Parenting in the Western Culture - Literature review Example

Running Head: Parenting in the western Culture Parenting in the western Culture Name Institute Date Parenting in the western Culture Introduction Parenting is an essential component of a family, which is critical in developing individuals in the society who are not only competent to live and relate well with others, but also, able to discern right from wrong and make good choices (Davies 2000: 245). Through parenting, family members especially the children identify their role in the society, they establish their individual identity and they develop their personality and capacities (Bornstein 1998: 1). How individual perceive and fit into the world and the society respectively, is greatly impacted by the parenting they receive as they transition from one stage to another in the life development process. According to (Davies 2000: 245), parenting entails the enhancement and reinforcement offered to individuals emotionally, socially, physically, intellectually, mentally from their beginning of their lifespan development in infancy to later stages of adulthood and providing them with a pathway to receiving care, acquiring development and stature and adjusting to global and societal challenges and their acquisition of success. In modern society, this role can be charged to biological parents of a child, the government and the society. Important to note is that different people have different parenting styles and varied families opt to carry out parenting differently. Parenting in the western culture is significantly different from the Eastern and African culture and due to family complexities; parenting in the western culture has come under intense criticism, raising questions on the ability of western cultures to raise able, disciplined and upright children as highlighted by (Bornstein 1998: 1). This forms the basis of this report which is to critically discuss the opinion that it is impossible for two partners to work fulltime and raise children in the western culture. The report’s structure will entail an introduction, the main body which critically analyzes the statement in relation to changing gender roles, marriage and divorce and cultural expectations regarding parental responsibilities. Moreover, a comprehensive conclusion will be included. Changing gender roles According to (Bornstein 1998: 1), parenthood is perceived as the main indicator of gaining the adult social status. Be it as it may, as family pressures increases in terms of finances, the costs of living rises, access to equal educational and employment opportunities for both men and women increases and the gender roles continues to change in modern social environment, it is more common to find two partners with children both working fulltime in developed and developing economies and across all cultures in the eastern and western hemisphere. Having two partners working fulltime generate certain benefits such as empowerment for both genders especially women and enhanced family income and social status which allows access to better quality life, education and comfort for the whole family especially the children. Since gender roles are ascribed by culture, the western culture encourages concepts of domestic labor sharing and sharing in care giving, this means that raising children while two partners are working fulltime becomes easier since not one parent especially the mother is left to singly carry out domestic and parenting duties as witnessed traditionally (Bornstein 1998:1). However, these scenario generates negative implications such as less family time between parents and their children, parents lose on their parenting and become more of friends and providers to their children and the parenting role is either left to baby sitters and grand parents or children are left to parent themselves all of which have disastrous consequences in terms of molding the child’s personality, behavior, social skills and ideals. It is not impossible to raise children while two partners are working fulltime in the western culture since there are living examples of parents who have done so, although the challenges for these parents are immense. This is especially so when trying to divide between work time and family time and between being a parent and being an avid provider. According to Brown, et al., (2008: 188) the inability of two partners working fulltime to raise children is associated with a misunderstanding of the gender role where a man who sees himself as a breadwinner misunderstands his partner whose upbringing advocated for equality in decision making and responsibility sharing. According to Kostenberger & Jones, (2010: 2), gender role confusion on what it means to be feminine or masculine is a source of dissonance in raising children as a family with dual employment status. The changing gender roles where women are no longer contented with being stay at home mums and are increasingly becoming career women has contributed to this effect, where both partners pursue their personal professional goals while attending to their parenting role. Ultimate success for modern families especially in western culture is defined in terms of being able to be a career person, a spouse, an individual and a parent which is viewed in terms of self determination and independence as noted by Kostenberger & Jones, (2010: 1). The key to raising children for two partners working fulltime in western culture is responsibility sharing, striking the balance between family time and work time and setting the priorities right, where the parenting goals comes before anything else and where career aspirations and goals do not overshadow parenting role. Marriage and divorce As Kostenberger & Jones, (2010: 1) indicates, definition of marriage and family has rapidly changed in the western culture with people from same sex marrying and enhanced permutations in parenting and how the family is structured as witnessed with high numbers of single parent families, teenage parents, divorced families, adopted family units and blended family units. Coupled with dual parenting employment, these varied family structures impacts on parents especially on how they cope with stress and how parents interact with their children and as a result influence the development of the child and its ability to cope with life’s situations and challenges as supported by (Berrymn, et al. 2002: 275). The success rates of marriages in western cultures are relatively low while the divorce rates are high. As Kostenberger & Jones, (2010: 2) notes there is paradigm shift in perception of marriage and family in western culture where personal autonomy and self determination are now the core principles for human relationships. Due to laxity with which this culture takes divorce and marriage means, as married couples spend their time separately while working, it becomes virtually impossible to work as a unit and therefore, they easily opt to dissolve their marriage rather than sort out their differences. This gives no room to parenting as the now separated or divorced parent has lesser time to raise the children and more pressure to work harder even double shifts in a bid to retain the lifestyle the children were used for. The low commitment, social pressures and decreased accountability married partners in the western culture has on marriage makes it impossible for two parents to work fulltime while raising children (Troost, 2005: 207). However, with commitment, patience and selflessness towards marriage, two partners working fulltime can easily raise ideal children in the western culture. Modern women and men in western cultures find it hard to submit to their husbands and adore their wives in marriage respectively and they easily abandon their marriage vows in pursuit of their career goals. This is made worse if both have careers and therefore, they feel they can fit into the shoes of being a parent and a provider and therefore does not need a marriage partner as implied by (Brown, et al. 2008). Cultural expectations regarding parental responsibilities Bornstein (1998) mentions that parents irregardless of their cultural backgrounds are under immense pressure from the society to care, nurture and bring up children who are able to effectively and efficiently play their roles well and who are able to adequately adjust to life changes socially, economically, physically, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually and even psychologically. The culture expects a parent to not only be there physically and support their children emotionally but also, ensure the children have the best of life in terms of health, education, future security, comfort and acquisition of basic amenities such as food, clothing and shelter as echoed by (Bornstein, 1998). Providing these needs to children in western cultures requires substantial amount of resources in terms of finances which are easier obtained if the two partners are working fulltime. The cultural expectations and the realities of life in terms of economic instability make it difficult for parents to provide it all as noted by (Troost 2005: 207). For fulltime working parents who are raising children in western cultures, dual employment status for the parents initiates greater burden on the parents as they try to be good parents and providers as they balance between paid work and childcare responsibilities. This is mostly likely to lead to more stress and a conflict between their careers and their parenting responsibilities which translate to poor parenting as noted by Berrymen, et al., (2002: 275). Conclusion It is not impossible for two partners working fulltime to raise children in the western culture since the culture encourages changing of gender roles where men and women equally share in carrying out parenting duties which makes it easier for both of them to pursue individual career goals and pursue parenting. Moreover, dual parenting employment generates high family in come that helps acquire better education, health care, future stability, comfort and basic amenities for children. However, dual parenting employment generates immense challenges such as gender role confusion, increased focus on self determination and independence when defining human relations and less on the principles of institution of marriage and family and increased stress as the parent tries to balance professional time with parenting time in a bid to live up to cultural expectations laid on them. References Berrymn, J.C., Smythe, P.K., Lamont, A., & Joiner, R. 2002. Developmental psychology and you. London: Wiley-Blackwell. Bornstein, M.H. 1998. Refocusing on Parenting. Child and Family Research. Accessible from http://parenthood.library.wisc.edu/Bornstein/Bornstein.html Brown, S.D., Brown, S.D. & Lent, R.W. 2008. Handbook of Counseling Psychology. New Jersey: John Wiley and Sons. Davies, M. 2000. The Blackwell encyclopedia of social work. London: Wiley-Blackwell. Kostenberger, A.J. & Jones, D.W. 2010. God, Marriage, and Family: Rebuilding the Biblical Foundation. New York: Crossway. Troost, A. V. 2005. Marriage in motion: a study on the social context and processes of marital satisfaction. London: Leuven University Press. Read More

