What Prevents Us from Being Ourselves - Essay Example

The masks we wear Introduction In most of our interactions, we always present a persona that often hides our feeling and thoughts. The persona shows a composed, polished person and is meant to portray a controlled face to the world. We often hide our true intentions and fears that might be haunting us. Everyday interactions are behind the mask. It leaves people with no knowledge of our real personality. Always we will be engaged in superficial exchanges either at meetings, parties and any other place that requires socializing. The following is an exploration of the masks we wear in our daily lives and why we wear them. What prevents us from being ourselves? In our conscious we have a right perception of who we are and what we ought to be. It is engrained in us to know what drives us and what motivates our spirit to take up new roles and tasks. Mostly, Individuals are not willing to show their real character, and this might be to the following reasons. The need to be accepted is a primary reason for people to have a different persona. The average individual has a tendency to seek acceptance from other people in the society. Because of this reasons individuals may not want to be viewed in a negative light as it might hinder them from being accepted. The society has laid norms of what is good, what is bad and what is acceptable as a member of the community. Those who go against these rules are as rebels and are not given approval by other members. Fear of judgment is always at the back of most peoples’ minds. It is because of such reasons that a person will present another persona to those he or she interacts with. It will eventually hinder them from being themselves. Social expectations may also hinder a person from being who they are. As a person goes the process of socialization various expectations from family members, friends and family are laid on him or her. Eventually, the burden of fulfilling the expected roles is so high that people might end up losing their original personality. It is because life might require a different set of principles to play the roles. The anonymity that a mask places on an individual’s life is addicting to them. It requires less effort to go with what the majority want than to stand by their values. Many people often find comfort is just being accepted and rarely pursue what their inner person wants. Insecurity is also widely blamed for facilitating such ambiguity in the human behavior. Most people might be insecure about their abilities. Their lack of self-belief will lead to them accepting whatever comes their way (Calabrese, pp, 1-50). The difference between peoples self-portrait and how they look like and why? As stated earlier our daily interactions are done behind the mask. They don’t portray a reflection of what is in the inside. The average person is concerned about his appearance to other people in the society. People are afraid to be judged or that their weaknesses will show to the public. Without a mask for protection against the exposed insecurities, a person might be hurt. The mask gives a safe hideout; it has layers that show a person’s confidence. However, it might become difficult for a person to stay composed. It is why people find the need reveal the real self to the world. The characteristic of the portrayed image is one of confidence. For example people in positions of leadership, these types of people are not allowed to show weaknesses as it might interfere with their roles. An individual might display self-belief and even humility as part of their masked character. The masked persona will hide the real intentions of a person. People can hide their intentions in the character that they display to the public. A character that presents respectable morals will make the public not question the intentions of a person. If people were to be judged by what they show, we would be misdirected. Most of the people in society will use it to manipulate others into doing what they want. The masked persona will portray all the positive traits and may maintain a sense of emotional and mental stability. The major question to be is “is what we see the real character of the person." Most of the time, the answer is no, it is because the person has worn a mask to hide mental and emotional thinking. The inner person might be weak, stressed, guilty or even depressed. It is all part of the human nature and more than often we will wear them to disguise our real self. It helps to gain social acceptance, to hide our vulnerability, to hide fear and anger, to deceive and manipulate others and to hide the truth. The portrayal of another self rather than our real self might help every individual through a variety of situations. Masks make an excellent psychological defense mechanism that helps people to maneuver through life (Calabrese, pp, 1-50). Why dont people speak up while others are bullying? Over the years, cases of bullying have been known to occur. However, it is only when they get serious that that people will report them to the relevant laws. For a long period, there have been questions on why children and young adults don’t report these cases. Research shows that there are various psychological reasons that may make it hard for these people to report such cases. The victims might not want to appear weak in front of their parents and peers. Because of the social mask that they have placed on themselves they have made others believe that they are strong and cannot be. When bullying happens, the child does not feel the urge to report because his social acceptability will be diminished. There is also the acceptance of bullying by most of the students. A common mistake that people make is to think that since others are okay with it, they must also accept it. The social standards that are set by the school environment have several implications for the child. They make a child embrace a social mask that will be acceptable to the social standards set there. When this happens, even bullying cannot be reported as it is like an ordinary activity. Masking has many disadvantages to an individual’s life it is because it encourages the insincerity of character. Not only does a person lie to themselves but also to those who interact with him on a daily basis. It may lead to dissatisfaction, physical and emotional exhaustion and even feelings of dissonance. Self-satisfaction should be essential in individual life as it is far more fulfilling to be yourself than a portrait of what we want society to see (Calabrese, pp, 1-50). Conclusion Human beings are complex individuals; they aim to please others making social acceptability a part of their everyday life. Social standards are like the most basic principles of what ought to be done. Although what individuals believe in is different from societal standards, they might still pursue these goals. The social mask helps them to disguise their real feelings and thoughts. There is also a vast difference between the individual we portray ourselves to be and who we. Hiding our insecurities is the main idea behind this approach. Condoning of bullying might also be attributed to the mask effect with social acceptability being embraced more than personal values. A person will often choose to suffer to protect his image to other people. Works cited Calabrese, Claudia P. "The Masks We Wear." 101 Interventions in Group Therapy (2010): 141. Read More