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Rhetorical Strategies - Essay Example

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Kaleng, Wong Oct 22, 2011 Greg Christensen Chap4 Essay Comments & Quick Grade A good start Kaleng, but I’m still seeing numerous examples of garbled speech and poor sentence control here such that they become a significant distraction in the reading of your work – it becomes impossible to focus on your ideas and analysis without getting caught in the language here…
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These error patterns are “deal breakers” – I cannot see them in your work if you want to pass the course because they demonstrate to me your inability to control your own sentences, a core skill you need to have mastered upon entering English 101A. As I’ve suggested in the past, you should be working with a tutor regularly, and you should consider (re)taking English 846 (which focuses on sentence building and communicative fluency in your writing) before attempting a course at this level again, alright?

I can’t pass this work, nor do I expect to be able to pass you in the course at this point given what I’m seeing here. You may rewrite if you wish. You’ll have two weeks to submit a revision via email. Assignment & Proofreading 1/4 Thesis 2/4 Focus & Clarity 2/4 Development & Support 3/4 Language & Mechanics 1/4 Late (2 pts = -10%) -/20 Total 9/20 ________________________________ 20 = 100% A 15 = 75% C 19 = 95% A 14 = 70% C- 18 = 90% A- 13 = 65% D 17 = 85% B 12 = 60% D- 16 = 80% B- 11 = 55% F *Please see the Grading Rubric Explanation found within the course for a detailed description of the numbers and criteria on the grading grid each of the component marks above corresponds to.

*If this essay is marked as a late submission, either because it missed its deadline or was not in an acceptable form at the time of submission, it is ineligible for the rewrite option and this grade will stand as the final mark for the essay. This policy is laid out clearly in the Course Syllabus. Please apply these grading marks and comments to your next essay work instead. Difficulties of Crossing the Line Award-winning journalist Ruben Martinez effectively demonstrates the difficulties of crossing the boundary between Mexico and America in “The Crossing”, a selection in Reading America.

Martinez’ mother is from El Salvador and married to a Mexican American. His parents merge with American culture yet maintain their Mexican heritage with frequent family visits to relatives in Mexico. Martinez claims both his Mexican and American backgrounds, and recalls early visits to Mexico in his story. His memories of leaping back and forth between the two counties comprise the foundation of his childhood. Through his recollections, Martinez highlights the importance of the border line as a boundary full of historical and economic heritage.

Many people want to cross from Mexico to America, and the line acts like a sieve—catching some people, but letting others through. Many unpredictable events, like death, can occur to people crossing the boundary, and people’s reasons for wanting to make the journey are countless. The author recounts the story of Victor, an illegal immigrant who has diabetes. Victor is attempting to cross the border line from Mexico to America to find his sister. He hopes for a good life, and believes America can offer better treatments for his medical condition than what Mexico can offer.

The author’s memories convey the truths about crossing the border, and the difficulties of passing through it. Martinez creates pathos by telling about his experiences and those of others he met while traveling across the border. He considers himself an American today because the expansion of

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