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Your Lot in Life - Essay Example

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Divorce is a very sensitive area that always needs to be handled with great care and tact because it not only affects the parents involved but leaves a lasting impact upon the children. …
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Your Lot in Life
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?Your Lot in Life Order No. 532040 Divorce Divorce is a very sensitive area that always needs to be handled with great care and tact because it not only affects the parents involved but leaves a lasting impact upon the children. The aftermath of divorce has a negative impact on the emotional and social aspects of a child and this continues to affect them for the rest of their life making them vulnerable targets in society. Research studies indicated that the period following divorce could result in serious disorders that could affect the child emotionally as well as psychologically. However, generally, a higher majority of adults do not exhibit such risks. Adult mental health was impacted upon by the negative effects of divorce because of lower levels of achievement at school, economic status of the family at 16 years of age and other problems related to the adolescent’s feelings and emotions. [PubMed - indexed for MEDLINE] Though the pain and trauma of divorce cannot be totally done away with, the use of the right interventions at the right time could help a great deal in minimizing this impact and encouraging good coping strategies. According to (Gardner, 1985) Guidance and support from other family members and developing skills that help us cope with life is of prime importance. Erik Erikson, (1902 – 1994) a great child psychologist explains that a child passes through 8 stages from an infant to an adult in relation to a divorce in the family and if guided in the right manner will help the child to adjust better in a shorter period of time. 2. Effects of Alcoholism A happy family is one where every member fulfills their duties to each other in the right manner. In case any one member is unable to do so, then what follows is conflict and chaos within the family. One major factor that contributes to disharmony among its members is the abuse of alcohol which has damaging effects. Good verbal and non- verbal communication would kindle good rapport among the family members and bring about a strong bonding among them. This would not be possible if even one of its members is alcoholic. Studies have proved that alcoholism not only brings a lot of disharmony in the family but it also brings with it fear, anger, hate, disgust and regret and greatly impacts upon the growth and development of their children that leads them to early bouts of depression in their childhood which in turn grossly lowers their IQ and cognitive skills. Our contemporary society is faced with the scourge of one of the greatest menaces being Alcohol and Drug abuse. The addiction creeps upon them so insidiously that at most times people are not even aware of it. The adverse effects of Alcohol abuse are far reachable and deteriorating especially within families where children have to face the ugly brunt. Studies have shown that abused children of alcoholic parents suffer immensely with low confidence and self esteem and never seem to get over it even in their adulthood. While some research studies show that children of Alcoholics (COAs) do suffer a lot of negative consequences. Detecting such problems at an early stage would help to prevent them in the school and later on in life as the child matures which include depression, anxiety and in turn substance abuse. 3. Safety of children in unsafe communities The safety of children is of prime importance for any devoted parent and more so when they are aware that they live in an unsafe neighborhood or community. Such surroundings necessitate heightened vigilance by the parents because it poses a hindrance to their daily activities. According to the ((U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 2000) families living in a large number of communities have neighborhoods that are rampant in violence and crime and both children and parents are exposed to robberies, murders and assaults either directly or indirectly. (Veenema, 2001) In trying to ensure the safety of their children many parents have taken an active part in the community and are trying to make it a much safer place for the children. Some of the efforts made on the part of the parent are improving the community life of the people through creative and productive programs, by educating their children of the risks involved in the safety and by being highly vigilant, cautious and closely monitoring the whereabouts of their children. Jarret, Jefferson and Roach (2000) conducted interviews on community safety and got mothers to cite how they ensure their child’s safety in a dangerous neighborhood. Most mothers stated that they kept their children under constant supervision and physically close to themselves. While the interviews by Letieca and Koblinsky (2004) for the fathers had them emphasizing the fact that children are monitored at all times and they never allow their children to play outside after dark. In case of violent incidents, the parents at the once alerts their child which enables them to keep out of harm’s way. 4. Tool Chest for Problems Indiscipline or problematic behavior stems from many factors that are responsible for such behavior. Some of these primary factors are children from poor socio- economic backgrounds, children from broken homes, segregation and discrimination, very low self confidence and self esteem and children from homes where parents are victims of alcohol and drug abuse. Parents exhibiting impatience, anger or spanking their children expose children to becoming abusive themselves in their adult lives. According to (Hawkins, Catalano, & Miller, 1992) the early onset of discipline problems in school children predicts later maladjustment. Misbehavior leads to poor cognitive skills and therefore poor academic outcomes. In such a scenario, the teacher plays a pivotal role in directing the child towards the right direction. The teacher acts as a role model and gains the confidence of the child. The teacher engages the child in productive and positive programs and provides them with opportunities to showcase their talents and skills. Counseling for both parents and students would greatly help in better behavior outcomes. Engaging students in practical community service would help them to be more committed and service oriented. Taking students on field trips to visit the poor, old and disabled would help to kindle better awareness on the social problems that exist. Equal commitment on the part of the teacher and the child, ‘serves as the most effective strategy for the prevention of youth problems’ (Pittman & Fleming, 1991:3) Attention to cultural factors in different ethnic communities is often emphasized as key to positive youth outcomes (Deyhle, 1995; Boykins & Toms, 1985). References Children of Addicted Parents http://www.hopenetworks.org/NACAPg2.htm Erikson’s Psychosocial Development www.allpsych.com/psychology101/social_development.html Gardner, R.A. (1985). Recent trends in divorce and custody litigation. Academy Forum, 29 (2), 3-7. Heath, P. Parent-Child Relations, 2nd Ed., 2009, pages 189 to 190.)  Positive Youth Development www.aspe.hhs.gov/hsp/positiveyouthdev99/chapter1.htm Read More
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