Why Bullying - Assignment Example

Why Bullying? Introduction Bullying has been an emerging issue in today’s society and has always been for decades. Have you ever encountered anybody who was bullied or have you experienced it personally? If the answer is yes, then you probably understand the meaning of bullying and you understand it is not a good experience. As an issue of concern, bullying is negative as it necessitates problems even in circumstances where there is no ill motive is intended. This is because some form of bullying are puns, jokes or pranks that are meant to be fun and games only. There are no known benefits or signs of bullying of bullying in all sectors if the parties involved either as onlookers or participants do not speak about it publicly. But the results are always visible for all to notice as it has the potential of not only ruining one’s life but killing them completely. Some do not die out of injuries, but stigma and psychological torture, coupled with insecurity and low self esteem which leads them to suicide to be free from their bully and humiliation due to bullying. A bully is a person who takes advantage of another person because of his or her strength, to influence, harm or intimidate others into making their wishes or just for fun so as to look superior and mighty. There are various types of bullying some of which are committed intentionally or unintentionally. Physical bullying which is common among kids is common to most people because they use it as an element of gaining power among peers and other parties involved more so in high school. Secondly, there is verbal bullying where perpetrators use words which are annoying, degrading or abusive to intimidate others, in order to gain power or authority over their peers. This is mostly observed in colleges where people really want to be seen as lovable and any negativity can cause serious harm. Thirdly, is relational bullying which can be referred to as emotional bullying and it is normally used to gain a social standing among others by the element of control. Fourthly, is cyberbullying, where perpetrators use the internet or mobile devices to threaten or embarrass others. Lastly, is prejudicial bullying which is based on prejudices of ones belief and is always directed at those practicing dissimilar beliefs or ideologies.This research paper examines bully as the person committing bullying acts by choosing a desired topic, relating it personal experiences and the memoir My true story of Fear, Anxiety and Social phobia (Louder words) by author Chelsea Swigget. My True Story Of Fear, Anxiety And Social Phobia (Louder Words) By Author Chelsea Swigget The memoir is about Chelsea Rase who writes a memoir about her life as a young tenager as shse battles which such issues like anxiety, depression and issues of bad eating habits. Shes uses various incidences in her life to explain how thesesissues affected her life in all major sectors for her audiences to understand her deeply. Unlike fears faced by tenagers her age, Chelsea faces fear of detah, anxiety of being in a social setting and the type and quantity of food she eats.Through her memoir, she talks of the effects of the issues mentioned above such as coming up with excuses to fail attending classes and meeting with her classmates of friends. Moreoverm she narrates of troubled family and its effects on her development and also drug abuise by her mother and the issues she had to put up with.However, at her post secondary levelshe learns a few things in dealing with herself and presently, the novel is an evidence in her learningto deal with life and the baggages that came along with issues shse faced. Bullying a Cause of Social Phobia Indeed, it is a natural things for individuals to feel at peace when selected to address an audience espeuically those who are total strangers to you. Selfconsciousness and nervousness are results of not being comfortable whenan issue you do not like is being addressed by othersor you are addressing individuals whom you not share a perfect social relation with. Howeverm, the levels of the issue addressed abovearealways double henece they find it extremelydifficult to even communicate or respond to suggestions or questions posted to them. Doing something and receiving negative feedback from the audiences lead to social phobia. As Chelsea discusses in her memoir, emotional bullying often results to social phobia. A few years back while I was in junior school, I experienced bullying in various forms and most were always coming from my fellow classmates. I developed a phobia of speaking in class as each time I stood to address the class or my friends I would receive anxiety attack. The problem was caused due to my friends attitudes towards me as they always silent or booed me while addressing them or the teacher in class. I started feeling that I was always wrong and decided that it was best not to express myself in the presence of others as I feared that they would mock or laugh at my statements (Craig 126). The results were not quite pleasing because I ended up not participating completely in the classroom and this led to a decline in the performance of my academic and other co-curricular activities in the school. I did not feel the urge to have friends and even the thought of walking up and going to school was always odd. I decided to escape real childhood experiences by shifting my attention to other things like reading novels