Dying, Death, and Grieving Processes - Essay Example

? Death, Dying and Grieving Processes BY YOU YOUR SCHOOL INFO HERE HERE Death, Dying and Grieving Processes Part Before taking the I understood very little about the death, dying and grief other than personal experience with lost loved ones in my family structure. I think that most adults periodically think about death and dying, wondering what the ultimate implications might be from a spiritual perspective. However, these feelings become more potent, in my personal experience, when dealing with a legitimate death of someone that was closely related or intimate with the individual. Before engaging with the course materials, death and dying was something that rarely crossed my personal thoughts, sometimes being sparked by violent films or news reports illustrating that someone had been murdered or was killed in an auto or airline accident. The inherent human values oftentimes bring up feelings of personal empathy for the victims of devastating accidents or crimes, which, to me, has been the foundation of my understanding about death and dying. When learning about the respected hypothesis offered by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, I learned much more about the sociological and psychological implications related to death and the grieving process that most people experience. The Kubler-Ross model states that individuals will go through a denial phase, followed by anger, bargaining, depression and ultimately an acceptance phase where bereavement is no longer as powerful as during the period when the individual lost their favorite friend or loved one. Now, my personal experiences with death have not been significantly unbearable as individuals that I have lost in my life were not intimately close, but were usually extended family members that died of natural causes due to old age. Therefore, these deaths were expected by family members which gave many of my family time to prepare for its inevitability. However, this course taught me about the complexities of grieving and the impact of death on people that were extremely close to those they have lost. What I found particular interesting about the stages of dying and bereavement that is provided by Kubler-Ross is the denial stage. In this stage, the person who has lost someone often refuses to believe that the situation has happened, a form of defense mechanism that helps shelter the person from having to deal with the complicated emotions and anguish that they are experiencing (Santrock, 2007). When I reflected back on situations in my personal life where someone I have known has died, I thought about several family members that were much closer to the person who passed on. When they were confronted by empathetic family members, they always kept a proverbial “stiff upper lip”, indicating they would be fine and there was no need for over-compensation and intense emotional comfort. This class helped me to understand that the psychological theories about denial as a defense mechanism are very relevant for certain types of personalities. Henslin (2005) describes the phenomenon of denial as a defense mechanism, suggesting that sometimes emotions are simply too powerful for a person to deal with effectively and their unconscious shuts down so as not to have to evaluate their true emotional state. The death and grieving model provided by Kubler-Ross added a lot of support for the sociological perspective on why people choose to deny certain events so that their consciousness has time to cope with stress, anguish and a variety of extremely negative circumstances. Kubler-Ross (1969) helps to explain why denial is such a universal theme. According to the author, people have an unconscious fear of death because there is too much uncertainty about what happens to the soul upon exiting the planet. She states that it is “unconscionable” for people to believe that their lives are finite and people tend to think about death only as being feasible when it is taken by another or some other form of external malicious force (Kubler-Ross, 1969). This is why death has taken on a cultural negative connotation over time and why most people think of death as a substantially pessimistic situation. When thinking about the course teachings in the class, I made a very important correlation between the psychological tendency of people, the influence of culture in determining how death is perceived and evaluated, and why people automatically tend to deny that it has occurred. With the aforementioned being said, there was one concept that was mentioned in the class about providing a comfortable environment and showing compassion to those that were grieving for a loved one. This seems to be a common theme with many experts and organizations that deal with dying and bereavement. However, upon reflection, I have found that people have very different personalities and have to deal with their emotions in their own ways, either privately or publicly. I think it would be important to assess the type of coping skills and personality traits that people have before trying to approach them with empathy, as they might be going through denial or anger in the Kubler-Ross stages and will not respond as the intervening person believes they should. What really made an impression on me was the complexity of human behavior that is usually associated with death and dying, such as bargaining with a higher force, making promises that if the individual were returned, they would sacrifice their life savings or make some other concession. This is irrational behavior as there are no precedents of the dead being returned to loved ones, which made me realize that death and dying can produce extremely irrational responses that would have implications for health care providers and counseling services. I suppose the largest learning lesson was that people are very capable of irrational thinking, though not completely unexpected or surprising, which seems to complicate the process of healing and finally reaching the stage of acceptance that is absolutely necessary for the struggling person to move forward with their lives. I think that dealing with the reality of death helps an individual to be more realistic about their own mortality, which is also necessary to be a healthy and well-adjusted adult since it is not healthy, long-term, to shut out realism in favor of a delusion. Part II Before taking the class, my