Hindu Marriage Customs and Beliefs - Research Paper Example

?Marriage in Hinduism: Hinduism considers the marriage or vivah as a sacred relationship between two individuals. This relationship does not end withlife. The relationship sustains for seven lives an individual gains. In each of these lives, the couple makes spiritual progress with each other’s help. Hinduism supports the cliche that marriages are decided in heaven. The fact that their karmas are intertwined makes two souls get closer. Their mutual salvation depends upon the level to which they resolve their issues in the life on earth. The relationship that a couple enjoys is not limited to their physical beings. It is essentially the way in which souls of the life partners are related. In a Hindu marriage, the two partners may exchange their respective roles as per the demand of the situation i.e. a husband may play the role of a wife and vice versa. Occasionally, the two partners part ways for some time until they are reunited after a life or two. The three fundamental objectives of a Hindu marriage in the right order are “dharma, praja (progeny) and rati (pleasure)” (Sociology Guide, 2011). Marriage in Hinduism is not only a dharma i.e. an obligation but is also the samskara i.e. sacrament. Every Hindu should marry unless he/she has adopted the lifestyle of a sanyasi. “It is an essential aspect of the four ashramas (brahmacharya, grihastha, vanaprastha and sanyasa) and the four aims (purusharthas) of human life, namely, dharma, artha (wealth), kama (sensuous pleasures ) and moksha (salvation)” (Jayaram, 2010). Her life as a maiden terminates as a Hindu woman enters into a marital relationship. After marriage, the girl has to live with her in-laws in their home and leave the parents’ home. The relationship with parents after marriage becomes minimal and quite formal. Accordingly, many Hindu women become mentally disturbed until they completely accept and are completely accepted by the husband as well as his family. In its early stages, the marriage can both make and break. The early days in the husband’s home hold a special significance to the bride because the impression she casts upon the in-laws in these days remains associated with her throughout the life. Marriage in Hinduism can be classified into five types ranging from the traditional arranged marriages to forced marriages. In a vast majority of cases, marriage takes place with due consent of the bride, the groom and their relatives. Factors that are of primary importance in case of the arranged marriages in Hinduism include but are not limited to the natal charts, caste, gotra i.e. kinship, financial status, looks, and character. Marriages between cousins may or may not be a norm depending upon the region. In Southern India, it is normal for an individual to marry a cousin. In ancient times, a widowed Hindu woman was allowed to marry the brother of the deceased husband because of progeny. In olden days, polygamy was common in Hindus but it is almost non-existent in the contemporary Hindu society. There has been an increase in love marriages among Hindus over the passage of time, though their acceptability depends upon the caste, financial status and several other factors discussed before. Couples that break the norms and marry without due consideration to caste have to bear social pressure both within and outside the family. However, as more and more people are getting education in the urban setting, they have started to become liberal which is the fundamental cause of increase in the love marriages among Hindus. The dowry system is a potential evil of the Hindu marriage. Quite often, the bridegroom and his relatives demand dowry worth millions of dollars irrespective of the financial status of the bride’s parents. In a male dominated society, such people take marriage for an event in which they can cash the fact that they parent a man. If the bride’s family can not come up to their expectations regarding dowry, the mother-in-law and the husband subject the bride to numerous hardships and may even burn her to death. Although strict laws are in place in the Indian judiciary system for such criminal acts, yet the cases take decades to solve and the guilty often manage to escape the punishment. In an attempt to satisfy the greed of the bridegroom and his relatives, the bride’s parents often become financial indebted. The arranged marriages take place with a lot of formalities. A Vedic priest who knows the Vedic mantras presides the ceremonies and establishes the date of marriage after an in-depth analysis of the astrological charts. Once the wedding date has been decided, the parties involved send cards to invite the guests. Parents of the bride and the bridegroom exchange gifts before marriage. On