and spending a good fraction of my time on the internet playing games or doing other things. Moreover, I was not able to approach my classmates or friends for assistance as I feared being rejected, leading to me developing a negative attitude to all sorts of new interactions especially social interactions that came along my way (Craig 127). By being bullied in school, I developed a negative attitude towards wars or conflicts as I remember an incidence which saw me loose a tooth caused by a punch thrown by a classmate who was considered the toughest. I remember the pain I passed through and the difficulty I experienced in eating and swore creating a phobia in me or wars and conflicts. However, I believe that my military aspirations will enable me to overcome war phobia by helping me to understand the difference between such things like terrorism, wars and conflicts in a society or between societies. Secondly, I will overcome any sort of depression, which rises from the aftermaths of bullying, wars or conflicts as I will have learnt the precautionary ways of avoiding such like things. Bullying a Cause of Anxiety Anxiety is always considered as a mental health care problems for individuals experiencing it to the extremes. In most cases, it is always a barrier that prevents individuals fromleaving their life to the fullest. An example is when you are experiencing anxiety problems, you can effectively conduct normal chores being accomplished by normal people, you will have a feeling that you are not doing ij the right way. According to My true story of Fear, Anxiety and Social phobia (Louder words) by author Chelsea Swigget, anxiety is always a lasting effect of bullying. In my middle school and high school, I developed anxiety which was a result of bullying from my peers in school. I was obsessed over numerous things as I thought that by conducting or reacting a wrong manner, I would be a subject of ridicule hence resorted to worrying when faced with situations in my peer’s presence. Every time I expected to be asked questions on a particular topic in school, I would stress myself in reading the topics which were going to be discussed in class so as to be right in my answers to the teacher and to my fellow classmates. This later developed into a habit because I did not take my time to learn about the things which were being taught in the classroom rather waited for the moment when there were any questions to be answered in class to hurriedly pass through the points by cramming the essential points (Gladstone et al 202) The results of being laughed at in class for being wrongly led to me not laying little value in my exams as I thought my friends had not opportunity in bullying me during the exams, but only in normal class sessions. My grades were always not so impressive, especially in my middle school. The anxiety of being wrong was killing me as I was practically worrying over everything leading to a low self esteem which made interactions and participation in activities a problem to me. I was constantly embarrassed hence I was not able to relate my feelings to those parties like my teachers or parents to help me get the needed help. I believed that the only way to live was always to be perfect in everything I do, especially when it came to classroom matters. I was socially secluded and lonely as I saw that my friends and classmates were never supporting me in everything that I did. I developed anger which I directed at my siblings, parents and myself as I feared being rejected or bullied by them. Moreover, I lost trust in everybody. I thought that every good intention or deed coming from my friends and classmates were gestures of being mocked. I did not accept assistance of any level as constantly doubted those around me, little did I know that I was driving off the few individuals who would have become my friends, hence encouraging bullying from them as they sought friendship from those who my greatest bullies (Gladstone et al 205). At one particular moment, in my high school, I remember resorting to drugs to help in reducing my anxiety levels. I discovered a group of friends who smoked were during classroom hours and I joining them with an intent of gaining self confidence in the classroom and when socializing with my friends. Initially, this proved working for me as my participation level increased, but only for a few hours both inside and outside the classroom. In the same period, I discovered that society looked down upon individuals who were abusing the drugs as I remember that one day my mother found a stick of hang in my room and changed her attitude towards mefor almost a month. After constant advices from her and my elder brother, I stopped using the drug and started nurturing my dreams of one day joining the military. I believed that soldiers were less anxious individuals as they had been exposed to different war atrocities hence could easily put their anxiety level in check. Therefore, the only option I had then of controlling my anxiety levels was to join the military and share the experiences they pass through while in service in the country. Bullying a Cause of Fear According to My true story of Fear, Anxiety and Social phobia (Louder words) by author Chelsea Swigget, fear is an effect of bullying. To date, I have developed fear which is a painful emotion due to a strong sense of guilt, embarrassment or disgrace. I always strive to be perfect in everything I do and each