Homosexual Parents and Capability of Providing Care and Guidance Needed by the Children - Research Paper Example

Abstract Gay marriages is legal in some parts of the United States. Having a desire to enjoy the benefits of having children, lesbian and gay couples are enthusiast in adopting children from foster homes. Upon comparing and contrasting the difference between heterosexual and homosexual parenting, several research studies concludes that homosexual parents are equally capable of providing care and guidance needed by the children. Introduction Since the early 1970s, the issue on gay marriages in the United States has been very controversial. Today, some states in the U.S. such as New York, Massachusetts and New Jersey among others have successfully made gay marriages legal. Despite the effort in making same sex marriages legal, many organizations in different geographic areas within the United States remained strong in opposing the legalization of same sex marriages since encouraging same sex couple to adopt children could destroy the traditional concept of family relationship (The Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life, 2009). The Catechism of the Catholic Church (1603) explains that matrimonial contracts is a formal way of allowing “man and woman as they came from the hand of the Creator.” (Wiker, 2008) This is very similar to the U.S. code which states that a traditional marriage refers to the “legal binding of a man and a woman as husband and wife” (Cornell University Law School, 2008). In line with this, the traditional sense of a family relationship is composed of a father, a mother, and children. In relation to the human rights, gays and lesbians also deserve an equal right and treatment from men and women (Human Rights Watch, 2008). This includes the idea of some gays and lesbians wanting to raise their own family or enter into a marriage contract just like any other normal human beings (Jean, 2007). On the contrary, some people argues that the basic human rights for all does not necessarily include extending the matrimonial contracts to individuals who are homosexual because of fear that the traditional idea or concept of marriage, which should be kept between the husband and wife, will be destroyed (Prentice, 2007). This paper will compare and contrast the difference between heterosexual and homosexual parenting. Because of the controversial issues and fear that allowing gay parenting legal throughout the United States could destroy the real meaning of a traditional family structure, this paper will also gather related literature in determining whether gay parenting has a significant influence in the growth and development of children. As part of going through the main discussion, several research studies will be examinined specifically with the potential impact of gay parenting on the sexual preferencse, social balances, perception in life, behavior and beliefs. Literature Review Comparison between Heterosexual and Homosexual Parenting Since gay parenting has a significant influence over the sexual orientation of the children, may people are prejudice with regards to lesbian and gay parents (ACLY Lesbian and Gay Rights Project, 2002). As part of protecting the best interests of the children, gay parents often loss physical custody or being prohibited over the right to adopt children (Appell, 2003). On the contrary, Tobin and Mcnair (2009) argued that empirical evidences proves that there is really no concrete evidences to considering sexual orientation of parents in assessing their capability to adopt a child. There are some studies revealing that lesbians and gays are not allowed to foster care or adopt children for the reason that gays are considered mentally ill making lesbians less maternal as compared to women who are heterosexual (ACLY Lesbian and Gay Rights Project, 2002; Patterson et al., 2002). It is also possible that the type of sexual relationship that gays and lesbians have usually allows them little time to be involved in the actual parent-child interaction (Patterson et al., 2002). On the contrary, the study of Vanfraussen, Ponjaert-Kristofferson, & Brewaeys (2003) revaled that the parent-child interaction among the lesbian couples is fairly the same as compared with the heterosexual parents. In reality, there is no single empirical study that can prove that lesbians and gays are not capable of becoming a good parent (Anderssen, Amlie, & Ytterov, 2002; Perrin, 2002). In line with this, there are several studies showing no signficant difference between the way lesbians and heterosexual women could rear a child nor there were any difference in the mental health condition of the two groups of individuals (Bos et al., 2004; Patterson, 2001; Siegenthaler & Bigner, 2000). In fact, several studies concluded that lesbians and gays are fit to become foster children since gay parents are able to meet the common parenting challenges associated with taking care of a child (Bos et al., 2004; Armesto, 2002; Barrett & Tasker, 2001). In general, lesbian couples who are prenting a child together exert equal efforts and sharing of responsibilities in taking care of a child as compared to heterosexual parents (Bos et al., 2004). The same practice of equal division of work and responsibilities is seen among the gay fathers who are parenting a child (Johnson & O'Connor, 2002). On top of the equal sharing of role and responsibilities with the children, gay fathers are equally capable of performing the overall parental involvement, intimacy, and parenting skills necessary in improving the growth and development of children (Bigner & Jacobsen, 1989). For this reason, the study of Flaks et al. (1995) revealed that the parenting awareness skills of lesbian couples is even more stronger as compared to heterosexual couples even though lesbian couples are not the biological parents of the child. In terms of disciplining the children, more heterosexual parents are using physical punishment like spanking as compared to lesbian or gay parents (Johnson & O'Connor, 2002). Instead of using physical punishment in disciplining the children, lesbian and gay parents were found to be more prone of using positive techniques such as explaining to the children the wrong things they did as a way of correcting their attitudes and behavior (Johnson & O'Connor, 2002). As compared to heterosexual fathers, homosexual fathers tend to be more communicative with their children rather than the use of physical punishment (Bigner & Jacobsen, 1989). Influence of Gay Parenting on the Growth and Development of Children Because of legalization of same sex marriage in some parts of the United States, the idea of adopting children among the same sex couples has been increasing over the past few years (DWW & Myers, 2000). One of the major differences between lesbians, gays, and heterosexual parents is their gender and sexuality (Hicks, 2005). Although lesbians and gays could provide equal or even more time caring for