Knowledge of the Main Changes that Go With the Divorce - Research Paper Example

Running Head: Effects of Divorce on Children Effects of Divorce on Children The effect of divorce on children is most often accredited to the fact that there is a change in structure from a two-parent to a one-parent family. Going away of one parent is certainly a salient aspect of divorce and is an apparent starting point for the search for effects of divorce on children. Since in over ninety percent of the cases, the father leaves and the mother remains, it is this condition that will be considered. Much of the research has stressed that it is the loss or the absence of the father which is openly damaging to the child's healthy social and cognitive development. More lately, research on divorce has approached the issue of the absent father from a diverse perspective, stressing the reorganization process that is an expected result of the family's structural change. In this framework, the departure of the father is seen as just one of a number of events to which the child should adjust. Throughout the separation and divorce process and ongoing for at least a year after divorce, single mothers are often worried with their own depression, anger, or emotional needs and are incapable to respond perceptively to their children. Such dysfunctions in maternal regulation result in a lowered tolerance of the child's behavior, which openly impacts maternal perceptions of her child's adjustment. Ross (1972) argued that parental discernments are a product of both the child's behavior and the parent's acceptance level. It appears credible that depression influences individual differences between parents in their acceptance for a variety of child behaviors. Clinical symptoms that co-vary with depression, such as distractibility and restlessness, may increase the possibility that single mothers will selectively attend to moderately low frequency inapt behavior, forming impressions of her children's alteration that are not acceptable by objective counts of behavior. Alternately, parental depression and distress may raise attention to moderately high frequency rebellious behaviors that were not interpreted as worrisome prior to the inception of personal distress. On a behavioral level, changes in perceptions might result in the inconsistent use of ineffective child-management strategies and dictatorial control (e.g., betacommands) at a time when parents seek to bound interactions with their children. The net consequence of such dynamics might be the expansion of what Patterson (1982) has termed coercive styles of family interactions. One of the issues linking to emotional pattern of this kind of family breakdown is that of the divorce process, which shows the way to families living in single-parent households and eventually to remarriage of one, if not both, parents and the formation of stepfamilies. This process, now believed likely to occur to one marriage in every three, also consequences in one in five children experiencing the divorce of their parents and the succeeding remarriage of at least one of them (conceivably more than once) during childhood. The following emergence of binuclear families, it will be argued, could properly be described as rehabilitated extended families. These post-nuclear families, whose members are not all biologically linked to one another, and which form more or less a third of families in the United Kingdom, now take their place in society alongside the more conventional nuclear families. The reasons for the rise in divorce are numerous. When legal aid permitted reasonable divorces and divorce laws were basic, desertion was no longer as necessary. Subsequent to World War II, Americans had a greater sense of impermanence. The security that marriage presented was no longer as attractive. Religion, a unified force in numerous families, began playing a less significant part in American life as attendance at services declined between 1958 and 1980 by almost twenty percent. The number of people who allied with any religion also declined throughout that time period. Women's economic situations improved so much that numerous no longer felt they had to remain in an unhappy marriage for their own survival. The easiness with which one could travel and experience new cities and countries, the dawn of the birth control pill, which really amplified sexual experimentation outside of marriage, increasing expectations for personal happiness, and a stimulating women's movement all given (Hetherington, E. M. 2003). Conceivably fueling the divorce fervor further were several of the high-profile divorces and keeping trials that attracted media attention, as unpleasant as these cases often were. Famed divorce cases sparked interest in divorce as well as custody and made somewhat that was absurd to previous generations possible and likely. In the thirties it was the separate custody trials of Gloria Vanderbilt and Catherine Astor's children. In the 1970s, Cary Grant and Dyan Cannon fought over their daughter. Ten years later it was Roxanne Pulitzer fighting for her children and then the battle for Hilary Morgan between Drs. Eric Foretich and Elizabeth Morgan. Over the last one fifty years, the ambiguous as well as the famous have dropped out of contact with their children after a breakup. It is not just the associate on the corner and the woman who works down the block who are not visiting their children. For example, the wife of Charles Dickens apparently lived apart from her children for many years while he raised them. Alfred Steiglitz, one of the greatest American photographers of the early twentieth century, did not see his daughter, Kitty, for years following his divorce from her mother and his marriage to Georgia O'Keeffe. John Lennon suffered severely from the breakup of his parents' relationship and his lack of contact with his father. Yoko Ono's daughter, Kyoko, was kidnapped by her father; and mother and child went for years without seeing each other. Actress Jodie Foster has seen her father only a few times since her parents divorced over thirty years ago (Amato, P. and D. DeBoer. 