Interpersonal Communication and Its Characteristics - Assignment Example

Topic: Interpersonal Communication Dear John and Stacey, my advice for successful relationship is to have transparent and focused interpersonal communication with each other. The communication which takes place between two persons who are closely connected with each other is known as interpersonal communication. When concentrating on interpersonal communication, one needs to focus on the four main principles related to this subject. Principles of Interpersonal Communication a) Interpersonal communication is inescapable: We cannot stop communicating. The very act of not communicating itself conveys some message to the other partner. It is not only words, but the facial expression, gesture and body language have the potentiality to convey some message to the other party. b) Interpersonal communication is irreversible: It is impossible to reverse what you have said once. So once you have communicated something to your partner then it is not possible to avert its affects. c) Interpersonal communication is complicated: Every kind of communication is complex due to the existence of various variables in it. According to King (2000), “theorists note that whenever we communicate there are really at least six "people" involved: 1) who you think you are; 2) who you think the other person is; 30 who you think the other person thinks you are; 4) who the other person thinks /she is; 5) who the other person thinks you are; and 6) who the other person thinks you think s/he is”. d) Interpersonal communication is contextual: It is not possible for an interpersonal communication to occur on an isolated platform. There are different context on which interpersonal communication occurs. These are relational, psychological, situational and cultural context. It would also be necessary for you to understand that apart from principles there are certain misconceptions about interpersonal communication which will help you in having a better understanding of the whole phenomenon. Misconception about interpersonal communication a) Interpersonal communication can solve all issues: It is highly essential for me to explain that simply by acquiring the technique of interpersonal communication one cannot work out all the problems related to a relationship. b) Interpersonal communication is always a positive thing: You should know that the concept of interpersonal relationship has been made as a magical process to solve relationship issue by social media and network. However in real sense, interpersonal communication is not a very joyful process in a relationship. c) Interpersonal communication is common sense I would like to tell you that as believed, interpersonal communication is not a concept which is based on commonsense. If it has been so, then we would not have had so many problems related with it. Apart from common sense, interpersonal communication needs an extensive use of skill and tactics. This could be explained by telling that the females and males look at any relationship issue from a different perspective. So the common sense of both is different and looking at a problem from various angles can create more problems. You both also need to understand that in order to practice a good interpersonal communication, one need to understand the barriers related to it. For your better understanding, I can put these barriers in a systematic order. Barriers to interpersonal communication a) Language barrier: Frankly speaking, unclear language and linguistic skill can pose as a major barrier to interpersonal communication. Even if you both use same language for communicating, the different terminology used by both of you can stand as a barrier in your interpersonal interaction. This means if one of the partner uses jargons which are unfamiliar to the other then there can arise misinterpretation in communication process. b) Psychological barriers: You both might be surprised to know that the receiving ability of a listener has lot to do with interpersonal communication. This is because if John is a listener and experiences stress and depression, then his receptive skill can be weak and inadequate. This can lead to misunderstanding and confusion and causing chaos in relationship. c) Physiological barrier: This can happen when there is defect at the end of receiver in any manner. For example, if Stacey has an impaired hearing, then she might not be able to grasp things as quickly as John, hence there can arise misunderstanding and misconception in the communication process. d) Physical barriers: It is also important for you to know that physical barrier can create lot of hindrance in your day to day communication process. This can happen when the couple is living far away geographically and less communication medium is available to both on technological basis. e) Systematic barrier: You should also understand that systematic barrier has a role to play in damaging the interpersonal communication between couples. This happens when you both fail to understand your respective duties and responsibilities regarding your relationship. f)Attitudinal barrier: Attitude barrier is one aspect which creates problems in interpersonal interactions. Here the ego, behavior and perspective of one partner or both partners can lead to chaos in a relationship. Attitude barrier can create conflicts, desperation, frustration and despair among two people in a relationship. In addition to principles and barriers there is a lot more to the interpersonal communication. You both should understand that in a relationship there are lots of factors that can create hindrances in interacting with each other. So, you both as a couple should study different strategies needed to carry out interpersonal communication. As such, you both also might be aware of the importance of listening in a relationship. I would like to explain it to you that there are certain types of listening and there is also certain type of strategy to deal with it. They can be understood as follows. Types of listening and their strategy Active listening: By active listening I mean that one should be positively involved in the practice of listening when the other partner is speaking. There are certain strategies to be applied when actively listening to the speaker. One, when listening, should focus on the face of the speaker. As per UCSF (2012), “although no one can gain all of the information by sight alone, everyone has some ability to speech read; that is, to obtain information on what is being said by watching a speakers lips, facial expressions, gestures, body language, etc”. a) Critical listening: Apart from active listening there is another type of listening called critical listening. According to critical listening concept, one should assess, evaluate and judge the message conveyed by the speaker. In your case, you both while listening to each other’s message