A Love Story Analysis - Essay Example

Love story When we met We met each other at a in China in 2008 as of 2+2 cooperation projects. We spent four years together – the first two years as students in China and the other two years studying at University of Adelaide. However, during this period we were just classmates with not much of interaction. Interactions at another level It was only sometime in mid-June (2011) that things changed. I was under stress trying to cope with the course at Adelaide when my friends suggested that I should get Cheng (my classmate even in China) to assist us. In fact, they suggested that he too was keen to help me cope with the subject. I did approach him and honestly, that was the first time that spoke to him and actually lokked at him directly. I realized that he was a calm and composed person, patient and gentle. Physically too, he was impressive with a tall build and a pleasing disposition. How the relationship commenced Interactions increased during the exam revision period as we got to know each other. With each meeting, I started admiring him more and more. He also had a good sense of humor while his smile made me go crazy. I felt drawn towards him as days passed. I also got the vibes that he too was keen to meet me. The next three months were spent in intense exchange of messages. I used to look forward to parties thrown by my friends because that would mean meeting Cheng. It was like as if I wanted there should a party every other day, so attracted I was towards him. About three months later, I decided to express my feelings to him and start a relationship. However, I also prepared myself for rejection from his side – I did not want to break down or shatter my life. So I told myself that even if he does not same feelings for me, we could continue to be good friends. This is because I liked him immensely as an individual and valued his friendship. I did not trust myself so I jotted down all that I wanted to express and then called him up. I picked up the courage to call him up and “read” out my feelings, all the while nervous as a wreck. His silence further unnerved me. He then calmly conveyed that he was not ready for any steady relationship yet. As if I was prepared for this, I said I did understand and that he need not feel stressed; we could continue to be friends as before. A couple of days later we did meet again when we all went to the Adelaide show. While I was trying to be as natural as if nothing had happened, I could sense that he was trying to avoid eye contact with me. At times, he joked as if to cover up his emotions. However, I still thought perhaps he just wanted to be nice with me and behave as if nothing had happened. A couple of days later, precisely on the 12th September 2011, during the mid-Autumn festival, at a common friends’ party, he did express his feelings towards me. However, he had consumed a large amount of beer and when he called me up at mid-night to convey his feelings, my initial response was, “I need time to think about it”. This is because I was not sure if this was simply an effect of the alcohol and as soon as the effect subsides, so would his feelings. I did not want to get carried away only to feel hurt later. Besides, I wanted to give him to reconsider his feelings once he was sober, and not take decisions in an intoxicated state. Secretly I was overwhelmed and then could not control myself. So I ended messaging him on the 16th September 2011 that I was missing him. That was the point when I relationship commenced. Why you decided to commence the relationship As I state above, Cheng gave me a gentle and polite impression in the first place. Since then, I started I started following him on Facebook, his Weibo and other community media to know what he experienced and what he was engaged in. I found he loves dogs as I could see several pictures of him hugging dogs. His smile makes my heart skip a beat. I feel Cheng is a kind and warm guy. He is a focused person and has planned his career as well. He has a pleasing personality and an amicable disposition; he is popular with friends and a loving family member aswell. Once, when I was invited to his house, I saw some family pictures in his room. He introduced the family members and the stories for each picture. I realised he is really filial and grateful. These are things about him that really impressed me. I also came to know of his pat relationship with a girl, although they have broken up. Through the social media I could sense that he continued to have the passionate feelings for the girl even after two years. This did not make me nerovous; on the other hand it enhanced my feelings because it showed what a committed person he is. I wanted to be the warmth in his life who could help him overcome the past and share the future with him. These all put together urged me to start a relationship with him. • Significant events during your relationship 1. First gift Certain moments become so deeply etched in your memory. For instance, it was the 16th October 2011; the day Cheng gave me the first gift. A gift, for Cheng, is the start of a healthy and long relationship. I was overwhelmed. Once we commenced relationship, Cheng took up part-time job to earn money. He washed dishes in a restaurant on Fridays and Saturdays. So caring was he that he would call me up immediately after work and share with me all that had happened. The biggest surprise was when he bought me a Swarovski necklace as the first month anniversary gift. I told him to save money as we were just students but it was touching to hear that he had taken up part-time job only to gift me something to express his sincerity of the relationship.. This was his way of conveying that he wanted me to be a part of his life. Besides, he did not want to take money from his parents apart from the tuition fees; he wanted to maintain independence. I was overwhelmed to see him manage his life with discretion and that he did not want to add to his parents’ financial burden. 