Utilization of Helping Theories in Counselling - Essay Example

Utilization of helping theories in counselling

Introduction

Helping is one of those words taken for granted because of its simplicity and familiarity of the vocabulary. Usually, those in social, educational or support fields are automatically taken as the “helping” professionals. However, the meaning of helping is not always obvious and pegs the question “who need help?” The qualities looked for in deciding whether a person qualifies as a helping professional or not is based on some established theories. For instance, in counselling, the counselor automatically assumes the role of a helper in addition to a counsellor. To understand the link between helping and counselling and its applicability, the paper explores and synthesizes helping theories and match them to a specific counselling session.

Helping Theories

Professionals within social, community, and youth circles tie helping with counselling and guidance. In fact, the notion of helping is so engrained in these fields that the population supposes every counsellor or psychologist to be a helper. The same can be argued for those in informal learning and social pedagogy. People going through difficult situation or experiences where decisions, choices and feelings are involved they need a person to guide them make sense of their occurrences, reach decisions and move on. Sometimes, it is in the best interest of others to judge that the person needs some form of “help.” Early scholars such as Gerard Egan postulated that helping in the counselling arena involve two major objectives: 1) helping the client manage their issues more efficiently by developing unused or underutilized potential. 2) Assess the client’s general ability to manage their situation on a day to day basis and nurture opportunities (Egan, 1998).

Apart from the counselling and guidance elements of helping, there are other specific circumstances where it is applicable. For example, helping someone file an income tax form, direct physical help such as helping a patient move, or practical activity such as offering financial or material needs. Social counsellors such as youth educators, clergy, learning mentors, and housing support personnel provide a comprehensive form of help encompassing all the above and emphasizes on developing and sustaining relationships.

The first theory of helping to explore is the skill and knowledge-ability of the helper. Much of the helping theories revolve around the “skills” of the helper with respect to the helped. Whether the skills is essential or not, it boils down to the relationship established between the helper and the helped. Helping works on the principle of learning the subject, creating a relationship and working with the subject to act in their situations. In this manner, they overstep the mandate of the counsellor. The helper need to be skillful, experienced, and be a particular kind of person drawing upon some skills but not taking on the persona of the counsellor (Higton, 2004). On the contrary, counselling takes a formalized context than helping, where a specific set of norms of thinking and practice are applied. Thus, helping in the context of therapy and counselling differs from helping in the context of pastoral care or house support service. Though skills are required to striking a relationship between the helper and the helped, skills are not mandatory. In fact, there is a danger in excessively being skillful. It is far much easier to fall into executing a certain skill without affecting the personality of the helper, as well as the function and relationship with the helped. For example, listening is a skill that should not be focused so much lets the person spend much time trying to show they are listening (nodding the head, posture, and look) rather than listening. If a person is sufficiently listening, it will be determined by the questions they ask, the statements they will make, and the relationship that will be developed (Smith, 2007, p. 25).

A helper requires some skills to foster the conversation and exploration. According to Culley & Bond (2004), the skills are foundational are grouped into three. First, active listening is mandatory and involve listening with a focus and responding in a manner the client affirms they have heard and understood. Second, reflective thinking incorporates the other person’s reference frame. This means the listener must capture the words of the client and restate, paraphrase or summarize. Finally, probing skills bring out the hidden aspects relating to the other person. Probing increases the person’s control over the situation and the content, and as such, should be applied sparingly and with caution, especially in counselling.

Higton (2004) argues that helping is more than just a technique and comes with identity and integrity. This indicates that learners need to be in a position to understand themselves better than the situation and lead a life that is authentic. The author posits that if the helper does not understand themselves, they cannot know their subjects nor offer a solution to their problems. Apart from self-awareness, there are other essential qualities that helpers must possess such as compassion, commitment and intellect. Caring and concern to alleviate suffering should be at the core of a helping situation. Although these elements seem to contradict professionalism, evidence has shown that people are more likely to explore concerns and questions when in the presence of a caring, listening, and respectful helper (Brandon, 1982).

Caring manifest itself in two ways: caring for and caring about: The latter is more abstract and is not relied on in helping. The former is more than the feeling of sympathy for another person and involve concern for their interest, giving hope and granting the needed help. To complete the process, the cared-for needs to realize the act of caring has occurred and consequently lead to a connection and a relationship that is reciprocated. Both parties give and gain from the relationship.

Finally, Smith (2008) argues that helpers require cultivating wisdom in those they help and themselves. The quality of a person attracts subjects for help, and since wisdom is naturally associated by others with a person rather than claimed, it indicates that helpers need to display that extraordinary understanding of the system, possess some regard for truth, and have sound ability to make judgments. Smith argues that for helpers, the appreciation of the things of the things that brings happiness and success, their internal experiences, and external factors is essential.

