yet this is a short term phenomenon which takes over his mind and heart completely. He starts believing in the power of love but what he forgets is the fact that this is mere infatuation at the end of the day and nothing else. Infatuation, if continued for a long period of time could change into love but there are very less chances of this happening. Usually this fades away after a certain period of time. Attraction similarly is a phenomenon which fades off after the individual exhibits certain actions and/or behaviors which are not appreciated by the party which has the attraction button activated within his own personality. (Langford, 1999) These feelings can also change with the passage of considerable time, someone else entering into this person's life or any other reason. It would be correct to state that attraction is indeed a very diverse subject and needs to be broken into smaller sub-segments so that the understanding is drawn out from a host of avenues, one such being the attraction that exists between a man and a woman. Speaking from a purely love relationship; there is a need to have attraction within the nuptial knot so that the two individuals can go along in a nice manner towards the future. This would ensure success of their marriage and would also provide them happiness at the end of the day. Thus our view of attraction changes with time and the movement of events from one phase to another. Attraction levels never remain the same over an extended period of time and this is equally true in all ages and amongst everyone. The change within the attraction regimes takes place when the priorities within an individual start to alter. This is not necessarily something which could be remarked as a negative but it is all the more natural to have 'changed' feelings for an individual in one time frame and absolutely different in another. Human beings learn with experience and thus they also go through a lot of changes within their mind and their heart which makes them peculiar in their own right. The change is natural because human beings witness different alternatives and their viewpoints also start altering due to the distinctive events and happenings engulfing their respective lives. Attraction is a very vast topic and one that demands an incisive look into it - more so because attraction can create deadlocks within relationships as well. This happens when a person gets attracted to another individual and a third person does not know what exactly is happening between the earlier two. (Pines, 2000) Confusions arise and heart break comes into the equation as a result of the same. It is best advised to get attracted to someone when a person knows well enough about the other individual and whether or not the other person is already committed to someone else or plans to delay a commitment till a certain age and so on and so forth. But then again these are mere assumptions and just like pure love, attraction happens either instantly or over a period of time. Rest assured, attraction happens without much reason and rationale on one's side. Moving on in-depth with the realms of attraction, one finds that a person might not be attracted to an individual just because he likes the other person due to the physical looks. Attraction can happen because of one's intellect, his mindset, his peculiar approach towards a work task or even a gesture. It can just trigger a sort of loving attitude within the person who is attracted to another being without solid reason at his side. This person might find the other individual attractive because the attractive party is different and quite unique in his/her own right and then this could mean so much more with the changing events and happenings that take place on a consistent basis. Attraction is a very mind boggling phenomenon and is surely not in one's complete control. Understanding the power of attraction is like comprehending how one can fly an aircraft without first getting to know the basics of flying. However there is no such requirement to have a flyer's license because attraction can happen to anyone and at any time, without much reason. Being unreasonable actually helps the attraction to grow and this is one aspect that demands serious thought and purpose by the people who study attraction at all levels, barring nothing that comes under the umbrella of love and relationships. In the end, it would be wise to state that some things in life are better left unexposed. Attraction is one such entity which must not be explored to a greater level. One must go with the flow of attraction and explore what life brings for this person in the long run. However what he should consider is the fact that attraction can have long lasting consequences on one's mind and specific habits. (Hughes, 2003) These must be kept a check upon so that the problems do not hamper the smooth working regimes of a person, both from the personal perspective as well as the professional one. Suffice to say attraction will continue to make ripples within the lives of the people as long as there is love and attachment between the different people present in this world. Attraction is after all not just limited to the people around the world but also present amongst the scenic beauties, the flowers, the animals, the climate changes, the aura of art and music and so on. Attraction is a very free flowing feeling - a feeling that makes the heart grow pounder and the positive vibes having a field day, on a constant basis all along. References Author Unknown. (2006). Lessons in Love; Relationships Are Complicated and Rarely Go According to Plan. but We Can Learn from Those Who Have Messed Up. Here Four Women, Who Found out the Hard Way, Share Their Experiences. Newspaper article; The Mail on Sunday (London, England), August 27 Hughes, Zondra. (2003). What Brothers Really Want: In Women, Sex & Relationships. Ebony, Vol. 58, May Langford, Wendy. (1999). Revolutions of the Heart: Gender, Power, and the Delusions of Love. Routledge Pines, Ayala. (2000). Falling in Love: Why We Choose the Lovers We Choose. Routledge Sprecher, Susan. (2002). A Study of Men and Women from Different Sides of Earth to Determine If Men Are from Mars and Women Are from Venus in Their Beliefs about Love and Romantic Relationships. Sex Roles: A Journal of Research Word Count: 1,508 Read More