Healthy Grief Issues - Essay Example

Introduction Grief is considered as a normal human emotion and a natural response toward the losses we may suffer. Normally grief can occur when losea love one however, grieving can also occur as a result of different other episodes such as end of a relationship, moving to an unknown and unwelcoming community, illnesses which our loved ones can incur etc are some of the ways through which can experience grief. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross produced a model based on coping with the grief associated often with the dying and loss of life. Her model or framework is based upon the five stages of the grief and outline as to how people actually cope with the grief and tragedy. Her work was specially linked with the dying as well as diagnosis of life threatening diseases which could put a person in grief and create a sense of loss. (Kurian, 2009) The five stages of grief, according to this model, include denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. At each stage, an individual experiences grief over the period of time however, it is not necessary that the same stages may occur in sequential manner and every person facing a given situation may pass through this. (Kubler-Ross, 1969) The book of Job or Job outlines the story of Job who also went through the grief of losing the possessions and was tested by Satan. This paper will first discuss the five stages model and relate this with the story of Jobs as described in Bible by making a comparison and contrast table. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross Model According to this model, persons facing a dying situation may go through five different stages of the grief. However, it is not necessary that everyone must go through the same cycle in same order or experience the same stages of grief at all. According to this model, the five stages of grief are: 1. Denial- this is the first stage where an individual often feels that he is fine and nothing can be done to him. This stage is considered as a temporary defense for an individual and can be replaced with the awareness about the possessions of an individual as well as individuals who will be left behind after the death. 2. Anger is a stage where a person specifically starts to believe as to why he or she is the victim of any illness or grief. This is an stage where an individual actually realizes that denial can no longer work and can often become unmanageable because of misplaced feelings of rage and fury. 3. Bargaining stage is reached when an individual starts to believe that he or she can actually bargain to gain more time to delay the death. It is often argued that it is at this stage where a person fully understands that he cannot avert death but can bargain by altering the life style to negotiate with the higher power. 4. Depression is the stage where an individual actually starts to become certain that his death will occur and as such the person often goes into solitude. It is at this stage that the individual starts to withdraw from the things and is considered as the important stage of grieving. 5. Acceptance is the last stage where individual actually realizes the mortality of his own or the loved ones. It is at this stage that the individual consciously accepts the inevitable and becomes fully aware that death will be certain and it can happen any time. Story of Job One of the key elements of the story of Job as described in the book of Job is the importance of remaining with a grieving person and using the grief to actually relieve a person’s discomfort. The story of the Job is a story of a wealthy, healthy and uprighteous person who suddenly lost his family, his possessions as well as his health. The visiting of Job’s friends during this period seem to have provided an insight into how the sharing of the grief can actually help to reduce the discomfort of the persons experiencing the grief. (Lyon, 2000) His story is a typical story of how the loss of valuables and possessions can actually create a psychological pressure on a pious individual to even curse the God. A closer analysis of the story of the Job and the model discussed above can clearly establish a link between the two. We can actually describe different cycles of grief as described by the model and relate it with the story of Job. Comparison and Contrast Stages Comparison Contrast Denial Job early on denied the existence of any grief and attempted to link his grief as something inflicted by God. Job therefore seems to have shown the same level of denial early on when attempted to withstand his grief by linking it with God. Anger Job also showed his anger when he said “ I shall speak with Anguish of my spirit” Job however is still seems to have strong faith in God and still believes that everything happens from God for certain reason. He however, never complains to God. Bargaining Job also attempted to bargain with God when he said “ If there is someone who can arbitrate between us” Job however does not seem to show his shock at the overall happenings in his life. Depression Job easily went into depression when he said why he didn’t die when he was being born. This clearly shows the depression of the Job on whatever happened in his life. The source of Job’s depression however was his wife who forced him to curse God thus Job was not directly in the depression state but was rather forced by others to go in this state of depression and grief. Acceptance Finally Job accepts that there are things which he cannot control and thus effectively surrender to what is happening in his life. Job however seems to move between different stages at the same time. This suggests that Job may not be showing characteristics particular to any given stage at the same time. Bibliography Kubler-Ross. (1969). On Death and Dying. New York: Macmillan. Kurian, D. G. (2009, August). Healthy Grieving - Does Faith Matter? Retrieved November 05, 2011, from Counselor: http://www.counselormagazine.com/columns-mainmenu-55/90-spirituality/946-healthy-grieving-does-faith-matter Lyon, D. S. (2000). Before Kubler-Ross: Lessons About Grief From the Book of Job. Obstetrics & Gynecology:, 96(1), 151-152. Read More