Full name Professor Subject Date Romantic Love is a Poor Basis for Marriage The basis for marriage has changed drastically over the years with a lot of people saying that love should be the foundation. However, is it enough? People want to believe that love is all that matters when it comes to spending the rest of your life with another person, but most of the time this is not the case…
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One day, a love-struck couple marry with all the complements for each other then the next day they are cursing one another in front of a judge. With the growing effects of media and the rampant news of the activities of celebrities which tend to become the models for younger generations nowadays, “love” is much celebrated and exalted in choosing a partner and deciding on marriage. However, it is interesting to note that “love” is now understood more on the feelings a person feels towards another rather than its basic ingredients which are patience, kindness, humility, loyalty and others. Men and women alike, now think they are more intelligent, more informed and allow themselves to find out if they have the “chemistry” to make a marriage work. They test this by staying together under one roof without getting married and if their sexual desires are satisfactorily met, then they decide to marry each other. However, in the long run, they find out that they made a mistake and therefore end up in a divorce. One of the studies on this topic was that of Tennov’s “limerence” which is the state of “being in love”, seeing all the good things in a person and disregarding the bad, just simply feeling good about everything that is happening in the relationship. The sad thing about this state is that, it only lasts for around two years (Owens). With the aforementioned study, it could be said that making romantic love the foundation of a relationship is foolish, not unless one plans to change partners every two years. More and more studies are being held these days about love and marriage, with the desire to dig into what makes marriages work. when one looks around, only a handful seem to have all that it takes for a marriage to be happy and lasting at the same time while so many seem to be lost without a manual. Scholars around the world search the differences of marriages, ones that work out and those that do not. In this extended search, there have been so many conclusions made, suggestions given to couples, seminars held and probably more will be done to inform people and make their relationships work. One thing is for sure, romantic love is not enough to be the basis for marriage. There is a saying that says, “Love goes out of the window, together with the plates and spoons when there is no food on the table”. In some cases, this is literally true. Couples who joined themselves together in marriage can simply lose their temper when they are clawed by poverty and other troubles. This has been one of the guiding principles of most ancient an more recent eastern marriages. According to the studies of Lawrence Stone regarding English families until the eighteenth century, marriages were made on the basis of need for financial stability and lineage (Macfarlane). Despite this circumstance, many marriages worked well if the basis for such comment would be the lesser divorce rates as compared to modern statistics. People then lived according to the norms and cultures of their age and space so that they were able to suppress their want to choose the person they would like to marry on the basis of romantic love. Taking into consideration the study on “
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There is a widely believed notion that romantic love is the essential guide to marriages in the current society. This is because partners in a romantic love are close to each other and understand each other better mostly among the young people (Putte, Matthijis, 580).
The paper tells that love is an expression through actions that eventually create an environment suitable for nurturing a partnership between couples. These factors alone should be enough to prove that people should give more importance to the idea of love in marriages, and perhaps act according to this belief.
Record your findings. Also, look at the desired qualities posted by men versus women. Record these qualities for three men and three women. Relate your findings to factors discussed in class. Do not simply cut and paste the ads for the assignment. I want to read your writing, not theirs.
This is because its emphasis is placed on critical issues within a marriage such as family and economic background; this necessitates the need to evaluate the importance of arranged marriages as opposed to love marriages in saving and cleaning the mess associated with the institution of marriage.
It became socially approved, and, in most cultures, people were encouraged to marry, as it kept the social order, and ensured survival and that the descendants would be produced and raised successfully.
During the past century, marriage as a form of social organization has been loosing its positions gradually.
Such arguments often treat love as an idealistic aspiration, fuelled by the media, and reason that the marital institution demands a firmer grounding than some vague notion of erotic attraction; Wexman, for instance, has noted that "Cultural historians generally agree that the emphasis on romantic love and association with marriage and personal fulfillment first took hold in the nineteenth century as part of the romantic cult of individualism" (1993: 12).
Too many individuals take advantage of this ease of entry and, unfortunately, leap into marriage before they look at the true implications of vowing to be together through sickness and health for many years. Hypnotized by music, mate and magic moment, or deluded into believing that marriage will make a drab life exciting, they blurt out, "I do," with little thought to the day when romance fades, as it must, when the honeymoon, in truth, is over.
In the U.S, family dissolution rates have been rising for five decades in spite of the benefits of stable marriages. Marital quality has generally declined over the past few decades. Even in marriages that do last into the longer-term, it is important that the quality of the marriage is sufficiently high that the couple is content with their life.
accepted and carried out in all the cultures and religions around the world, there may be different perceptions of the societies on how important they think marriages are, and the form that they should be. Usually, the research has found out two types of marriages in which a
According to the report romantic love and close friendship relationships usually involve intimacy that is a form of love where two parties share in matters regarding their physical lives. Love is an affection among people that gives meaning to life and spurs vibrancy and vitality in the social construction.
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