general opinion of euthanasia had been a sort of live and let live philosophy, believing that these decisions should be maintained within a family unit. There are clearly many individuals in society that are struggling with major illnesses, mostly terminal, the provide victims with considerable pain and anguish both physical and mental. Too many times, I have personally witnessed the media reporting on certain individuals (such as Dr. Jack Kevorkian) that try diligently to assist people in ending this pain using more humane needs. I never thought much about these situations other than that I felt the government was far too involved in trying to keep people from helping their relatives that have asked for assisted suicide. After taking the class, it really just reinforced these same feelings I had about euthanasia and assisted suicide. As I mentioned previously in Part I, I find that one of the most common values and emotions that people try to provide others that are suffering is empathy. For some people, their illnesses that are making them consider assisted suicide are long-term, meaning that they will suffer physical pain, depression, and a whole basket of negative emotions while they try to live a normal life and come to grips with the reality of their situation. Again, I feel there is enough evidence that the situation should be determined with the individual wanting assisted suicide and those who are close to the person. The course taught the students about some of the cultural conflicts that are associated with euthanasia and its social implications in different countries that have very different values than that of the United States. So, in reflection, I had to think about whether evolved cultural characteristics of different countries or regions of the world should be taken into consideration when making a judgment call about the appropriateness of both euthanasia and assisted suicide. For example, many Asian cultures are very collectivist and they have very strong connections with their blood-related family members where loyalty and respect are taught at a very early age. This gives people a chance to get to know their grandfathers, grandmothers and extended secondary kin in a way that is different from the United States. So, not being particularly close to, for example, my second cousins, I would likely be more tolerant about the individual wanting assisted suicide to beat their difficult illnesses. In another country, however, it might be considered a significant atrocity (such as in collectivist cultures) to even think about putting their family members to death or assisting in their self-demise. The line between euthanasia and suicide is absolutely blurred, as there is little difference between the two. Euthanasia involves taking a direct involvement in putting another to death, usually with a lethal injection delivered by the practicing physician. Assisted suicide is usually just handing the materials necessary for the individual to end their lives without taking active participation in the death process. Either way, some external force is gathering what is necessary for the individual to be put to death. Therefore, it would be highly irresponsible to consider one acceptable and another unacceptable since they both meet with the same outcomes and, in some instances, have the ability to stop a very long-term bout of suffering for individuals that are begging for one or the other. Again, as I mentioned previously, empathic feelings for people who are suffering are largely universal. Most people know what it is like to experience pain and suffering and have therefore become familiarized with the difficulty and complicated emotional states of battling illness or trying to heal from a certain injury. When determining whether either euthanasia or assisted suicide should be considered acceptable, I am forced to look at my own experiences with suffering and then step into the other person’s proverbial shoes and imagine how I would feel if I were faced with this decision where death is really the only way out of the suffering. Family members and friends of the distressed individual also do not want to stand about helplessly watching their favorite comrade or intimate family member endure misery and agony as this can also have very intense and long-lasting psychological damage. People seem to have a self-protection mechanism that is inherent and nobody wants to torment over their vulnerability in being unable to provide support or help for the individual. I think this justifies both euthanasia and especially assisted suicide when the individual is capable and competent to ask for it. Now, I recognize through the class that euthanasia is not always voluntary and individuals are sometimes not advised it is about to occur. This causes me some problems since the only crime the individual has committed is being old or otherwise unable to speak for themselves. If the person is a financial burden to the family and the doctor chooses to euthanize even though there are no significant health problems, then I would have to be opposing since this is more selfish and designed to free the caretakers of their financial or emotional burdens. This class really helped me put situations in perspective for both euthanasia and assisted suicide and the situations that make both acceptable or unacceptable. For that I am grateful, as I may one day be in this position as the sufferer or the witness unable to help another with their misery. Having explained my position, I have to say that my stand has not changed altogether too much since taking the class. I still believe government is far too involved in trying to stop the process, especially in the United States, and I believe that there are certain mitigating circumstances where both should be allowed. This class reinforced that there are many that think it is a deplorable practice that are preventing many people internationally from being able to make the right decisions for the person and their families when either euthanasia or assisted suicide is really the best option. References Henslin, James M. (2005). Sociology: A Down to Earth Approach (7th ed.). Boston: A&B Publishing. Kubler-Ross, Elizabeth. (1969). On Death and Dying: What the dying have to teach doctors, nurses, clergy and their own families. New York: Touchstone. Santrock, J.W. (2007). A Topical Approach to Life-Span Development. New York: McGraw-Hill. Read More