The Analysis of World Statistics on Divorce - Research Paper Example

OUTLINE DIVORCE (SHOULD WE REFORM LAWS TO MAKE IT HARDER TO GET A DIVORCE I. INTRODUCTION II. NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE ON CHILDREN A. Short termoutcomes B. Long term effects III. NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE ON FAMILY A. Out of wedlock births B. Psychological disturbance that affect adjustment IV. NEGATIVE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE ON COMMUNITY V. SHOULD LAWS BECOME HARDER ON GETTING DIVORCE? VI. POSITIVE EFFECTS OF DIVORCE AND LAW VII. CONCLUSION Name Instructor’s Name Course 11 February 2013 Divorce (Should We Reform Laws to make it Harder to Get a Divorce?) Introduction The analysis of world statistics on divorce indicates an increasing rate of marriage dissolutions on numerous individual nations. Divorce has become rampant in this modern society than it was before in the olden times; both the newly married (young couples), young families, old families, and other couples are struggling to keep their marriage stable, despite of the numerous differences and challenges they experience. According to Ritzer and Ryan, the second half of 20th century can be characterized by increased divorce rates in most industrialized countries (157). However, there seems to be great differences in divorce activities among countries, due to variation in law. Historically, the divorce rate has been low in most of the Muslim countries, probably because of the traditional systems of organized marriages and polygamy. Despite of all these efforts, the divorce rates have soared in most of these countries as Women rebel their culture, and engage in businesses across the globe. There are various reasons attributed to cause divorce, ranging from economic and social factors among others. Over the past one decade, people have blamed economic inflations and recession, infidelity, domestic abuse, unusual close attachment to biological family, communication problems, lifestyle incompatibility, and failure to reach expectations among others. As a result, in the aftermath, it affects the families, children, and the communities, not only in the physical aspects, but also psychologically. Hence those seeking divorce and the law offering it should be mindful of its negative consequences. Negative effects of divorce on children Short term outcomes: These effects could develop in the process or immediately after the parents’ separation, probably in first two years. Some could occur and end completely, but others could keep reappearing based on the situations the children are engage in. First of all, there are those kids who feel responsible for their parents divorce, therefore, the guilt they have separates them from their parents, not knowing how to resolve the situation. Normally, the children who are always making their parents argue due to their irresponsibility or violence in their past, get to feel so. Remember the children’s personalities differ; hence as some feel guilty, others develop anger and resentment towards their parents for breaking up (“Effects of Divorce,” separation.ca). It is good to understand that children have different needs and in the surfacing of a divorce, they fail to understand why the two grown ups cannot resolve their problems. The children fear the future situations and how their needs would be met. Some develop an identity of association that gives them pride, which could be cut off in the separation event. Sometimes, they become extremely aggressive and violent, such that cooperation with the divorced parents, friends, and teachers could be impossible (“Effects of Divorce,” separation.ca). One would expect this because, all any child wants is to see his parents live together just like other children’s families. Therefore, for them to express it in words is difficult and the only way is through their behavior. In some rare cases, children, some old enough, get to behave like little kids as they seek comfort to fill the vacuum of the separated guardian. According to Jacobs, some children will revert back to wetting beds, sucking thumb, playing with dolls/toys (divorceministry4kids.com). The effect is due to the fear development, a point that they feel abandoned and have no choice but to express their emotional needs. Due to the separation, the parents’ efforts do not seem to fulfill the requirements of their children, simply because they were used to sharing responsibilities. Hence getting the children to do various chores after divorce becomes a burden for them. Matthews mentions about the less parental supervision, consistent discipline, and the lower self concept (3). Taking care of the kids is not easy, especially if they are very young and need constant supervision; hence chances that the kids could have accidents, or get ill due to lack of enough care as the custodian attends to other tasks are high. Similarly, the one left in charge of the child could be very tender or undisciplined to influence the child’s conduct. Generally, most of these outcomes are because of the psychological impacts on the children, and if one is keen to realize, apart from their physical reactions, depression, confusion, intense stress, decline in concentration affecting performance, and devastated emotions can