A Slight Bias Against the Transgenders - Essay Example

s School It is in the darkest hours that the eyes begin to see – Anonymous The quote recited above gathers all the superfluous chunk of feelings that I went through during the process of researching about the lives of the transgenders residing in the United States. The poem isn’t merely an exaggeration of the emotional exuberance rather it`s an understated portrayal of a life of a transgender which is illustrated in the piece. When I decided to role play as transgender by taking up entirely feminine attire, I knew it would be challenging however it turned out be overwhelming. The research took me to places I haven’t even imagined, and opened a whole new sphere of unexplored miseries of life I wasn’t even aware of. Writing this poem proved to be an enlightening and a life changing experience for me, and as I progressed through the development of the poem new doors kept opening for me giving a new perspective to my life each time I entered another phase of the poem. The poem is thus more than just expressive art for me, rather it`s a smaller part of a bigger evolution that I had gone through ever since. “Now when I look back”, was the perfect beginning for my poem as I`ve associated a versatile range of feelings and emotions with the bitter experiences, which compel me on looking back towards the hardest time of my life. There are two kinds of encounters that you can never get off your mind, the one which rejoices you to the fullest to the extent that it replenishes your energies and the second which are so hard to take that every second seem to pass like a lifetime. From the stare in people`s eyes to the glare in the children`s sight, everything seemed to rip off a part of my heart. I was the center of attention for every passerby, not in a good way though. There were mixed kinds of expressions that people were exhibiting towards me, which were very hard to explain. I had never in my life experiences the nature of expressive reactions that people were giving which made it even harder to interpret the messages. As I set my steps in the street to start off my day, I was mindful of the fact that I was indeed taking a very bold step which is completely unacceptable to the society. I thought I was ready, though I later realized I wasn’t. When everyone was staring at me, people turning back to have a second look at me and cars literally stopping by with the intent of publically abusing me, I tried to adjust to the changes by explaining myself that this process is necessary to understand the essence of the issue. Taking the reaction positively, I tried to continue the activity shifting the focus on my aim for the research instead of the harsh comments being thrown at me. All my efforts for trying to get comfortable were literally going to waste, as every moment was becoming even more difficult for me. While I was caught up in the adjustment phase, a very strange yet disturbing incident occurred to me. A boy almost my age came up to me and told me how I`m a disgrace to the society and how I should rather kill myself for the betterment of the society. I couldn’t take his comments anymore thus I retaliated though it wasn’t something that I was supposed to do during the course of the activity. I cross questioned the boy asking him how my identity was a disgrace to anyone, and how my individuality can be affecting anyone else. His answer was as disturbing as the harshest cut in my heart that only the sharpest knife could leave. He quoted some verse from a theological narration and told me how I had committed a sin in my former life, due to which God had punished me for my sin and I will skink the entire society with the disgust that I carry. I said nothing but walked away silently, and it was the first time in my life that I couldn’t stop my tears. The strength in me was fading away. This experience took my thoughts to many other perspectives of life. I`ve always understood the significance that one`s identity carries but I`ve never thought about those who are going through an identity crises. Everyone seeks satisfaction upon acceptance within a particular group which can relate to the feeling of the individual, and in that case opposition from other communities isn’t that hard either. However, for someone who doesn’t have any group to fit in or any community to relate to is left with no option but to feel ousted. For a moment, I almost accepted what the boy just told me, the explanation started making sense as what other reason could be behind the creation of a transgender, as that`s not what one chooses in fact it`s an internal urge which comes to you naturally. However, I had to knock some sense inside me and drag me to act like a rational and a sensible individual again. Nevertheless, even that didn’t make life easier for me. The next part of the poem is the reflection of another realization which struck me. Aimlessly trying to find for the solution of the problem, in an effort to advocate for the individuals whose lives are badly being influenced by the societal pressures I tried to find outlets. Psychological treatment owes to the loved ones, as an individual surrounded by loved ones feels confident on his identity however in case of transgenders even the closest of the people disown them on the basis of their identity. Their friends, even their families force them to give up on their identity, as they perceive it to be rather a temporary affect of a fad or a trend. It is very difficult to make the other realize that most of the time it is not a conscious decision that is controllable rather it`s a psychological compulsion and the instincts just follow. The last part of the poem is the depiction of the solution towards the problem. These people are desperate for love and affection, even acceptance. Thus, when such an individual will acquire affection and gratification form someone, who won`t keep changing the identity as pre-requisites for their love, this will add strength to their personality. With a loved one by your side, you get the durability to take the harshest words and most bizarre reactions of the world. The world won`t change for an individual, however a person might and that`s what will prove to be the greatest inspiration for someone going through an identity crises. Having experienced the life of a transgender, my perspective also saw a drastic change. Earlier I had a slight bias against the transgenders though I had no issues with them on a personal level. However, the level of respect for their community has now been intensified to a great level. This community deals with all kinds of abusive and insulting behaviors in all kinds of settings but they still remain loyal to their identities. They have to go through phases of depression and self critical stages; however they still survive and fight back. This experience indented a strong feeling inside me i.e. if I`m not one of them doesn’t mean that they`re on the offensive, rather the society is wrong as they leave on the defensive without even giving them a chance to explain themselves. One thing I`ve learned which will stay will me all my life is that one should judge themselves before passing judgments about others as everyone has a story we`re unaware of. Read More