Are Social Networking Cites a Gateway to Infidelity - Research Paper Example

? ARE SOCIAL NETWORKING CITES A GATEWAY TO INFIDELITY? Introduction Internet use has become wide spread all over the world. Internethas greatly been used as a social site that people can share different ideas about the world around them. People who share same views about the world are able to communicate easily through the internet than those who do not. The internet has helped in economic social and political development. Economically different entrepreneurs have seen the need for this technology in developing their businesses. Customers can be linked through the internet at the same time goods can be advertised through the internet. This paper will focus on how social networking has greatly led to promotion of infidelity in the society. Social networking websites have had a long history in our society but the period at which it made its breakthrough was in the twenty first century specifically in 2004. The main reason for invention of these sites was to bring people together; they can be either close friends or strangers who have common interests. The internet does not restrict one to communicating to his specific friends but rather have a chance to meet new people and create new relationships. Face book is one of the most popular website all over the world; most people have embraced this social networking in facilitating communication. It is no wonder that some have even adopted it ii carrying out businesses. This is made possible by carrying out advertisements, the reason why most business people adopt this website is the population that uses face book, and business people understand that they are able to get their target market through face book. Apart from face book, there are other social networks that have greatly affected peoples life’s, they include, MySpace, black planet, linked in, twitter and Habbo. Popularity of each website is influenced by factors like race, ethnic and nationality (Buss, 2000 ). As much as the internet has contributed to far-reaching advantages to an individual, other factors have affected negatively to the well being of the society. According to research levels of infidelity are becoming rampant, a factor that has been promoted by social networking. Internet leads to easy access of different individuals of different sexes. The reason to why this has been made possible is the capability of sharing instant messages between different parties by use of emails. Due to this, most marriages have broken leaving most couples single (McKenry, 2009). Different social network websites have different features that have facilitated easy communication between different individuals. It is easy to choose what gender to communicate to due to availability of one’s profile outlining all details about a person. MySpace for example, allows one to view one profile, which include a photograph. These sites have posed a challenge to most marriages in the sense that, most married men and women participate in flirting using different social networks. Some do not uphold the values of marriage nor societal requirements on marriage but rather, have their own egocentric interests they would like to fulfill. When some couples are faced with challenges in marriage, they choose to seek solace from social networking website. A woman who does not have a voice in her marriage for example, may choose to use the internet as a way of seeking recognition and appreciation from other men, something she does receive from her husband (Harvey, 2006). THE NEW AGE OF CHEATING: ONLINE INFIDELITY Emergence of computers is one of the reasons to why internet access has become worldwide. People are now able to get information faster than it was in the past years. People are able to access information through different means for instance, uses of emails, different chat rooms have been introduced to facilitate faster communication and finally use of instant messaging. People are allowed to use different identities while chatting online, therefore if not carefully used the internet can lead to one exposing his or her private life to a harmful person. Most married people would never like to be associated with marriage when using social networking, some with the notion that marriage makes them loose their market value they therefore disguise themselves as single (Gonyea 2004). This attracts other desperate individuals who are interested in marriage only to realize later that they were living a lie. Lesbianism in marriage is highly promoted by the use social networking websites, some women due to frustration seek for sexual satisfaction from their fellow women they believe that this will help in solving their problems and lowering the level of stress (Riedmann, 2011).. They therefore engage in flirting with their fellow women claiming that women understand them better than men. Their peers, who try to convince them that it is a sure way of having life full of fun, lure some married individuals into engaging in these evil habits. Individuals who engage in this habits claim that, flirting is not a form of cheating in marriage but rather having fun. Those who justify themselves through this argument forget that, some of this habits could lead to emotional attachment. Some men and women abandon their families to be with partners they met through social networking websites like face book. The reason why most people prefer meeting partners online is that, they will not be rejected because they can use different means of attracting the public (Marshall, 2011). One of the ways used is uploading a photograph that looks more attractive than one think he or she is. Some people take this flirting to the next level by meeting their social friends. Consequences of infidelity caused by social networking websites are hard to bear with after the harm they cause