Being Clear on What Is and What Should Be Queer. This Conceptualization Of Queer - Essay Example

6 February Being Clear on What Is and What Should Be Queer Queer is what is different to the heterosexual norm, and oftentimes, society defines it as a pathological condition. In “How Do You Fuck a Fat Woman,” Harding does not directly discuss the word “queer,” but she explores the politics of sexuality and heteronormativity in the issue of a raped fat woman, which can be related to the social definition of what queer is. It is inferred from Harding’s essay that because of heteronormativity, queer includes fat women, whose only chance of experiencing sex is by being raped. In The Trouble with Normal, Warner examines the dilemma of determining and pursuing what is normal. Being normal casts negative shadows on what is queer, which is why Warner thinks it is wrong for the Mattachine Society to toss aside the issue of sex to gain respectability and normativity. Two definitions of queer emerge because society defines it as having sexual norms that are against heteronormativity, something that is sinful and pathological (or what queer should be), while Harding and Warner describe it as composed of variations to the norm, where everyone has equal sexual agency (or what queer is). Society defines queer as opposite to acceptable heterosexual norms and practices. Sex is central to the concept of queer, but society, in its heterosexual morality, seeks to undermine queer sex as improper, immoral sex. Harding and Warner question the dominant social definition of queer as a negative sexual attitude and behavior just because it is outside heteronormativity. Who defines what is queer? For Harding, the hypermasculine culture defines queer vis-a-vis its sexual and political interests. She asserts that society conditions women to live for their “primary obligation”: “to make [themselves] pretty for heterosexual men’s pleasure” (68). Queer women, by sexually desiring the same sex, are clashing with their predominant obligation. Furthermore, queer is defined not according to what the defined actually feels, but how heterosexual society describes it should be. Harding criticizes society and the media for having a skewed understanding of beauty and attraction, which is the basis of political and social roles, functions, and boundaries. After discussing how society and the media pressure fat people to be thin, Harding notes that it is clear that: “…fat is Not Hot” (74, capital letters from original text). Beauty is reserved for the thin, and people are supposed to be attracted only to thin people. Queer is unattractive to heterosexual norms. Another definition from mainstream society is that queer is abnormal and must be concealed or changed to suit heteronormativity. Warner criticizes the efforts of some gay organizations to desexualize their struggles because the essence of being queer is being sexual and being open about it. He stresses that homosexuality is central to the fight for gender equality: “It is hard to claim that homosexuality is irrelevant as long as you feel the need to make the claim” (46). Sex and sexuality are political centers of the aspiration for personhood. Warner argues that sex is politics and queer is political. In 1953, the Mattachine Society’s new leaders assert the importance of “integrating” as a way of showing the public “new maturity” (Warner 46). To integrate is to be non-sexual and to be non-sexual is to forget that sexuality is a political struggle for the queer. And to forget that queer is sexual and political is to say that queer is dead and must remain so. Warner’s point is that by desexualizing the queer movement, the queer are accepting the social definition that they are not acceptable because they are not the norm. Queer is abnormal and must remain hidden in the bathrooms and bushes. Fat women are queer too because their physical characteristics put them at the fringes of physical attraction. Harding points this out persuasively, as she analyzes the heterosexual norm, where: “No one wants to fuck a fatty” (69). As a result, society bombards fat people with messages and images of thinness, for them to feel inferior because they have extra weight. Queer is anyone who does not conform to the heterosexual ideas of beauty and attraction, and unchanged, they must remain under the social radar or change to find a semblance of social acceptance. When sex is reserved to those who follow heterosexuality, queer is a problem that must be solved through the politics of the hypermasculine and normalization. The idea that queer is immoral is emphasized when a blogger comments to a raped fat woman that she is lucky to be raped. One person commented to the story of raped fat woman: “You should consider yourself lucky that some man finds a hideous troll like yourself rape-able” (Harding 67). Harding questions the underlying gender roles and assumptions behind this brutal comment. She believes that the hypermasculine world defines sexuality and beauty, thereby giving order to unjust beliefs and practices, including the logic that it makes sense to accept the rape of fat women. Warner explores the dilemma of defining queer as abnormal and so it must be normalized. Normal is just statistics, but people have come to embrace it as the right kind of life. People want individuality, but only the “normal kind” (Warner 53). Normalcy has been glorified into what should be. People want to be normal because it is related to being “right, proper, healthy” because “what most people are” is what they should be (Warner 57). As society wants to be normal, even gay organizations and individuals crave for it. They become embarrassed of their sexuality because queer is abnormal. They accept and embrace the norm by concealing their sex. This conceptualization of queer is not to remain unchallenged because Harding and Warner describe queer as composed of variations to the norm, where everyone has equal sexual agency. Warner argues that the norm is not the measuring stick of rightness, including sexual rightness. Queer people are only confusing themselves when they even attempt to follow the norm: “…statistics only help with one’s embarrassment; they say nothing about the desirability of things themselves” (54). The norm should not be the target; it is only what the majority seems to be. In reality, the norm is not even normal in the sense that it applies to all in every circumstance. Warner cites Canguilhem, who said that “the abnormal of today” is “the normal of yesterday” (174). In essence, the norm is in constant flux because of individual and environmental changes. Instead of accepting queer as abnormal, queer should be seen as many other variations of the norm, variations that should not be negatively perceived, but accepted without biased preconceptions. Warner compares sexuality to health norms: “…health lies not in the repetition of those functions for all persons or for all time, but in the ability to create new functions, new adaptations, new conditions” (Warner 59). Queer is then a new sexual function, a new adaptation and condition for society to explore and respect. Queer is what it is, or queer are what they are. Harding affirms the need for agency in expressing one’s sexual identity. She compares two boulders, the “must lose weight” boulder and the “fuck you, I will boldly, defiantly accept the body I’ve got and live in it” boulder (Harding 75). She invites fat women to push the defiant boulder, the one that expresses sexual agency. It does not matter if this is a heavy boulder that counters heteronormativity. It matters more that it is pushed and provocatively so. Harding calls for all women, especially the queer, to fight for their sexuality. Warner asks queer people to stop depoliticizing and desexualizing their goals, and even, their lives. Politics and sex are crucial to their movement for gender equality. It is only through the achievement of gender equality, where people see all genders as equally moral, that the queer will have the power to define themselves, not to limit who they are, but to have the power to constantly define and redefine their individual and collective identities. Queer and its multitude of empowering definitions is the springboard of the true queer, the queer who are not judged against any norm, but merely accepted because they exist. Works Cited Harding, Kate. “How Do You Fuck a Fat Woman.” Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power & A World Without Rape. Eds. Joclyn Friedman and Jessica Valenti. Berkley, CA: Seal P, 2008. 57-76. Print. Warner, Michael. The Trouble with Normal. New York, NY: The Free P, 1998. Print. Read More