2001). The number of couples who seek a divorce to end their marriage has steadily been increasing since 1971, following the implementation of the 1969 Divorce Reform Act. Until that time, the divorce rate, though steadily increasing, rose to a sudden peak after the war. The number of divorces rose sharply from 51,594 during the years 1941-45 to 199,507 between 1946 and 1950. As well as the substantial increase in the number of divorces (in 1995 these rose to 175,000, a rise of 24,000 on 19984, though by 1997 the numbers had dropped again to 165,000), men and women are getting divorced at a younger age. However, the particularly sharp rise in the number of divorces in 1995 is at least partially accounted for by the Matrimonial and Family Proceedings Act (1994), which permitted divorce after one year of marriage. Nevertheless, according to the briefing paper prepared by the Family Policy Studies Centre (1993), the rates of divorce are highest after three years of marriage and between the ages of 25 and 29, when nearly one in thirty couples divorces. Divorce rates among couples who have been married seven years have fallen to about two-thirds and one-half respectively, and they continue to decline the longer the duration of the marriage. The length of marriage is also becoming shorter; in 1989 the median duration for couples with children under 16 was 11.2 years, this showing a slow decline until 1992, when it was 11 years. In 1995 there was a sharp decrease to 8.4 years, but by 1997 the median length of marriage was 9.3 years. As the paper subsequently comments, In any year the total number of couples divorcing will be affected by three factors: (i) The number of couples 'at risk'. (ii) The numbers in particular age groups. (iii) The numbers of those in particular high risk groups. It is therefore important to consider the divorce rates rather than simply the numbers of divorces, which can give a misleading impression on underlying trends (Ahrons, C. R. and J. L. Tanner. 2003). There appears to be an esteemed notion that protracted absence of a father from a household does irreversible psychological harm to the growing child. Divorce is but one of a number of events that impetuous the state of affairs known as father absence. Studies of the effects of father absence on samples of children of separation or divorce have pierced some of the following claims: father-absent boys show inappropriate sex-role behaviors, have a less sufficient sex-role identification, and have a lower level of moral development; father-absent girls behave incongruously in their heterosexual relationships; and both boys and girls from father-absent homes have lower academic performance. generally, the father-absence position assumes that fathers have a direct consequence on the psychological well-being of their children mainly their sons. In a comprehensive review of research on father absence, Herzog and Sudia (1973) point out two ways in which it is implicit that fathers directly affect their children. First, fathers are believed to serve as sex role models for their sons. Social learning theory states that identification with a male sex-role model is essential for the male child's development of a healthy masculine self-image and suitable sex-typed behaviors. It is conjectured that the absence of the father consequences either in increased "feminized" behavior, or in excessively aggressive behavior, a type of reaction formation or overcompensation for the lack of a male model. In their complete review of father-absence studies, Herzog and Sudia (1973) find little support for this assumption. Not simply are the findings contradictory as to the extent of impaired sex-role development in father-absent children, but it is not even clear what significance to attach to significant differences. What does it mean, for instance, that father-absent boys are more probable to choose "feminine" toys or games to play with than father-present boys Secondly, a father's absence is measured damaging to the child's development because of the lack of paternal supervision and discipline (Herzog and Sudia, 1973). This lack of supervision is linked with the child's increased aggressive behavior and reduced urge control. Parental supervision is known to be connected to a child's social adjustment, but it need not be granted by the father. There is evidence to propose that firm control and supervision by any unswerving adult by a mother or even a grandmother is enough to keep a boy out of trouble (Herzog and Sudia, 1973). Some children alleged the whole world to be filled with symbols of loss. Julie was tense and reluctant to talk, remembering at first only that she told her parents "over and over," long before the divorce, "You'd better not get a divorce." Her near despair was poignantly conveyed by her inability to think of three wishes, stating instead she didn't have any favorite things "in school, at home, or anything." Julie's mother had told her divorce was better because she would have two places to live and visit. Julie, doubtful, said, "I'll wait and see." In the second interview, she wondered sadly why children usually live with their mothers, expressing again the wish to live with both parents. After a tired sigh, Julie talked worriedly of a dog's heart attack, then the therapist's doll: "Poor little thing, she doesn't have any eyes." In the last interview, Julie volunteered that she had finally thought of her three wishes: "First that my daddy would come home. Second that my parents would get back together. And third, that they would never, ever divorce again." Sadly she said, "It will never happen, I won't get any of my wishes." Catherine, seven years old when her parents separated, sadly described her vision of divorce as, "It's when people go away." Some children kept their feelings in careful check and fell back on complicated coping maneuvers which enabled them to maintain their surface composure. Sam, age eight, stoutly maintained he didn't have too many problems about the divorce, and he was glad it was over. When asked to draw his family, Sam instead spent the entire hour on a compulsively elaborated drawing of his many-roomed house that had a place for everyone, and he talked lovingly of each added architectural detail. Sam anxiously asked if he should put everyone in his family in the drawing, including his kitten, now dead of leukemia. Eventually, he declined to draw any people. Only at the end of the last session did this child admit to a "tiny problem" of wanting to see his dad more. Several months later, Sam