to the entire family. The partner’s welfare is affected together with that of the children. Most couples resort to divorce as the only way of solving their problem. Infidelity also causes HIV/AIDS, among the partners, this comes about when one or both partners engage in irresponsible with partners met through the internet. Divorce and HIV/AIDS greatly affect the kids who are forced to lose either one of their parents or both (McKenry, 2009). SIGNS YOUR PARTNER IS CHEATING ONLINE A study by Caplan (2009) reveals that there various Factors to put in considerations when you attempt to investigate whether your spouse is a victim of online infidelity, some of the behavioral factors to note include; Secretive use of the internet –the spouse is ever in need of privacy while using the internet whether at home or in the cyber. This exhibit when he/she suddenly switch windows or shut down the machine when you abruptly find him/she using the internet Consistent deleting their path- when you notice your partner is ever deleting his/her cookies and browsing history in the browser. This is a clear indication something is being hidden from you. Multiple and secretive Email accounts- when you found out that your spouse has several email accounts that you are not familiar with them. This emails accounts are likely the path they get connected to secret lovers online or where they get notifications from websites advertising secret lovers or new people. Use of internet excessively- does your partner use the internet extra-ordinary especially during odd hours such late night when you have gone to bed and when you are not in the house? For sure there is a good hidden reason why he/she does so. Protects passwords automatically – when you notice that your partner PC or laptop is locked, so that do not have accessibility to his/her documents or you can’t use it at all and he/she is not willing to provide the password to you or they prefer logging in for you, then it is a clear indication you spouse is a victim or online infidelity HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING SPOURSE ONLINE If your partner show the above characteristics then it is high time to carry out some investigation in order to determine whether the spouse is cheating online. Today, there are various reputable users friendly software’s designed to monitor user’s computer activities. This software’s are designed to run in the background concurrently and are unnoticeable by the computer user. They record user activities and by this alone you can find screen captures of what your partner has been doing, they also show online chats and even alert you when sensitive words such as love and sex have been used in the chats (Wysocki & Childers, 2011) Indeed infidelity has caused most marriages and relationships to fail across the world. With the advancement of the technology and the internet, cheating has been manipulated in various forms and become more widespread to an extent its definition alone has been modified by most individual to incorporate an aspect of online relationships. According to Divorcemag.com (a website designed to help partners determine when their spouses are victims of online infidelity or not and if so, how to catch them) it is estimated 46-51% of women in marriage and 51-61% of married me are directly engaged in extramarital relationships at least at some point in their marriage. According to Hertlein (2006), it is advisable as a potential wife or husband not to be left out of this current issue ‘‘online infidelity’’. With the ever increasing population and increased accessibility to gadgets like cell phones, personal computers and the internet it becoming harder to catch a relationship trickster and cheating on your partner has been made much more easier. These figures are upsetting; this is worsened by the fact that they were taken from a study carried out nearly five years down the line previous to the existence of the current fashionable social networking and online dating websites (Caplan 2009). More so, a large number of individuals have engaged themselves in internet communication since then. CONCLUSION Social networking websites have several advantages to the well being of an individual. Through the internet, people are able to share different issues that affect their life, in addition to that, are able to make new friends. These among others are the advantages of social networking websites. The effects the internet has had on the marriage institution cannot be ignored. Most marriages have faced divorce due to infidelity that is realized through social networking leaving behind to suffer. Hope has not yet been realized to help curb this problem; more is expected if action is not taken due to ever-growing technology. Refferences Buss, D. M. (2000). The evolution of desire: strategies of human mating. New York: BasicBooks. Caplan, J. (2009). Adultery 2.0. Time, 174(2), 59. Retrieved from EBSCOhost. Accessed 1st October 2011 Wysocki, D., & Childers, C. (2011). 'Let My Fingers Do the Talking': Sexting and Infidelity in Cyberspace. Sexuality & Culture, 15(3), 217-239. doi:10.1007/s12119-011-9091-4 Gonyea, J. (2004). Internet Sexuality: Clinical Implications for Couples. American Journal of Family Therapy, 32(5), 375-390. doi:10.1080/01926180490499341 Hertlein, K. M., & Piercy, F. P. (2006). Internet Infidelity: A Critical Review of the Literature. Family Journal, 14(4), 366-371. doi:10.1177/1066480706290508 Harvey, J. H. (2006). Handbook of divorce and relationship dissolution. Barmingham: Routledge. Marshall, A. G. (2011). How Can I Ever Trust You Again? New York: Bloomsbury Publishing. McKenry, P. C. (2009). Families & change: coping with stressful events and transitions. New York: SAGE. Riedmann, A. (2011). Marriages, Families, and Relationships: Making Choices in a Diverse Society. Chicago: Cengage Learning. Read More