Effective negotiation skills - Essay Example

(Lewicki and Hiam, 2006, p. 42) In business situations we very often know when a negotiation situation is likely to happen and this allows us to gather information both on our own position and that of the other party. It is very important to have clear what the goal of the negotiation is. People often forget this, and get trapped into winning the argument for its own sake, without considering whether all the effort is going to bring the desired results in the end. In fact there may be times when winning the argument is not the best outcome: “There is no value in driving the best deal if it causes resentment and a desire for revenge that will sour business and could cost you more in the future than you could have saved in the short term.

” (Steele and Beasor: 1999). It is wise also to consider what the alternatives would be if this proposed deal is not successfully resolved. A company which has many different suppliers, all offering good products at competitive prices will not need to bargain so hard with one particular customer because the fall back position is to go elsewhere. This means that before going in to a negotiation situation we should weigh up how strong our own position is in this respect, and try to figure out how much the other party needs and wants to make this agreement.

In the opening phase of a negotiation it is important to try and build a good relationship with the other party and make the discussions pleasant and polite. In personal situations, however, this can be quite difficult at times. In my own personal life, for example, I recall having a very difficult discussion with my parents about going on holiday with my friends. I was in a weak position, because I desperately wanted to go, but relied on my parents for a part of the money, since I was still a teenager with only a part time job which did not pay well.

My parents took, in my view, a very hard line and said that I was too young to go on holiday without supervision and they refused to give their permission. At the time I got angry and this started a huge family row. I told them that I felt they were old fashioned, out of date, and had fascist rules which were unfair to me. Due to the influence of my sister, who was, and still is, smarter about human relationships, I realized that my parents actually did not want to cause me pain, but were worried about my safety driving south in my friend’s car, and a possible bad influence from a particular boy in my circle of friends.

I followed my sister’s advice, apologized to my parents about the outburst, and explained that this was important for me as a step towards independence. My parents clarified their concerns, and I told them, truthfully that the boy they were concerned about was not going on the holiday. They agreed to support my holiday, and I agreed to keep away from drugs and to telephone home every three days. My mistake in this negotiation was in demanding rather than asking, in an aggressive way, and in failing to establish what the reason for my parents’ objections were.

I also failed, at first, to understand where my parents were coming from: “We must start a negotiation thinking about the pictures in the heads of the other party” (Diamond, 2010, p.135). Once I had understood their fears, the facts were clarified and a more respectful tone was adopted, we each put