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“Loosing someone we love is more threatening than the possibility of loosing our own lives” If there should be a reason to fear death, these would be the grounds of many. What makes the idea of death of a loved one appalling is its process of letting go. Many undergo physical, mental and emotional torture, which can lead to depression and in most cases, suicidal attempts. In the case of a bereaved child towards the death of the child’s parents, the loss is more critical since parents play a vital role in molding a child, thus, the more significant the loss, the more intense the grief.
Indeed, the pain of a bereaved would not heal overnight. It takes a lot of time and courage; some may take months while others wait for years to cope up with their loss. But what is important is to try to look at life on a different perspective, and that means moving on. According to experts, the best way to cope up with grief is to connect with other people; knowing that there are people who understand and care for you may lessen the pain. Oftentimes, when the pain is taking time to heal, it is advisable to go to a therapist; they can help a bereaved surpass intense emotions.
In the case of therapists, the challenge is not to “treat” patients but allow them to let loose of their burdens. For children who lost their parents, the goal is to inculcate in them that moving on does not mean detaching and forgetting rather accepting and starting a new life and commitment in two different worlds. It is also referred by Carol Crandall in her book, In a Time to Grieve: Mediations for Healing after the Death of a Loved One (1994) as "You don't heal from the loss of a loved one because time passes; you heal because of what you do with the time".
There are a number of approaches a therapist may use such as communication with the deceased through writing and conversation as well as participating in support groups that will allow the bereaved to share their sorrow with others who have experienced similar losses. Whatever the approach might be, what is important is to be one with the patient, do not just sympathize rather empathize with them.
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