Analysis of Why You Do the Things You Do by Clinton and Sibcys - Book Report/Review Example

WHY YOU DO THE THINGS YOU DO BY: TIMOTHY CLINTON & GARY SIBCY AFFILIATION: Contents Contents 2 Summary 3 Concrete responses 6 Reflection 7 Application 8 References 9 Why You Do the Things You Do Summary The title of the book is “Why you do the things you do” and the authors of this book are Timothy Clinton and Gary Sibcy. The book had been designed and fashioned in a transformational style, so that the contents of the book are easy for the readers to apply and transform the changes need to be brought in their lives. There are four main relations discussed in this book that enlightens the readers to know more about these relation’s origin and how the actions that come in with each relation are imposed on the receiver being dealt with. The book gives us a deep insight as to how people can learn to give love and respect to others and in return receive a better response. When one delivers better they tend to receive even better. The relations that are discussed are the relations with spouse, the relation with children, the relation with one’s close friends and lastly the relation with God. These relations are the most important ones in every human life. These relations are the basis on which the entire world of an individual depends upon. The most expectation one can expect is from these relations. Especially with the relation of God one expects a lot and always wants to be loved by their Lord so that all their matters run in perspective and no problems are faced. The core element that has been discusses as to why to we do the things the way we do is because of the way we are brought up. The surroundings and environment that has been given to the child by his or her parent’s designs the personality of the child and accordingly they start behaving or perceiving the things according to the perspective they have developed from their childhood environment. Desire to bring healthy changes in relationships is required by almost everyone. Every human looks for ways in which healthy changes can be implemented. The authors of the book emphasizes on this fact that if one wants to make the changes in their relationships they must know in a crystal clear way that in the first and foremost aspect what do they want to do?, then only the proper changes can come about in the relationship. The child’s bonding process is the ultimate reason as to why people behave the way they do. The nourishment and conditioning which the child receives in their childhood has a long term impact in the future. The basis of dealing with all other relations just depends on this one relation of conditioning. What parents give to the child make the child capable enough to think and deal with others in the same manner! The negative connotations that one builds about the relationships can be removed with the help of implementing the suggestions given in this book. This book gives a new dimension of light in how to improve the relations with family and friends and how to overcome the mistakes that have been conducted in the past. The book gives the secrets to maintaining healthy relationships at a consistent and constant level with the closest relations. Satisfaction by all close relatives can be attained by going through this book and then making an initiative to implement the transformation stage to one’s life. Family values are a highly essential element. At all stages of life no one should ever neglect their family or close relations as they are the ones who support you through all your good and bad times. To love all relations and to be loved by them is extremely important for every individual. Everyone strives towards getting love and respect from others. This books helps to make individuals improve all their close relations so that they can have strong bonds with all close relations and this will make them lead a successful life. People can improve their positive dimensions of dealing with others; individuals tend to react to situations according to how they perceive them. How they perceive depends on what background they came from and this is why some relations become extremely successful and some become very weak. The most important element that is the core of all relations is to make an effort to understand the other person’s feelings and requirements. Instead of imposing your own views, it is always better to discuss it with the other one too and then come to a general conclusion. This way the element of respect and understanding always remains intact for everyone. Concrete responses A personal life example that can be related with this book is as follows: there are times when close friends hang out together for fun or to accomplish any task. All friends are of different natures and come from various family and educational backgrounds. The perception of all friends may differ while making the decisions for any work. The more the no of friends on the decision panel the higher there are chances for conflict arising. Once we three friends had to manage a college event from the scratch till the end. The venue, the guests to invite, the menu, the ambience of the event and all other event issues were to be decided by our group. There were conflicts at each stage in deciding about on what to finalize each matter. Everyone was giving decisions on their personal likes and interests and from the backgrounds they came from. To reach to a consensus decision was becoming very difficult and we all were having un-necessary arguments. The arguments jumped from one matter to another and it reached into other personal matters. All of us were getting offensive and losing our main focus of where the conflict had arises. When I read this book, I immediately recalled that event and how we could have controlled our arguments if we would have remained calm and realized that we are friends of each other and not enemies. Reflection The book “Why do you do the things you do” has a very interesting feel to it as one goes through the matter depicted in the book. There are many situations related in the book in which many people may have faced the same situation. Especially, those matters, that portrays issues that are linked to bringing up children and dealing with spouse. I would like to have further information on how to deal with relations involving extremely difficult friends who are not willing to show any compromise related to any issue. The author has highlighted the relation to spouses in a highly effective manner. Many newlywed couples can gain a good insight with the help of this book while they make their marital relationship stronger. Bringing up children is a very critical matter because the child’s whole future life and personality depends on how he has been brought up in his childhood and what memories he or she possesses related to being a child. The author has given a clear focus on this subject and has made some valid suggestions which should be easily applicable by everyone. The most exciting content is the one which deals with the relation of one individual with God. This relation is extremely important for everyone and it holds extreme value for many of the individuals. The element of self esteem and self satisfaction can be achieved if this relation is given its due importance. This relation should be discussed more comprehensively in the book as the other relations are discussed. Application The book has highly influential contents in itself and in future it will be helpful to implement all those suggestions when any individual is planning for his personal growth process. The most influencing relations whom I will work upon in my future are to build better relations with my spouse and my children. The incidents discussed in this book have given me a good learning on how sensitive some matters can be and they should be dealt in a very smart way. To stay calm when dealing with critical matters is very important. In the future, as a working parent I may be quite indulged in my professional work related matters and a time may come that my spouse and children may tend to get neglected. From the beginning only I want to imply beneficial tactics as mentioned in this book so that I can lead a healthy work life balance. I don’t want to ignore my child at any stage of his growing process so that my children always have with themselves the good childhood memories and with the help of those memories they are able to shape up their personality and also their future. When children start growing up into teenagers they may have different needs and requirements, smartly dealing with all those requirements is an utmost necessity so that they don’t get offended at any stage. The title of the book completely depicts the content that is written by the authors and it is a very helpful book for every parent. References Clinton, Timothy and Sibcy, Gracy (2006). Why you do the things the way you do. Integrity Publishers, London. Read More