Money and Love: A Glimpse into the Sociology of Money - Essay Example

Money and Love: A glimpse into the sociology of money. Love makes the world go round or so the saying goes, but for the modern capitalist man, "money" could easily take the place of "love" in that sentence, much like in the case of Jack Campbell in the movie, The Family Man (2000). This movie challenges us to look at our own life closely, to remember the difficult crossroads that we had to pass through to get to where we are. More importantly, the "what ifs" that we secretly harbor about what our life could have been if we had chosen a different path. Money and Love, for me, are the real stars in this movie; the actors just lent their talent in the telling of this universal story. In this movie we are faced with two extreme situations, monetary success versus personal success in the form of a happy family - we are not given any middle ground. This set-up makes it all the more difficult and compelling, would choosing money make us shallow individuals and would choosing the latter make us hypocrites The movie shows Jack Campbell, big shot Wall Street Broker bachelor, living the American dream. On the day of the biggest deal of his career he wakes up in a different home and is thrust into an entirely different world where he has a wife and two children. It was comedic the way Jack tried to hang on to his sanity with the changes around him, but I also felt sympathetic to his character. Knowing where he was coming from and what his priorities were before he had this glimpse of what could have been helped make his character feel more real, more human. While the whole movie is a lesson on deciding what really "matters", there were two scenes that I consider very crucial in the story. The first is the scenes where Jack said "I took the road less traveled" when asked about what happened to his relationship with Kate Reynolds, his college girlfriend. That particular sentence, although seemingly general at first, gives an entirely different story if we take it into the context of what Jack has become. Jack and Kate, back then, were already at that point in their relationship when marriage was already a given. He promised Kate that he will be back after finishing an internship in London for one year, but he never came back to her. This was the road less traveled. In many happy-ending stories, he would have honored his promise and they would have faced the world together, but he chose not to. It is safe to say that he viewed his dream and Kate as two opposing forces that he had to choose from. Between love and money, it is easy to see which won in Jack's case. As a successful Wall Street broker, Jack epitomizes the view that human worth equals financial success as reiterated by Neisser1. He believes that he has everything that he'll ever need, yet his thirst for material things cannot be denied and he is sadly lacking in true friends. He lives in a superficial world where no emotion is deep enough to be considered pure or honest - but the thing is, that truth can only be seen by us, the viewers. Jack is oblivious to the impersonal relationship that he has with the people around him. In the social sphere that he was portrayed to be living in, money has removed the personal element in human relationships2. Everything is automatic; everything appears to have been designed to cater to the appetite of the affluent at the snap of their fingers - women, things, etc. Had Jack taken the road more traveled, he knew that he would not be where he is, and at that point, when he was having that conversation with his colleague, he was sure that he made the right choice. Although, personally, I think being in his comfort zone helped support Jack's perception of what was important to him. To say that this scenario was brought about by capitalism would be an untruth. Truth be told, people have been balancing the choice between money and love for centuries, what makes it more obvious at present is the big rift between the financial standing of the affluent versus the majority which highlights just how high the stakes are in making the right choice. Children are reminded by their parents to prioritize their careers and let their romantic relationships take a back seat until they are stable. Young professionals are romanticized with the glamour of high living and are fueled by the adage - work hard, play hard. One scene that I find poignant and full of meaning is the scene where Kate gave Jack a suit during their anniversary. The suit was similar to the expensive one that he was drawn to in a store but could not afford. Jack may not have been satisfied by the suit, but the gesture overwhelmed him.3 It was unfortunate that Kate only saw a lack of enthusiasm over the suit. For Kate, the gift became a gauge of Jacks satisfaction with his married life. That it was given on their anniversary makes it more significant as it also served to reaffirm their relationship.4 For her, the more expensive suit represented the life that she knew Jack dreamt of back in college - a life of money and power. It represented his life without her. The cheaper suit, on the other hand, may be interpreted according to its lower economic value5 as a mere shadow of what Jack's life could have been. Subconsciously, Kate may feel responsible for Jack's not being able to achieve his dream. And whether Kate knew it or not when she bought the cheaper suit, there was a lot at stake for her piece of mind when she gave it to Jack. The acceptance of the suit that she bought would have been confirmation that Jack is happy with the life that he has with her and that given another chance, Jack would still have chosen her. It is also because of this underlying guilt and fear, that Kate was not able to see how Jack was touched by the gesture. In her eyes, she only saw what she feared the most, that Jack was no longer happy. In Jack's corner, the gift is something different altogether. Jack was touched by the gesture. For him the gift, although not as expensive as the suit he wanted, was a symbol of his wife's effort to give him what he wanted. Since his wife handled the finances of the family, it follows that she will have to work around what was left of their money after the purchase. The gift may also have evoked feelings of guilt from Jack for having shown his weakness for expensive suits that let to his wife spending on something he really did not need in his "current life". The suit served to contrast his materialism to Kate's desire to please him. It painted him as insensitive, and painted his wife as selfless. This scene also shows the difference in spending habits as a bachelor over spending as a married man. Jack's mindset was still on spending "his" money, whereas Kate was already all about spending "our" money. This "our money" mindset takes into consideration the needs of the entire family, thus it is more practical and has an element of delaying gratification and of "sacrifice". That Kate chose to buy him a suit to make him happy is synonymous to Kate putting his personal needs before the needs of the family. This realization may have humbled Jack as well. It became clearer to Jack that the cost of a gift is not the real measure of its worth, rather, it is the thought and sacrifice that went into its giving. I appreciated how this scene was able to show in subtle nuances how the act of giving and the gift is viewed by the giver and the receiver. It reminds us how a gift is no longer just a gift, but a question that will be answered by how the receiver reacts to it, more eloquently that any spoken word. It was not really surprising that Jack would warm-up to his new life once he got to appreciate the warmth of love coming from his family, which paints a stark contrast to the cold life he once thought so highly of. Nevertheless, he does not entirely think that money cannot contribute to the happiness of his family, which is why Jack decided that he wanted both money and his family. But as in any relationship, one cannot decide for both. When Jack presented his case to his wife, Kate was opposed to the idea saying that she was not consulted and Jack wanted to uproot the entire family. Both Jack and Kate have their personal reasons for their decisions - Jack wanted to have the best of both worlds and Kate was resisting possibly because of pride. That Jack wanted to move to New York is yet another indication that he was no longer satisfied with their life. The movie made me examine my own life as a function of love and money. Where do I stand What would I answer if asked "what do you need" If there is only one choice, what would I choose What the movie left us is the theoretical answer - Love triumphs all. The movie presented money as the antagonist and love as the protagonist. But as a viewer, I cannot help but wonder if it is really not possible to have both. We may want to achieve the financial freedom that money and success can give us, but is it not true that as social creatures, we also crave to feel truly loved and cherished as well If we were Jack, is the choice really just between money and love Surely, the choices cannot be purely black or white; there must be shades of gray in between where we can all find that perfect combination to suit our needs. Read More