requested an interview "to talk of the awful bad problems I'm having at night." If it is the direct effect of a father's absence that is the overriding cause of children's reactions to divorce, then one would expect it to exert a similarly strong effect in the case of a father's death, desertion, or prolonged absence. While there are many similarities among all children who have lost a father, there are also some striking differences-especially between children who have experienced a father's death and those whose parents have divorced. In a study of the impact of father or mother absence on lower and middle-class white adolescent girls, Hetherington (1972) found that daughters of divorce did considerably more sexual acting-out than did either daughters of widows or girls from integral families. The daughters of widows were shy, withdrawn, and extremely nervous throughout their interviews with a male interviewer; they also reported the least amount of heterosexual activity of any of the adolescent girls. Zill's survey (1978) found that parents' and teachers' ratings of destructive behavior were much higher for children whose parents were separated or divorced than for those whose mothers were widowed or never married. Despite the structural change, the functions facing the family remain the same: income is desirable for subsistence, emotional and physical care should be provided to the children, and the household should be kept in a suitable state of order and repair. Following divorce, the significant change is in who does what and how the tasks are accomplished. For instance, the single-parent family may rely on welfare payments so as to obtain income previously provided by the father, or the mother might take a full-time job, giving up her role as child-caretaker to a day care center. Children are as well estimated to become more accountable and contribute more in routines of household and personal care. Viewing divorce as a reorganization procedure from a two-parent to a single-parent family unit suggests numerous factors that might affect children's adjustment. In the first place, one adult trying to execute the same functions previously done by two adults will inexorably lead to some shortchanging somewhere along the line. For instance, the single mother has only an inadequate amount of emotional energy and time available for her children, particularly if her responsibilities require being the sole provider and caretaker. Second, change often lead to stress (Brown, Bhrolchin, and Harris, 1975) and as the changes insisted of the new single-parent family mount, so do the stresses, and with them an augmented susceptibility to psychiatric problems. One of the most common stresses experienced by single-parent mothers is lack of money. Bane points out that not simply is divorce more probable to occur in families with lower incomes, but also that divorce itself can cause reduced income, though only for the single-parent mother. Financial support from the departed father is imminent less than half the time, and even if allowance payments are made, the majority of the recipients still must work full- or part-time to make ends meet. The damage of living under economic hardship, as the majority of single, female headed families do (Bane), might take a psychological toll on mothers and children alike. Several of the stresses that convoy divorce may more openly affect the child. For instance, following the divorce, the single-parent family might move: the child leaves old friends, enters a new school, and has to make new friends. If the mother takes a full-time job, the child's entire daily routine may have to change. If the mother remarries, the child must adjust to a new adult male in the house. Although there is a good deal of research on life events, stress, and the emotional health of adults, little is recognized about what effect life-event changes have on children's adjustment. Departure of the father or mother is perhaps only one of the many changes that the child of divorce encounters. If it is factual of children, as it is for adults, that an increase in life-event changes produces greater risk for psychiatric problems, then knowledge of the main changes that go with the divorce would facilitate us to make a more precise prediction of its impact on children. Therefore, for divorcing couples with children, stress and problems are compounded. Parents with custody must contend with distressed, bewildered children who are likely to respond to their families' ruptures with at least transient emotional or behavioral problems. Parents without custody must find a way to cope with being shut out of their children's day-to-day lives and to avoid the real possibility of being relegated from a parent to a tangential player in their children's futures. References: Ahrons, C. R. and J. L. Tanner. (2003). Adult children and their fathers: Relationship changes 20 years after parental divorce. Family Relations 52:340-351. Amato, P. and D. DeBoer. (2001) The transmission of marital stability across generations: Relationship skills or commitment to marriage Journal of Marriage and Family, 63, 1038-1051. Hetherington, E. M. (2003) Intimate pathways: Changing patterns in close personal relationships across time. Family Relations, 52, 318-331. Ross, A. O. (1972). Behavioral therapy. In. B. B. Wolman (Ed.), Manual of child psychopathology (pp. 158-201). New York: McGraw-Hill. Patterson, G. R. (1982). Coercive family process: A social learning approach (Vol. 3). Eugene, OR: Castalia. Herzog, E., and Sudia, C. E. 1973. Children in fatherless families. In B. M. Caldwell and H. N. Ricciuti (Eds.), Child development and social policy. Chicago: University of Chicago Press. Hetherington, E. M. 1972. Effects of paternal absence on personality development in adolescent daughters. Developmental Psychology, 7, 313-326. Zill, N. 1978. Divorce, marital happiness and the mental health of children: Findings from the Foundation for Child Development National Survey of Children. Paper prepared for National Institute of Mental Health workshop on Divorce and Children. Bethesda, Md. Brown, G. W., Bhrolchin, M. N., and Harris, T. 1975. Social class and psychiatric disturbance among women in an urban population. Sociology, 9, 225-254. Bane, M. J. 1974. Who cares about child care Working Papers, 2, 33-40. Read More