be noticed. Long term effects: Depending on the coping abilities of the children, some do not get to experience these effects. Those who fail to adjust to the new life make it possible for some short term effects to develop into serious cases that affect them psychologically, even in their older lives. The similar problem of divorce could even reoccur in their marriage, due to the early dissolutions in their parent’s marriages. Some psychologists believe that the coping could vary depending on the age, effort applied, will, and even gender. According to Miller, in a study focused on youths, conducted by Huurre et al, it was found that females from divorced families reported more psychological problems and interpersonal struggles, compared to male individuals from divorced families and peers of similar age group, but from non divorced units (189). This could strain their romantic relations in their youth, or cause repeated split ups in their courtship period. The effect could also be from the developed anti-social behaviors and conduct disorders that end up causing conflicts and disengagements from the surrounding people. Some adults feel less satisfied in life, and even think the turn out of their lives could have been better if the annulment never occurred; unintentionally passing the blame to their split parents. According to Matthews, in their adulthood, the children could have earlier sexual intercourse or fear commitment and intimacy, probably experience less contact and affection in the relationships with their parents, and the girls could get married early or have children before marriage (4). These are the bitter results that the parents could have to blame themselves about. Similarly because of the difficulties of the parents to sustain their children educational needs, children may end up being less educated, risking the chances of getting low socio-economic attainments. When the divorced parents lack proper plans and support to enroll their children in high schools, colleges, or special education required, either the children would be socially marginalized, adopt illegal behaviors, or end up in low occupational attainments characterized by low wages, effectively leading to a decline in economic stability or poverty; a social economic disadvantage in their adulthood (Martin, Volkmar, and Lewis 1007). A look at the past educational and occupational performance of children from divorced parents depending on the family structure, with some being raised up by single parents the children exhibit low achievements in life. Referring to Biblarz and Raftery, the children from step and single-father families have consistently demonstrated lower achievements, compared to those from single-mother families or two-biological-parent (321). Some factors experienced in the short term like low self esteem, feeling of sorrow, and wishful thought could persist into their older lives too. Negative effects of divorce on family Out of wedlock births: When the divorced parties are young, the tendency to be remarried are quite high than for older couples. As a result, some end up in new homes with their children to merge with another family; else they leave their children with the other partners to seek a new life. Other groups of divorcees opt to live their free life and bear the consequences alone. Bringing up of children by a single parent is the immediate effect of most divorce, and acquiring new family members (stepparent and siblings) could occur after time. Either way, other children could be born immediately after divorce welcomed into the world’s broken families, or the divorced women could give birth outside marriage. Some of these couples opt for cohabitation and other extramarital affairs leading to an increase in the birth of children from divorcees. As of 2010, the EU countries recorded a 38. 3 percent of children born outside marriages, extra marital births having risen in the recent years and accounting for the 59.7 percent of births in Estonia in 2011 (“Marriage,” europa.eu). This indicates the relationship between divorce and increase in number of children born out of matrimony. Similarly, children conceived during marriage, but born after divorce are considered as out of wedlock, though the fathers have rights over the children too. However, depending on the situation, if the woman remarried, the father could end up loosing attachments with their children right from a young age. This is because at times, the parents would consider raising the kids in complete families and effectively, thus the father or the non-custodian ends up losing connections to the child. Psychological disturbance that affect adjustment: Embracing the changes for any member of the family is a period accompanied with confusion and emotional conflicts within oneself. Children could be confused about the person to follow or trust in the situation; the family relations tend to bend, and if not corrected, could stay like that forever. Some family members loose communication almost entirely and hardly get to see each other, unless it is a needy circumstance. For the parents, the psychological issues of instability and future uncertainties, insecurity, and abandonment could lead to suicide, depression, denial, hatred, future inabilities to trust another partner, and