2. Went back to China In November 2011, both of us went to China to visit our families. Since were just two months into the relationship, we decided not to disclose it to our parents. Cheng and I are from different provinces. I live in Beijing, Cheng lives in Liaoning. He has an older cousin settled in Beijing. Cheng and his parents came to Beijing to visit his cousin. I knew where they lived and hence on 3rd December I bought some traditional Beijing snacks. I remembered Cheng mentioning once that his father was a diabetic, so I bought some unsweetened Beijing snacks. I called up Cheng before leaving and asked if he could come out to meet me. He did manage to come out saying that he had a friend in Beijing to meet. I was so happy to see him; I handed over the snacks I had brought for his father. However, I did not tell him what it was and nor did Cheng ask me about it. He simply went and gave it to his parents who were surprised that his “Beijing friend” knew his father is a diabetic and bought unsweetened foods. Cheng then revealed to them about me and this is how his parents came to know about our relationship. It seems they had a very good impression me at the first instance. I. 3. The First Few Months As days passed by, I realized that things were not as good as I expected. In the beginning the relationship should be passionate, but it was not. After the vacation in China, when we returned for class at the University, things appeared to be different. He shared room with a friend called Xioa, who had bought a car recently. After class I would wait for him thinking we would spend time together, chatting or simply going around but he had excuses like Xiao is going home and taking his car with him. Such excuses saddened me but I did not reveal my feelings in front of him. I came back to my room and wept. I was wondering why he was behaving like this but did not find an answer. However, I got the answer in the month of May 2012. Cheng had consumed beer at a friend’s party and after that when both of us were going to sleep, suddenly Cheng started crying. When I asked him the reason he said he felt sad for me. He was feeling bad that he had been keeping me at a distance and asked me to forgive him. I used to think perhaps he is a late adopter and would take time to come out of the previous relationship. However, I then realized that he loved me much more than I had thought. 4. went to Sydney Cheng really know of my feelings and was concerned for me. Both of us were like the famous Chinese comedian Guodegang. I am a big fan of Guo. His comedy shows have helped me get over difficult times; he makes me laugh and be happy, so I have a special affection for him. Guo held a comedy show on 28th September 2012 in Sydney. I wanted to buy tickets for that show; Cheng supported my idea and suggested that we can buy the VIP tickets because he knew I really like Guo. On that day, we arrived at the Town Hall and thoroughly enjoyed the show. After the show some of us sat close to Guo; we went up to the stage and shook hands with him. I was so excited at actually seeing and touching my idol that I started weeping. This is the effect that Gua has on me; Cheng recognized my feelings for Guo. He hugged me close, stroked my head and comforted me. These are the moments you love, knowing that your partner understands your emotions. 5. Lend my money for tuitions In March 2013, I started my first semester of final year for the bachelor’s degree. However, I chose a wrong elective subject. I chose urban planning subject, which I was interested in when I saw the course outline. However, when I listened to the lectures and attended the tutorials, I realised that subject was really hard for me. Then I knew the other students were doing like architecture or other related majors except me. I was doing commerce which means I don’t have any knowledge of urban planning. In addition, I failed in the first assignment, which further upset me and demoralized me. I discussed with Cheng that I wanted to drop the subject and he respected my decision. However, I did not get the money back as it was after Census date. I did not tell my parents about this as this would mean asking them for extra money for the new subject that I would have to take up. In the last semester, Cheng lent me $3,500 for my “extra” tuition fee. In order to avoid my parents getting angry, he lent me this money; I was moved and appreciated this gesture and his faith in me. 6. Ceremony for Cheng In February 2013, Cheng went to Sydney for his Master’s degree. However, he needed to come back to Adelaide for his bachelor’s degree on the 19th of April. That morning Cheng had a tutorial and the ceremony was at 2PM. He had to take a flight to Adelaide once he finished his tutorial. I arrived in Sydney a couple days before him and helped pack his luggage. We literally had to rush to catch the flight to be on time for the ceremony; we did manage to do so. I was glad to be with him on this day to attend his ceremony. Since his parents were unable to attend this ceremony, I took care of taking photos for him. As students we are always in a mad rush and we did not get time to prepare any formal dress for the occasion. However, Cheng said he was lucky because he can attend this ceremony which was really valuable. I was happy at his discretion where he valued the ceremony itself and not the frills like formal attire. I really admire his attitude and want to learn from hm. 7. We live together At the end of 2013, Cheng finished his Master’s degree in Sydney. He came back to Adelaide and we needed to find an apartment to live together. In the past, we lived separately in Adelaide. We did not live together beyond three days a week. But I did not have much worry about cohabitation. I really looked forward to living with Cheng all the time. Although we did not cohabit before, I thought I really knew a lot of him. I accepted his living habits like going to bed without washing the feet if he was tired; staying in bed from 9am to 12pm to browse smart devices and so on. In February, we moved to an apartment where we live even today. Everything is good and we don’t have many problems in life. At the same time, I feel the more I know him, the more I want to share my thoughts and my life with him. 8. Cheng’s first