The third theory of helping is interpersonal relationship postulated by Carl Rogers. Rogers (1967) postulated that a relationship is a human feeling that develops when emotion is aroused by and devoted to another thing or person that connects back responsively. People or objects feel related when they are capable of feeling one another in a heartfelt manner.

Concerning helping, Rogers (1967) points out the focal point of developing a helping relationship. He states that a helping relationship is where one of the subjects intends that there should come about in one or both parties a sense of appreciation, expression, and functional utilization of the latent internal resources of each of the individual. This form of relationship applies to counselling sessions, between an educator and a learner, a parent and a child among others, as long as a special interpersonal relationship emerges. The author continues to expound that the extent of an individual to create relationships that enhance growth in others is based on the measure of growth they have accumulated themselves. This means that people are willing to explore the aspects they are confident will elicit feelings of respect and progressive understanding. Rogers suggested the three core conditions to facilitate helping as congruence, empathy and acceptance.

Application of helping theories in counselling

The case of Ricky

Ricky was brought to my attention by a colleague social worker who indicated that Ricky’s life was at stake. Ricky marriage had just been called off by multiple factors. Ricky was scheduled to wed in the next three days, but the marriage had been stopped from what her parents described as unbecoming behavior by the groom’s parents and the groom. The reluctant Ricky was brought to me by her parents who have established business persons in the town. Ricky’s younger brother is a software designer who studied at boarding school in his childhood unlike her. Ricky is a graduate anthropologist and is pursuing an MBA in human resources. Ricky’s parents and relations were shocked to learn from the groom and groom’s parents that their daughter was not faithful, and in fact, was involved with a high school boy twice her age. They also learned that Ricky has been communicating with a course mate via email and Whatsapp using explicit language and discussing sexual acts, a behavior that is unexpected of her background as a good girl born to a Christian family. The parents were surprised by the behavior of their daughter, especially in the past two years.

I requested her parents that I talk to them individually before meeting Ricky. Ricky confided to me that the groom and his parents are lying and that her parents are also not aware of the case and other secret details in her life. She told me that they had been meeting with a boy they meet at church but studies in a different country. She also admitted that they have been involved physically, but she could not marry him because he is still young and pursuing his career. She maintained that the boy is very supportive and is always there whenever she needed him. She further acknowledged the chat conversation with her MBA course mate but indicated that she has tried a couple of times to cutting off the relationship, even with the help of a friend. Ricky is a normal adult with no history of abnormality in pregnancy and growth. However, she maintain that she is very discrete and cares about her privacy. She wore long and sleeved dresses all the time. On this particular day, it was extraordinarily hot, but she had covered her body from head to toe. The family history indicates less except that the father was a reformed perpetual drunkard and a wife-beater. However, when the couple patched up, they would head for the holiday. She recalled being taken for vacation only once and the rest of the time she was left with the family caretakers. She notes that since she is the elder one, she was always in school, and her brother was always tucked along for most of the vacations.

I conducted interviews with Ricky’s close relations, teachers and friends to extract as much information as possible. At one session, her uncle tried to visit her at my clinic and showed contempt for her decision to get counselling. I noted the interference and prevented him from talking to Ricky. Ricky seemed much more at home with me and scared when the uncle appeared. She suddenly turned reserved and refused to talk. I asked her to draw an illustration. She drew a tree with a large uncurving trunk but with black leaves instead of green. From my analysis, it resembled a male organ with black pubic hair. I pulled out a book from my cabinet with human anatomy and pointed at the private organs. She immediately turned frightened, angry, and showed resentment. In fact, she wanted to leave the clinic. Finally, she could not hold it anymore and break down. She revealed that her uncle has been molesting her since the age of eight.

An analysis of Ricky’s case brings forth the ethological methodology to personality development based on the interaction between the subject and the caregiver. Attachment theory is posited as an indicator of behavior extending from infancy and early childhood to adulthood. The attachment between a subject and a caregiver is key to survival as it assures protection from external harm. In the case of Ricky, the parental issues contributed to child neglect and consequent exposure to the unsafe external environment.

As a helper and a counselor, an understanding of the needs of Ricky was essential to treatment and intervention. Ricky was suffering from a psychiatric disorder that requires immediate intervention. Ricky was ready for all interventions to protect her dignity and develop a positive view of herself. She was aware that she was not to blame for the abuse, no matter how it has been reported by the perpetrator of the abuse. I encouraged her to talk more about the abuse and the violence so we can conquer the feelings of fear, guilt, depression, and resentment. I discussed these feelings with her and assured her that “I totally understood what she was saying” and that she was a good girl. I also assured her that she was not alone in her feelings and that there are preventive mechanisms from symptoms such as withdrawal, avoidance, guilt, and nightmares.