mood disturbances. Most of the custodian women go through greater hardships, ranging from low income flow, self doubt, and anger which might be directed to their children through the less affectionate nature and communication, and perhaps more punishments than before (Rocky Mountain Family Council 2-3). The economic problems could result in the income for women dropping lower than that of men, if they are less educated and have the responsibility of the children. There are also negative attitudes towards a divorced person and family in the communities’ context. Men could also suffer from social exclusion, loneliness especially if denied custodial visits, to extents of suicide or premature deaths, due to quick health attacks. At times, the children are abused by the stepparents or siblings, when one of the parents has ended up in another marriage. If the divorced parents are in constant conflicts and cannot solve issues amicably, the children themselves have difficulty in the adjusting process. Negative effects of divorce on community As much as the divorced couple could view it as private or personal issue, sometimes the consequences afterwards could spill on the public domain. Consider a situation where there is no organized educational support for the children, obviously, the custodian parent would utilize his resources including savings to boost the children’s welfare as far as it goes. Often, the income is too little and chances of falling into poverty are high. To be able to sustain the prior standard of living, the parents could need financial assistance and other social benefits. According to Waite and Gallagher, when such divorced partners fall into poverty, they usually have to depend on government programs, services, and supports to maintain their lives and families, all of which are financed with taxes (112). They could end up receiving tax credits, family and children assistance in educational, health, and nutritional areas among other grants, paid by taxpayer money that could have been invested in other developmental areas. Following the division of property, a parent and his or her children could end up being homeless; it could be because they cannot afford to pay for the house bills or the mortgage, at times for certain reason the child support is withheld, or probably because the guardians loose their jobs in the midst of the psychological effects. This increases the number of homeless families in the society and where parents lose jobs due to the traumas, the society and employers loose productive human resource. It could be easy for the children or the parents to engage in illegal activities when they are homeless or have little supervision. The governments invest huge resources of taxpayers’ money to combat crime from countries; chances of children from divorced families getting involved in such crime and deviant behavior after parents separation are high (Waite and Gallagher 112). Dropping out of school increases the number of loitering youths, who tend to join gangs in the streets to execute criminal activities in the society. Stealing from the neighborhood, engaging in drugs, or even prostitution could be no big deal; as long as their needs are met, life has to proceed (Rahimi, Shakarbigi, and Naderi 4640). If the children are abandoned while young, the community organizations like children’s home or the well wishers have to step in and adopt the children. In association to the above, the increase of births outside marriage, development of half sibling families, which includes children being brought up in different family backgrounds risk chances of abuse and society’s moral decay. The divorced family could also alienate itself from active participation of community service, due to shame or guilt. Should laws become harder on getting divorce? The laws of different nations differ and so do the laws on divorce. Marriage itself could be achieved through church, civil, or customary means; these differences could pose a great variation when it comes to divorce and sustaining of the marriage. At the end of the day, the governments and their laws hold the final word, and depending on the flexibility of the law, the divorce is granted even for minute reasons that could be solved domestically. Before the couples get married, they need to understand the constitution of marriage and its consequences in future. There are numerous reasons that drive the individuals to seek divorce; some could have developed initial intentions based on material gains or causing harm. Such cases could need more attention from the court to understand the situation with genuinely. In such situations, the laws need reforms to make it harder, or even delay the hearings to discourage the marriage annulment. Special circumstances of abuse and violence demonstrated with substantial evidence should be the only exceptions; otherwise the divorces will continue to be cyclic, as well as the damages they cause. The governments could make changes in the legal codes to enforce and stabilize marriages; some policies could be encouraging couples to participate in premarital counseling and even during marriage. Through the law, the penalties depending on the situation could be raised higher, and limit the number of divorces or marriages among others. The United