Understanding body language - Essay Example

"Its how you looked when you said it, not what you actually said" wrote Pease & Pease. This line explains how human body is communicating when the lips are talking or sealed. Verbal communication is a very recent human development and humans have relied on body language for much more years. Pease & Pease(.com) write that, "The ability to read a person's attitudes and thoughts by their behavior was the original communication system used by humans before spoken language evolved." Pease and Pease (.com) while talking about Mehrabian write that, "The total impact of a message is about 7 percent verbal (words only) and 38 percent vocal (including tone of voice, inflection, and other sounds) and 55 percent nonverbal." Humans have the ability to send out signals without themselves being aware and these gestures are very influential to communication. Wood (.com) writes, "You can send and receive up to 10,000 non-verbal cues in less than one minute of interaction." To convey a particular message, our body and actions automatically behave in a certain manner to get the 'real' message through even when we don't want to.Pease & Pease (.com) while discussing Birdwhistell, who estimated that we only utter words for 10 to 11 minutes a day. Like Mehrabian, the pioneer of body language, he showed through his experiments that "face-to-face conversation is less than 35 percent and that over 65 percent of communication is done nonverbally." These non-verbal clues can help us to detect deception, but may vary according to the culture. It is human nature to deceive. Deception can put into practice very easily. The gestures which become visible on a deceiver's face are not in his control. Many politicians have even kept personal trainers of body language, which train them to show that they are honest and caring. In reality it is opposite. Human beings trick each other and hide their true feelings and can get away with it. But if the listener is a well - trained observer, he can very easily detect deception through an involuntary process of uncontrollable gestures appearing on the body and the face of human being while deceiving. Wood (.com) writes that, "No matter how much you want to control it, your nonverbal behavior gives clues to how you are truly feeling." Indeed, it is a touch job to spot deception but it is not impossible. Dr Ekman, in his book 'Telling Lies' writes that, "The face can be a valuable source for the lie catcher." Wood (.com) tells us briefly how our different body parts show what we want to hide. He calls them 'windows.' Wood (.com) writes that, "There are windows at the bottom of the feet, the kneecaps, the bottom of the torso, the middle of the chest, the neck, the mouth and eyes and the top of the head." These all can become useful in assessing deception and give silent cues. Taylor says that "To study of detecting dishonesty or lies, investigators have found several other avenues of study useful. Some interviewers use body language or kinesics, neuro-linguistic processing and observation of facial micro-expressions" to pinpoint it. (188) The term "Kinesics" was coined was Birdwhistell, who was founder of the theory of nonverbal communication and called it "kinesics"(Pease& Pease.) This term is very vast and covers the gaze, posture, actions and language use. (Taylor 188.) Face is the window to the brain and a very important indicator. Dr Ekman stresses that, "The face often contains two messages - what the liar wants to show and what the lie wants to conceive." The suppression of facial expression also indicates that the person is hiding something. Some times, unintentionally, liar puts something in between the interviewers because he "is uncomfortable facing his questioner/accuser and may turn his head or body away" (Blifaloo.com.) Most of the investigators in this field believe that the "Eyes have it all." Taylor says that, "Neurolinguistic processing or programming deals with careful assessment of the eye movement as individual accesses data from the brain in response to questions" (188.) Anne Amos writes that," Eye contact is one of the most important things people notice" (24.)But on the other hand liar is also prone to avoid eye contact (Blifaloo.com) or look at the sides showing guilty (Wood.com.)Wood (.com) while agreeing with Taylor also suggests that the eye movement is very crucial. Wood (.com) writes; People tend to look up to the right to visualize or create a new response or down to the right to create the sounds of a new response. We recall information that occurred in the past by looking up to the left or down to the left." Pupils of the eyes have a different story to tell, Wood claims that, "Dilated pupils mean that person is interested" and vice versa. Taylor going into further details of the eye movement writes that, The premise in neuro-linguistics is that our eye moves in one direction as we access 'memory'. It is a sign of possible deception if the eyes move in a way that indicate the mind is creating new information in response to a question about a crime (189.) The maximum research is done on the eye movement while pin pointing deception. The other facial parts like too often touching the nose or lips also show that person wants to distract the interviewers. Wood (.com) writes that, "Tight lips indicate you may be planning to keep the truth in and biting the lips means anticipation or holding something back, changing minds." We all, at some point, fake a smile, and it is very easy to tell. It only involves the lips not the whole face. Blifaloo(.com) comments, "Expressions are limited to mouth movements when someone is faking emotions (like happy, surprised, sad, awe, )instead of the whole face." The hands are also cue able. Limited movement of hands and stiffness also tells the interviewers that something is wrong. Wood (.com) writes that, "Spot a liar by looking for someone who is too stiff and still."Excessive movement also shows discomfort as Blifaloo(.com) writes that the liar's , "Hands touching their face, throat & mouth. Touching or scratching the nose or behind their ear. Not likely to touch his chest/heart with an open hand." Discomfort is also shown by folded arms (Anne Amos 25.) Wood (.com) claims that , " When people lie spontaneously, they tend to spend more time gesturing with hands and using adapters, such as scratching the body or playing with a pen than someone who is just nervous." Along with arms, moderate movement of feet is also recommended by the trainers. Anne Amos says that, "beware of crossing and uncrossing your legs several times; it shows nervousness and fidgety" (26.) Tapping of foot also shows nervousness (Wood .com.)Similarly excessive or stiff body movement and shifting position gives us various hints. Wood (.com) says that, "Slow shifting weight usually means that someone is distracted, uncomfortable and bored." Besides the body language, speech patterns also indicate deception. Changing speech patterns tells the interviewers that person is playing too smart.More often there are situations where the spoken words don't match the non-verbal communication and people end up trusting the body language (Wood.com.) In other scenario, Blifaloo(.com) writes that, "Gestures/expressions don't match the verbal statement." These contradictions are very important to judge the person. We all need to take some time out to observe each other. Body language and the language itself, help us to get closer to each other and develop better understanding. It is not all about words and communication but these non verbal signs are also very significant to our lives. If we have some understanding of these, it can help us in our professional and personal lives. References Amos, Julie-Ann. Handling tough job interviews: be prepared, perform well, get the job. Oxford: How To Books Ltd, 2004. "How to Detect Lies." Blifaloo.com. 26 June 2009 < http://www.blifaloo.com/info/lies.php > --- Ekman, Paul. Telling lies: clues to deceit in the marketplace, politics, and marriage. New Yorl: W.W. Norton, 2001 Pease, Barbara, and Allan Pease. "Understanding The Basics." E Not Alone. 26 June Taylor, Karen T. Forensic art and illustration. Florida: CRC Press, 2000. Wood, Patti. 'Body Honesty in Customer Service: Understanding Deception and Credibility Cues." Expert Magazine. 28 April 2003. 26 June 2009 Read More