should understand deeply the real meaning of it. One needs to have a critical awareness to bring out the emotional appeal or propaganda involved in a particular message of the speaker. For example, John might have a specific point of view or purpose when he says that he loves you at a particular event, but you can take this negatively or positively according to your mood or situation. But if you take that message without evaluating it, then chaos can happen in you communication process. b) Empathic listening: There is also another listening method which can avoid assault and disruption in your interpersonal communication process and it is the empathic listening. This a communication process wherein the listener has to give complete attention to the speaker without any judgmental thoughts. The strategy for a successful empathic listening is to let the speaker to speak according to their will, be an alert listener, ask clarification and questions to make more involvement in communication. Now that I have explained to you about different types of listening and the strategies needed to improve the process, I would like to introduce you the concept called “emotional intelligence” and its role in interpersonal communication. Emotional Intelligence and its role in interpersonal communication Here, emotional intelligence can be defined as the ability to assess, evaluate, identify and control his emotions with regard to oneself and others. Sometimes it is argued that a person’s emotional intelligence is based on his inborn characteristics. However, there is also an argument that the emotional intelligence can be sharpened with training and experience. According to Emmerling (2008), “in emotional intelligence, reasoning and thinking operate on emotional information and emotions directly interact with thought to facilitate better decisions, thinking and action”. Emotional intelligence is not concerned with one person but deals with two people or a group. There are basically four steps when considering the issue of emotional intelligence in relation to interpersonal communication. These perceive with emotion, reasoning with emotion, understanding of the emotion, managing the emotion. a) Perceiving with emotion: This is the primary step in emotional intelligence and this indicate that one must concentrate on the body language and facial expression of the speaker while communicating process takes place. b) Reasoning with emotion: This step points out that people when communicating must use emotions to aggravate cognitive and thinking activity. c) Understanding emotions: When we think about understanding emotions, it means that one’s perception of emotion can comprise of different kind of meaning. In most cases, it means to understand the body language, non verbal expression and facial expression of the parties involved in communication. d) Managing emotions: The managing of emotion is a critical part of emotional intelligence. With regard to this concept, it is essential to respond correctly and regulate emotions when indulging in interaction with a person. The emotional intelligence also plays an important role in enhancing the interpersonal communicative skill of people in relationship. In his article, Cox (2011)writes that “emotional intelligence is about knowing what you are feeling, and being able to motivate yourself to get jobs done. It is sensing what others are feeling and handling relationships effectively”. Now that you have got elaborate information to handle the interpersonal communication in a relationship, I would finally like to introduce you to the method of managing interpersonal conflicts. There are also certain strategies to manage interpersonal conflicts. Let us consider them further below. Strategy to erase conflicts in interpersonal relation In any interpersonal relation, it is really difficult to avoid conflicts and arguments. When two or more persons get together, naturally there is a chance for conflicts to occur. As you both are closely connected, it can happen that at some point of time there can arise some arguments or disagreement in your conversation. As per Sorenson (2010), “conflict arises when people disagree about something, which is a part of life. If you experience conflict, it means you probably have some kind of relationship with the other person”. As a matter of fact, conflicts in interpersonal communication should not be seen as a problematic issue as it gives a chance to the people involved in a relationship to overcome their problems. Actually, conflicts in relationship have the potentiality of creating a more satisfying relationship between couples like you both, as you would understand your shortcomings and can work towards lessening it. However, it is really important to know the strategies needed to mend the conflicts arising in interpersonal communications. So here, the strategies explained in relation to conflicts which will help you to avoid destruction of your relationship are listening reflectivel, talking assertively to the partner and compromising .This can be explained briefly for you understanding. a) Listening reflectively: Reflective listening gives space and opportunity for the partners in communication to open up. This helps in fast and affective resolution of the conflict. When you both give importance to listening reflectively, then you get a chance to speak up and give respect to the listener. b) Talking assertively to the partner: When you both communicate with each other you should be talking assertively as this prevents aggression, passive behavior, tension and confusion. Assertive communication shows that you greatly value yours and others wellbeing. c) Compromise: Compromising relates to the sacrificing attempt of the partners with a goal to attain resolution in a fast pace. Compromising reassures the element of love between two partners and enhances the bond between them which will result in fast resolution of the conflict. So as I wrap up the letter, I would like to wish you both good luck with your relationship and utilize the explained interpersonal communication techniques if needed in your future life. References Cox, J. D. (2011, February). Emotional Intelligence and its Role in Collaboration. ASBBS, 18 (1), 435-445. Emmerling, R. J. (2008). Emotional Intelligence: Theoretical and Cultural Perspectives. Hauppauge, NY: Nova Science Publishers. King, D. (2000). Four Principles of Interpersonal Communication. In pstcc.edu. Retrieved November 10, 2012, from http://www.pstcc.edu/facstaff/dking/interpr.htm Sorensen, B. (2010, September 28). Conflict in Interpersonal Relationships. In livestrong.com. Retrieved November 10, 2012, from http://www.livestrong.com/article/245875-conflict-in-interpersonal-relationships UCSF. (2012). Active Listening Strategies. In ucsfhealth.org. Retrieved November 9, 2012, from http://www.ucsfhealth.org/education/active_listening_strategies/index.html Read More