time I do something wrong I always develop a sense of guilt and shame. This has led into believing that mistake on my side are like a curse because I fear being judged harshly for the mistakes by my friends or mates. In addition, my fears have resulted in me developing a feeling of disgrace each time I do something wrong. The results have not augured well with my friends in school as I always go into seclusion upon realizing my mistakes. My main reason for being secluded is that I always believe that my friends are justified in administering any sort of punishment for the mistakes I committed. As a result, I have lost myself confidence and self esteem, making me reluctant in taking roles or making decisions when around my friends or at school as I feel that I am a failure and all activities which I undertake are doomed to fail. This has been further worsened by some of my friends who always rejoice or mock me each time I make a mistake. I always take their comments negatively as believing that I deserve the negative comments coming from them. All this has increased my aspirations of joining the military as I believe that in so doing, I will be able to overcome my fears in life. I believe that I will able to gather self confidence and control over myself and those around me as I have always had stories of war and their aftermaths. By being a soldier, I will alienate the element of fear in me as I will be part of those responsible for the effects of war experienced by the civilians or the enemies. Secondly, I will learn about how to handle confusion which I normally experience each time I experience fear in things I am doing. The military training will endow me with strategies to use when faced with situations, hence the ability to make quick decisions in different circumstances and even in my personal life. Lastly, I will offer my isolations which is a result of bullying from my friends and classmates as the military will teach on the importance of teamwork in a group. Today, I have received a lot of advices from my friends who say that the fear I developed as a result of bullying can be reduced by being spiritual. They have further illustrated this using the presence of God and Satan. An example is that they have always asked to picture a world where there was no God but only Satan explaining that it was eminent for people to live in fear as Satan is associated with negative things. However, being that spiritual teaching advices all those who live in fear to turn to God, people no longer live in fear as they believe that someone is watching and protecting them from all sorts of evil intents or situation (Marsh, Abigail, Elise & Cardinal 97). Conclusion In conclusion, bullying is a weird behavior that is not socially acceptable to many in the society. Pause for a moment and ask yourself on the more than a thousand ways you willp be probably affected when you are the victim or the peptrator, what do you gain? The psychological torture, the fear, anxiety, social phobias developed in the process? Be you, stop bullying. In her memoir, My true story of Fear, Anxiety and Social phobia (Louder words), Chelsea Swigget raises various points which are associated with bullying and explains different ways of overcoming fears, anxiety and social phobia. She writes of her personal experiences in the memoir, her fears, phobias, anxiety problems and the process and challenges that she had to pass through to be normal and once again in the society. In spite of overcoming her challenges, theexperiences to her are imbedded in her mind and she tries to let them go by through therapy in expressing or talking about them in her memor. It is quite interesting, but what of those of individuals who fail to overcome the effects caused as a result of bullying? Will they forever linger in a world where they constantly live fears, phobias oranxiety problems.Factors like personality, psychological factors, bad childhood experiences and poor parenting strategies all contributes to bullying. In spite of all the contributing factors of bullying, in my opinion their effects of bullying are much greater than the benefits as at times they leave permanent scars which may take an individual a period to heal. I hope that by the time I graduate from this college to venture into the real world, I will be able to do something positive to help in curbing the rate at which bullying is being practiced by various individuals in the society. I strongly believe that bullying is not a moral thing to be practiced by all individuals as it has a potential capacity of leading to death or resulting to permanent bad behavior. Works Cited Craig, Wendy M. "The relationship among bullying, victimization, depression, anxiety, and aggression in elementary school children." Personality and individual differences 24.1 (1998): 123-130. Gladstone, Gemma L., Gordon B. Parker, and Gin S. Malhi. "Do bullied children become anxious and depressed adults?: A cross-sectional investigation of the correlates of bullying and anxious depression." The Journal of nervous and mental disease 194.3 (2006): 201-208. Marsh, Abigail A., and Elise M. Cardinale. "When psychopathy impairs moral judgments: neural responses during judgments about causing fear." Social cognitive and affective neuroscience (2012): nss097. Swiggett, Chelsea R. Rae: [my True Story of Fear, Anxiety, and Social Phobia]. Deerfield Beach, Fla: HCI Teens/Health Communications, 2010. Print. Read More