The Music of My Name: Fualole's Song - Essay Example

1. Fualole Gaston December 9 2006 Fualole's Song A person I do not know very well recently told me I have a beautiful they said it sounds like the music of a children's song that makes people smile. It is straight and simple, joyous and strong. I would like to think that this describes me as a person, I believe I am someone who lives up to the music of my name. It was not always that way, because life's journey brings so much change; I am not who I was ten years ago. Because of joining the army, having my children, falling in love and marrying my husband, I have grown and changed. I need to go back ten years to explained what has happened to bring about the changes in me. I joined the military at the age of eighteen and also had my first baby at that young age. These two events I think of as my first steps to growing up. Before then, I worked in McDonald's. Everybody sees the yellow arch, the red and yellow surroundings, the fast food and maybe the smile but not the person who works there. I might just have been anyone saying "Enjoy your meal" or "Have a nice day." I was, and still am, bubbly, friendly and outgoing, but wanted and needed more. My family could not afford to send me to college, but I wanted to extend myself, to learn more, to find out what I could achieve and who I was. But at that time, my life was fun, I was a kid. I saw the army as an opportunity to do something better. Early experiences of army life were a whole other world, one in which perfection and discipline ruled. Beds with sheets like fresh fallen snow, boots black and shining as tar. Obedience to rules, aching limbs and heavy backpacks, the tools that built physical and mental strength. Best of all was the sense of belonging, the teamwork and the realization that what I did mattered to others, my contribution was valued by my officers, company, division, regiment and country. In a short space of time, I was achieving a wider 2. vision and understanding of myself and my place in this military world. I was becoming less selfish and more self-aware. But even these exciting discoveries could not compare to giving birth to my beautiful baby. If blood, sweat and tears were put together, then that goes a little way to explaining the experience. The tears were of joy, at such an accomplishment, at creating a life. Labor was nothing anyone could have prepared me for - the pain, volcanic at times, pushing and forcing me towards the hope of a prize. At eighteen years old, I had my first understanding of the meaning of unconditional love, the beginning of mature responsibility. Nothing since has ever quite matched that experience, which made me more aware of the cycle of life and also, how important it was for me to try to be the best for somebody I loved, who depended on me. A squally scrap of humanity captured my heart and opened my mind. It was no longer just about me, I had to sing a different tune now. In reflecting on myself, I looked at how I was before I took steps to better myself. Even as a young person, I worked hard and did my best in my job. I saw that I also liked to play hard, have fun with my friends, maybe argue with my parents, and in truth, I did not care too much, so long as I had the money to enjoy myself and not to worry about responsibilities. I did not look further than having fun and getting along with everyone. At the same time, I was becoming more aware that I could maybe do better. I knew I was good with people, could always empathize and communicate and that I had a strong will and values around hard work and striving to improve. These parts of me made me search for a way to grow and better myself in life, while searching for independence. They are what made me join the military, which as I said earlier, moved me a little further along the road to becoming a mature and independent woman, not a thoughtless girl, just drifting through life. Now I believe, I have reached that maturity and independence. I think for myself, I enjoy the responsibility and commitment to people other than just me, and I take care to do things 8. that make me happy. Time spent with friends, family, colleagues, going to the gym, listening to my music, mean that I am a better wife, mother and friend. I no longer just go from day to day with only my own needs in mind; I work hard for my family and the army, doing the best job I am able to do, no matter what is asked of me. Now I believe it is not just about getting a pay check, but also about bringing my skills and personality to all I do. I think I was twenty four years old, married and with three children before I accepted my value as a person and my strengths and beliefs. I think hard about what matters to me and what I want to teach my kids; honesty and respect for others' and their rights and property, being true to yourself, doing your best, always. I do not think my younger self, ten years or so ago, would have been too concerned about any of this. But now, I can do whatever is needed to support others. My confidence and self-awareness have grown so that I am strong enough to look at myself, see what is good and what needs improvement. I have the wisdom and good sense to build on my strengths, values and self belief. Had I decided that only the army was to be my life, then I would have missed out on the great life experiences of love, marriage, children and all the simple and important little things, like just enjoying playing with the kids. Instead, I have balanced them all, to create a harmony, which is not always easy to do, but I know I will keep trying. Today, I have four great children and a good man to share my life with. I have a job which allows me to learn and develop my skills and offers me the opportunities to go further. I have many friends and enjoy living, despite it sometimes being hard, but I know I can do it, I have proved it to myself over and over. My reflections have shown me that this is the truth. But the changes are down to the love and support of my husband, family and fellow soldiers. All these parts of my life, blended together, are what have helped me to change to a better person. I understand that it is not enough to sit back and accept what life throws at me, I have to get in there and grab it, taking all that happens and making it work for me and mine. Though I recognize that all these life-changing experiences have helped me grow and improve, I also give 4. myself some credit here too. There is in me a core of strength, yet flexibility, a willingness to seek the positive and find joy in the little things, without compromising my honesty. There is also hope for the future, a belief that I control my own destiny and that I have the power to do so. A little rippling stream can sing its way over jagged rocks and eventually make them smooth; I am that ripple, that gentle, powerful little song. Fualole is more than able to carry the tune, she has a great supporting choir. Expected Grade: I am expecting an A or B, with a mark between 90 - 100%. This is because I have done all the homework, have been doing well all through the course. I also completed all four requirement papers, getting mostly good feedback. With this final exam paper, I have looked deeply into myself and been very honest in sharing my thoughts and feelings. I am hoping this will definitely help me towards that A or B grade. Read More