time to see my parents My parents came to Adelaide sometime in mid-April 2014 for my bachelor graduation ceremony. In order to pick up my parents from the airport and visit other places in Adelaide, Cheng rented a car in advance. That was the first time they met each other. He wanted to give my parents a good impression. Cheng was nervous when we were waiting at the airport but I told him that he would be fine because we have been together more than two years. Besides, I really think he is a good person; I think my parents would like him as well. As I expected, when we reached the hotel, my parents told me they had a good impression of Cheng. I deeply knew it was just a good beginning, my parents would like him more in the following days because of the qualities he has, which makes him a popular person even with friends. Next day Cheng drove us to the Barossa village East Winery to taste wine and enjoy the scenery. Cheng tried to introduce the history of Adelaide, Barossa and the brands of wineries we would visit. My dad was curious about everything and had plenty of questions, which made me stressful. However, Cheng was really patiently and politely answered every question. Moreover, he took pictures and introduced classic wine of each brand to my parents. I really knew he had prepared for a while for this trip, on which wineries to visit and which brands to consume. I was really touched by what he did. Next, on the 19th April after my ceremony, my parents wanted to take a graduation photo at uni directly. We can take about eight pictures in a photo package. I really appreciated that my parents included two pictures of Cheng and me together in the package. This indicated that my parents really recognised our relationship. 9. My first time to see Cheng’s parents At the beginning of June 2014, Cheng’s parents came to Australia to attend Cheng’s Master’s degree which would be held on the 19th June. I had spoken to his parents over phone and through the computers but this was the first time we were meeting face-to-face. I was definitely nervous. Cheng comforted me that his parents already know me and had a good impression of me. I thought that Cheng told me his parents were really bright and reasonable. From the past conversations with them, I really felt that his parents were humorous as well. The fact was true, his parents greeted me passionately. I was really happy. When we got home, Cheng’s mother gave me a silver bracelet. I was touched because I did not expect that I would receive this expensive gift. At that moment, I was in the midst of final examination revision. I went to uni for reviewing and could not join them for dinner, which his parents understood. However, when I had some free time Cheng and I took them to some places of interest. We attended Cheng’s Master’s ceremony together in middle of June. I remembered that Cheng’s father was not satisfied with Cheng’s shirt for the ceremony. He said Cheng should learn how to match clothes. This did not really matter to me because this is not what Cheng is; I like Cheng as he is. 10. Went back to China met families It was the perfect time for us to go back China to see our relatives. In the middle of July, we packed and took the flight back to China. It was just 19 days for us to stay in that period. We were really busy. Because Cheng and I are from different provinces, we needed to go to each other’s hometown to see our relatives. I remember when I went to a family dinner with Cheng’s relatives, they were very kind and enthusiastic. During the dinner, Cheng’s uncle asked me whether I did not the food as I ate very little. I said I don’t eat much and the food was very delicious; in fact I expressed that I enjoyed spending time with them. I was in fact honoured to have dinner with his family, the food in itself is not important. Cheng’s family’s financial situation is not what matters; what Cheng is as a person is what matters. I know Cheng is a hardworking guy; he knows his plan and works for it intensely. This is one of the qualities of Cheng which I really admire. Then, Cheng and his parents came to Beijing to see my parents. This was the first time that both set of parents met. Both sides expressed satisfaction and asked us to consider marriage soon. I was really happy with that and cried; was overwhelmed to get blessings and understanding from both parents. When I looked at Cheng, he too had tears welling up in his eyes. I cried even more because I could exactly understand his feelings. And I know both of us really love each other and really appreciate parents’ blessings on us. Now We are now more than four years into the relationship; how time flies. I think we are like any other normal couple. Light life is also a kind of happiness. At this moment, he is an accountant in a small tyre company and does part time job at a restaurant where he has been working for almost four years. Work is hard and tiring for him. . I know he wants to give us a better living standard. But I do not like to add to his stress. I always cook dinner and clean the house after my part time job. I want him to return home to deliciously cooked food and a comfortable home, and share the rest of the time with the girl who is madly in love with him. This is what a home is. I loving cooking for him, making him comfortable, doing laundry, covering the quilt for him at night, all of which make me feel home is sweet. Future There are 3 things we have been planning. The first is, we want to get married in the next year, which we really admire. Second, both of us want to get a stable job for a better standard of living. Cheng has been doing accounting in Tyres Company which is really good for him, hope he does better in his position. For me, I’m going to learn something I am interested in, like makeup and bakery and look forward taking up related job. Lastly, we want to have a baby after two years. I really want a girl which would be sweet; however, Cheng wants a boy because he can play soccer with his son in the future. Anyway, step by step, hold each other’s hand is what we want to achieve our common goal. I hope our future will be bright. Read More