States has been considering reforming laws to preserve the marriages, through family courts (Israelsen-Hartley deseretnews.com). Some nations prefer to present change step by step and monitor the effect; Wales and England are also considering certain reforms. However, reforming such marriage and divorce laws could vary on individual countries and their religions. Positive Effects of Divorce and Law Apparently, the concept and consequences of divorce are not always negative. For situations where the marriage was characterized with domestic violence against spouses, if the marriage never ended, the destructive images and pictures of violence in the victim and the children could always be available. Hence, the divorce helps them to lead a new life away from violence and physical injuries. Perhaps, the children could learn to cope and forgive the parents in a more secure and peaceful environment. As the children face the reality of life at an early age after their parents separation, their personalities and characters are shaped, which could make them more responsible, able to cope with difficult experiences in future, be motivated to succeed in social and economic status, and sensitive to identify with other people in such situations (Jaarsveld 63-64). Some divorce procedures involving well organized mediation allow smooth transitions into a new life, without conflicts and communication breakdown between the family members. For the young children taken into new families when their parents remarry or cohabit, there is a benefit of improving the children’s long term well being, considering less chances of being uneducated, less care, or their parent suffering from poverty (Amato 79). The children who had been subjects of mistreatments and sexual abuse are freed from the abusive parents to recuperate in a better environment. The married couples who never seem to cope with each other’s lifestyle are set free to life early in marriage or after years of perseverance. Conclusion The impacts of divorce are numerous and damaging to the family members and the entire society ranging from psychological, social, and economical aspects. The partners seeking it and the law enforcers seeking to justify it should investigate the impacts it would cause to people in general, especially the children involved and whether there exists reasonable causes for it to be granted. Otherwise, even minute issues that could be solved domestically and amicably could end up causing the divorce. The children that stand between divorced couples and psychological damage could be severe and lead to various kinds of trauma experienced in the long run. They are powerless in the situation, especially when young and their best interest should be considered. The community and the separating are also affected from the annulment consequences, and could arise in form of responsibilities overburdened on one group, or states of alienation, homelessness, and wrong image perception in the society. Although there are exceptional cases, such as in violence and abuse where the divorce could be encouraged for the positive effects it could cause, most of the other situations could be solved through mediation procedures, before resorting to the court for divorce options. Divorce laws need to be reformed to encourage the society and families preserve their marriages, and avoid conflicts that would risk harming the general community besides their family members. Works Cited Amato, P. R. “The Impact of Family Formation Change on the Cognitive, Social, and Emotional Biblarz, T. J., and Raftery, A. E. “Family Structure, Educational Attainment, and Socioeconomic Success: Rethinking the “Pathology of Matriarchy”.” AJS 105. 2 (September 1999): 321–65. Web. 11 February, 2013. Israelsen-Hartley, S. “Reforming Divorce: Changing Laws to Preserve Families.” deseretnews.com .14 July, 2012. Web. 11 February, 2013. Jaarsveld, A. W. V. “Divorce and Children in Middle Childhood: Parent’s Contribution to Minimise the Impact.” up.ac.za. April 2007. Web. 11. February, 2013. Jacobs, L.R. “Understanding the Long Term Legacy of Divorce.” divorceministry4kids.com .19 August, 2011. Web. 11 February, 2013 Martin, A., Volkmar, F. R., and Lewis M. Lewiss Child and Adolescent Psychiatry: A Comprehensive Textbook. 4th ed. Philadelphia, PA:Walters Kluwer|Lippincott Williams &Wilkins, 2007. Print. “Marriage and Divorce Statistics.” europa.eu. October, 2012. Web. 11 February, 2013. Matthew, W. “Long Term Effects of Divorce on Children.” ncsu.edu. n.d. Web. 11 February, 2013 Miller, T. W., ed. Handbook of Stressful Transitions across the Lifespan. New York, NY: Springer publishers, 2010. Print. Rahimi, S. A., Shakarbigi, A. R., and Naderi G. “Phenomena Effects of Divorce on Families and Society.” J. Basic. Appl. Sci. Res., 2(5)4639-4647, 2012. Web. 11 February, 2013 Ritzer, G., and Ryan, J. M., eds. The Concise Encyclopedia of Sociology. West Sussex: Blackwell publishing Ltd, 2011. Print. Rocky Mountain Family Council. “The Grass isn’t Greener: the Damaging effects of Divorce.” n.d. Web. 11 February, 2013. Waite, L. J., and Gallagher, M. “What are the Possible Financial consequences of Divorce?” n.d.Web. 11 February, 2013. Well-Being of the Next Generation.” The Future of Children15.2 (2005): 75-96. Web. 11. February, 2013. Read More