their fostered children, gay parenting could somehow affect the growth and development of these children. In line with this, several studies revealed that allowing lesbian and gay parents to care for children could significantly affect the sexual preferences and gender role behavior and identity of the young ones in the sense that there is a higher chance that these children would end up becoming a lesbian or a gay once they have reached the school age or adulthood stage (Hicks, 2005; Patterson et al., 2002). Although there are some studies suggesting the possible influence of gay parents on the sexual preferences of their children, several past research studies revealed that there is no significant relationship between the parents’ sexual orientation and relationship status with their children’s psychological well-being or sexual orientation (Chan, Raboy, & Patterson, 1998; Golombok & Tasker, Do Parents Influence the Sexual Orientation of Their Children? Findings From a Longitudinal Study of Lesbian Families, 1996; Tasker & Golombok, 1995). In line with this, Flaks et al. (1995) revealed that children under the care and guidance of lesbian couples and children of heterosexual couples are equally healthy in terms of their psychological well-being and social adjustment. Likewise, Golombok, Spencer, and Ruttler (1983) confirmed that there is no signficant differences between the gender identiy and behavior nor emotional, behavioral, and social relationship development with other people among the children with lesbian couples as parents and those children with single heterosexual mothers. Since there are many people who do not accept lesbianism, gays or bi-sexuals due to religious reasons, children who were brought up by gay parents and eventually became lesbians and gays themselves often experience social problems in school and public places. After conducting a cross-cultural comparison between the two groups of gay and bisexual men living in the United States and the United Kingdom, the study of Carragher and Rivers (2002) revealed that ‘out’ lesbian, gay, and bi-sexual youths are prone of experiencing a long-term emotional and verbal abuse as they grow up. Because of the verbal abuse they receive from other people and the public’s negative reaction on their sexual orientation, some of the lesbian, gay, or bi-sexual youths may end up having a higher tendency of committing suicidal attempts as compared to children with normal sexual orientation (D'augelli, 2002). As part of the negative psychological and emotional impact of having a non-traditional family structure, Goldberg (2007) revealed that some children who were brought up by either lesbian or gay couples are not comfortable in sharing the kind of family structure they have with their friends and other people because of fear that other people may not be able to understand or accept the kind of familial situation and parents-and-child relationship they currently have. For this reasons, some of these children chooses not to disclose any information about their family circle. Contrary to the research findings of Goldberg (2007), Vanfraussen, Ponjaert-Kristoffersen and Brewaeys (2002) revealed that it is a myth that children with gay parents are at risk of being teased by other people as compared to children who belongs to heterosexual families since teasing among children with gay parents often occurs within the family setting. Discussion Gay parenting has been one of the most controversial issues in the United States. Although there are quite a lot of people who are against the idea of legally allowing gay parents to adopt children, several studies gathered in this study proves otherwise. In line with this, there are several studies showing no signficant difference between the way lesbians and heterosexual women could rear a child nor there were any difference in the mental health condition of the two groups of individuals (Bos et al., 2004; Patterson, 2001; Siegenthaler & Bigner, 2000). In fact, lesbians and gays are fit to become foster children since gay parents are able to meet the common parenting challenges associated with taking care of a child (Bos et al., 2004; Armesto, 2002; Barrett & Tasker, 2001). Likewise, children coming from a family structure that has heterosexual and homosexual parents did not affect their psycological well-being , (Ponjaert-Kristoffersen & Brewaeys, 2002). In fact, children with heterosexual and/or homosexual parents had equally high self-esteem aside from being widely accepted by their friends around them (ibid). The study of Baumrind and Owens (2001) concluded that controlling a child’s physical discipline as part of parenting is not automatically related with the negative behavior of a child. However, more research studies prove that there is a direct relationship between proper parenting and the aggressive behavior of an individual (Arnow, 2004). It is a generally accepted mentality that parents could directly influence the social behavior of their children prior to reaching the adolescence stage. Based on a survey that was conducted by Loeber’s group reflects the impact of parenting practices such as severe discipline, coercive way of controlling the children such as the use of violent threat, and voicing out some negative attitudes towards young boys aged ten could result in their aggressive behavior within the school compound (Last, 2001). Male and female individuals who have gone through childhood maltreatment either by experiencing or suffering from a physical or verbal abuse due to being neglected or a serious family dysfunction could make them go through a long period of depression (Arnow, 2004). Eventually, depression could lead to different psychiatric illnesses when left uncontrolled. Since most of the gay parents refrain from the practice of physical or verbal abuse when disciplining a child, it is less possible that children under the care and guidance of lesbian or gay couples to develop aggressive behavior. Based on the research study of McLoyd and Smith (2002), it was concluded that ethnicity and sexuality has nothing to do between parental physical discipline and the aggressive behavior of a child. Basically, those children who have witnessed inter-parental violence, excessive alcohol and drug use are some of the common indicators for an individual to commit school violence in high school (O'Keefe, 1997). Conclusion Gay parenting does not really affect the sexual orientation or social preferences of children. In line with this, children who were taken cared of gay parents are healthy and have high self-esteem similar to children who were raised by heterosexual parents. As compared to heterosexual parents, several studies revealed that gay parents are equally capable of becoming a good parent to children. *** End *** References ACLU Lesbian and Gay Rights Project. (2002). Too high a price: The case against restricting gay parenting. In Patterson C.J. 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