In Search of Roots - Assignment Example

?Learning Autobiography: A Self-Assessment Introduction This autobiographical sketch is being undertaken mainly to fulfil the requirements for my application for a degree in General Business. Other than this, I also welcome the opportunity that this exercise provides, to obtain a new perspective on my life. In the course of writing this essay, aspects of my life which are relegated to the background in the course of everyday routine are recalled, and in their recollection new insights are discovered that adds meaning to the daily toil. New significance is derived from childhood events, the circumstances of early adulthood and finally the coming into life’s fullness as a parent. When the events of early life are seen through the eyes of later life, there is the poignant realization that everything that came before, both the good and the bad, helped make us what we are today, and that the failures and obstacles are but stepping stones to the eventual realization of our most brilliant successes. In search of roots I never knew the love of a father. Even before I was born, he left my mother and me for a reason I could not fathom, and for which I assumed I was the cause. This left me with lifelong feelings of abandonment, of a deep-seated insecurity that the man who created me did not feel me worthy of his love and attention, or even the curiosity of seeing the child he helped bring into this world. Leaving an indelible mark on my self-image, I had always felt that life had dealt me an unfair hand from the moment I left the womb. Even my entry into formal schooling brought a keen reminder of my deficiencies in things that my peers merely took for granted. I began schooling at the age of six, entering the educational system for the first time directly into the first grade. I found this to be quite a disadvantage, considering that my classmates had gone to preschool and had a year’s head start; I, on the other hand, was quite disoriented. I lacked the social skills and formal conditioning my classmates had been able to avail of in kindergarten, a year level I had to skip because my mom, for reasons of her own, preferred not to send me there. As a result, I was an extremely shy child, and constantly uncertain of how to act in class. I was afraid to raise my hand, afraid to ask questions, or to volunteer answers. I was at one time aloof from my classmates, in the same sense as one who is an outsider in an exclusive club where everyone else belonged. The feeling of disorientation in school severely limited my ability to realize my potential and my learning experiences in the formal educational system, but at another level it sparked a different type of learning, that is, learning how to cope with my disadvantages, and that I needed to strive harder, jump higher, and run farther than many of my peers just to keep up. I see this as a parallel learning process to that which goes on in the classroom. It is a coming to terms with oneself. Another thing I remember about my childhood was my constant uprooting. It seemed that we moved constantly – twice in the second grade, once in the fourth grade and once in the fifth grade. Moving is not as simple as it appears to be, and moving often can be just short of devastating to a child. Because I attended 4 different grammar schools, I was not able to form relationships with my peers. It was always so difficult to leave people I was becoming close to, so I chose not to get close to anyone. I have always pushed people away very easily. The child in me had not since been able to repose any deep measure of trust on other people. I was a drifter who did not stay long enough anywhere to take root and draw nourishment; to a certain degree my soul was the poorer because of it. People who have fixed residences and who’ve lived in their homes for decades take for granted the things they accumulate in the attic (or basement or garage) through the years, little mementos or trinkets, photos and articles of clothing, that help them recall events, people, emotions linked to their past. People who constantly move have little of that, if at all. Every move meant disposing of the things that do not appear to be particularly important at that time – the very things that would have been priceless someday, like the feeling one gets when coming back to the home of his childhood. I did not have that. As a child, ‘home” was little more than a place to put one’s suitcase in for the moment. The last move in the fifth grade was most welcome, and I had just begun to get comfortable at my grammar school when I was again uprooted, this time to go to high school. It meant going through another major change once more, but this time I gained comfort in the fact that I was not alone in making the change, that the entire graduating class was going through it, too. In a way, it felt like not being alone even when I was alone, and that to me was the closest approximation to normality in my young life. My childhood may seem rather sad, but in hindsight I believe I was made of tougher stuff than what television soaps would have us believe we are made of. As an adult, I had been able to establish my own roots. I had married in 2003, began college in 2006, became a parent in 2007, and once more in 2008. Last year I had transferred to another college, in my continued search for new knowledge and a brighter, more meaningful future. What inspires me to forge on now are my children; they are the beacon that guides me home, that same home I had been in search of as a child. At one time I had felt I had nobody to anchor my trust in. Now I find this trust in my children, and I am resolved to provide for them the stability and security that I understand now are the foundation for a life of self-fulfilment. It is for this reason that I have decided to return to school, and for me the best school that I believe could help me attain this goal is DePaul SNL. Conclusion Throughout my most impressionable years, I had searched for meaning, stability, and growth in life. I have had to conquer my shyness and fear, and I have learned to draw insights from the lessons of life as much as the classroom. Having attained the basics, I am now eager to learn more, to attain a level of education that can provide me and my children a firm foundation with which to face the future. I now understand what my mother, with all her good intentions, did not comprehend, that education is the key to realizing the limitless potentials open for us all. I hope to anchor my future in a degree in General Business, and beyond that, a possible MBA, simply because I believe I can. If this thirst for learning is all I could leave as a legacy to my children, then that is sufficient, because I would be leaving them the world of infinite possibilities. Wordcount = 1,250 words Read More