the wedding day, all guests and relatives assemble in the premises of a temple or an auditorium and let the priest conduct the ceremony. The marriages may also be arranged in-house. The bridegroom wears are turban on the head and usually wears white dhoti while the bride is dressed in embroidered saree covered with malas. The relatives, particularly of the bride usually wear pink turbans on their heads. The marriage ceremony takes considerable time. During the ceremony, the priest recites many vedic mantras. Some people arrange bands that keep playing in the background. The guests are offered meal. Some communities may serve meat and liquor at the wedding, but they are generally avoided. The ceremony is brought to an end with the bridegroom tying a mangalsutram i.e. a sacred thread or a garland around the neck of the bride. The mangalsutram is tied in three knots. After tying that, the bridegroom says, “Let all the learned persons present here know, we are accepting each other willingly, voluntarily and pleasantly. Our hearts are concordant and united like waters” (Prinja, 2009). The bride then rubs sandlewood against the forehead of the bridegroom and the groom in turn applies the suhag i.e. red powder mark upon the forehead of the bride that is there to stay till the end of their marriage i.e. till death or divorce (Ariza, 2010). The bridegroom then takes the bride’s hand in his hand and guides her to the fireplace where they are supposed to make seven circles around the fire. These circles are of huge significance in a Hindu marriage and each of the seven circles signifies a unique virtue. They make vows of lifelong loyalty, sincerity, righteousness and friendship. During the nuptial ceremony in a Vedic marriage, both the bride and the bridegroom take oath for the practice of self-restraint, to work together for the welfare of the family and to help each other to attain spiritual peace. This lofty ideal of sanctity is a great gift of Hinduism to the world at large. (Rajhans, 2011). According to Ariza (2010), while moving in a circular fashion around the sacred fire, the couple makes the following seven pledges in the seven respective circles: 1. To earn for the family and give due respect to the abundance 2. To adopt healthy ways of living for each other’s sake 3. To pray for the welfare of the life partner 4. To be friends with each other throughout the life 5. To dine with each other and accompany each other on events 6. To wish for progeny and be responsible towards them 7. To adjust oneself according to the other Once this is done, they commence certain games with a view to lightening the atmosphere and enjoying themselves. These games are followed by many rituals. Both the bride and the bridegroom are given a bath at their parents’ home on or one day before the wedding day. In that session, they get their nails polished, and get turmeric rubbed against their skin. Turmeric is believed to fair their complexion and enhance their looks on the wedding day. The bride also gets her hands and feet covered with henna. On the wedding day, the sister or sisters of the bride hide the shoe of the groom and demand compensation for the shoe which is often much more than what several pairs of such shoes would cost. The groom bargains the price of the shoe with the sisters of the bride and after much hassle, the shoe is returned to the groom in exchange of the sum mutually consented through the lengthy bargaining session. The rituals continue till they reach the point of bidai. This is the point in time when the bride wishes good-bye to her parents and leaves their home. This is the most sentimental moment in a Hindu marriage and it is quite normal for the parents as well as for the bride to burst into tears. With heavy heart, the bride departs her parents and is taken by her in-laws to the new home. The rituals commence once again. The bride sets the print of henna on her hands against the wall before entering the home and kicks a pot of rice while entering the door of the groom’s home. After a few rituals at the groom’s place, the wedding ceremony comes to an end. References: Ariza, K. (2010). Hindu Marriage Customs and Beliefs. Retrieved from http://www.weddingzone.net/px-tr005.htm. Jayaram, V. (2010). Hinduism and Marriage. Retrieved from http://www.hinduwebsite.com/hinduism/h_marriage.asp. Prinja, N. K. (2009). Hindu Weddings. Retrieved from http://www.bbc.co.uk/religion/religions/hinduism/ritesrituals/weddings.shtml. Rajhans, G. (2011). Ideals of Hindu Marriage: Why the Hindu Marriage is Sacrosanct. Retrieved from http://hinduism.about.com/od/matrimonial1/a/idealsofmarriage.htm. Sociology Guide. (2011). Marriage in Hinduism. Retrieved from http://www.sociologyguide.com/indian-society/marriage-in-hinduism.php. Read More