Changing gender roles According to (Bornstein 1998: 1), parenthood is perceived as the main indicator of gaining the adult social status. Be it as it may, as family pressures increases in terms of finances, the costs of living rises, access to equal educational and employment opportunities for both men and women increases and the gender roles continues to change in modern social environment, it is more common to find two partners with children both working fulltime in developed and developing economies and across all cultures in the eastern and western hemisphere.

Having two partners working fulltime generate certain benefits such as empowerment for both genders especially women and enhanced family income and social status which allows access to better quality life, education and comfort for the whole family especially the children. Since gender roles are ascribed by culture, the western culture encourages concepts of domestic labor sharing and sharing in care giving, this means that raising children while two partners are working fulltime becomes easier since not one parent especially the mother is left to singly carry out domestic and parenting duties as witnessed traditionally (Bornstein 1998:1).

However, these scenario generates negative implications such as less family time between parents and their children, parents lose on their parenting and become more of friends and providers to their children and the parenting role is either left to baby sitters and grand parents or children are left to parent themselves all of which have disastrous consequences in terms of molding the child’s personality, behavior, social skills and ideals. It is not impossible to raise children while two partners are working fulltime in the western culture since there are living examples of parents who have done so, although the challenges for these parents are immense.

This is especially so when trying to divide between work time and family time and between being a parent and being an avid provider. According to Brown, et al., (2008: 188) the inability of two partners working fulltime to raise children is associated with a misunderstanding of the gender role where a man who sees himself as a breadwinner misunderstands his partner whose upbringing advocated for equality in decision making and responsibility sharing. According to Kostenberger & Jones, (2010: 2), gender role confusion on what it means to be feminine or masculine is a source of dissonance in raising children as a family with dual employment status.

The changing gender roles where women are no longer contented with being stay at home mums and are increasingly becoming career women has contributed to this effect, where both partners pursue their personal professional goals while attending to their parenting role. Ultimate success for modern families especially in western culture is defined in terms of being able to be a career person, a spouse, an individual and a parent which is viewed in terms of self determination and independence as noted by Kostenberger & Jones, (2010: 1).

The key to raising children for two partners working fulltime in western culture is responsibility sharing, striking the balance between family time and work time and setting the priorities right, where the parenting goals comes before anything else and where career aspirations and goals do not overshadow parenting role. Marriage and divorce As Kostenberger & Jones, (2010: 1) indicates, definition of marriage and family has rapidly changed in the western culture with people from same sex marrying and enhanced permutations in parenting and how the family is structured as witnessed with high numbers of single parent families, teenage parents, divorced families, adopted family units and blended family units.

Coupled with dual parenting employment, these varied family structures impacts on parents especially on how they cope with stress and how parents interact with their children and as a result influence the development of the child and its ability to cope with life’s situations and challenges as supported by (Berrymn, et al.

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