Gender and Sexuality: Marriage Relations and Fatherhood - Term Paper Example

 Gender and Sexuality: Marriage Relations and Fatherhood Introduction While biological or genetic process of developing sexual identity through external markers of sex is a straightforward concept, the debate over gender identity has been varied. Till recently, identity was mainly defined in terms of sexuality, so much so that “becoming a man” “becoming a woman” was taken to be the natural order of the world, and the realization over gender has come only recently (Walsh, 2003). One school of thought considers it in the essentialist biological principle and the other, mainly the postmodern school develops gender identity from a constructivist approach that bases gender on social and power relations. For sociologists like Oakley (), gender is a learned social attribute through which the obvious biological differences in sex are used to justify different social relations and treatment. The concept of patriarchy arises from such theorizing. Parents thus have a socially constructed world view of gender which is transmitted to a child at birth which transmits to adulthood. Gender then influences all relationships and development in human lives. Traditional attitude to gender, too, is defined in terms of strictly defined categories. While men are supposed to be rational, stoic, independent, aggressive and oriented towards success, women are considered to be carers, emotional, nurturing, dependent, selfless and oriented towards relationships (Walsh). Individuals are strictly judged according to these traits and differences between genders are overemphasized. In such gender categozitaion, women’s characteristics in men’s attitude or vice versa are considered in a derogatory manner. Hence, as women are accepted as the normal carers, men’s role in childbirth or parenting is de-emphasized. This paper will first discuss in more detail the concept of identity, gender and sexuality and then contextualize it to the specific case of fatherhood and marriage relations. Gender and Sexual Identity The western approach to sexual identities is based largely on Judeo-Christian religious doctrines. In the 19th century, the power to control sexual identities shifted from the religious authorities to the medical communities that related sexual identities to biological essentialism (Dreger, 1998; Herdt, 1996). The biological approach to sexual identities was primarily based on the Darwinist binary notion of heterosexuality that was considered to be the teleological form of evolution to the highest form. Even though feminist psychology broadly follows the positivist approach to the human mind, many feminists have questioned this approach that emphasizes laboratory research and “mystification of scientific expertise” by incorporating social science research (Gergen and Davis, 1997). The liberal humanist attitude proposes a unique nature of human kind, disregarding differences in color, class, creed and gender as a result of which there is a “personalisation of the politics” (Kitzinger, 1987, cited in Gergen and Davis, 1997). Modern sociological theories of sexual identity have grown into debates on nature/ nurture, biological/ culture, essentialism/ constructivism and so on which have not always been resolved (Fausto-Sterling, 2000). Even modern study of science has been colored by the human practices and relations hence the biological versus sociological approach cannot be exclusive of each other. Therefore, the surgeon’s genital correction of infants or the attempt to study the differences between males and females in terms of the structure of the brain or studying the role of sex hormones in various organs of the body are essentially directed by the sociological notions of sexual identities (Fausto-Sterling, 2000). Social learning plays as important a role in sexual development as biological factors do hence the two cannot be considered separately. In the poststructuralist theory, study of cultural interpretations of embodiment and sexual identity focuses on gender and gender relations, including the dynamics and of social transformation processes, ways such changes are used and for what reasons. Michel Foucault (1978) studied the gender identities motivating the social practices and cultural products shaping daily lives in various societies. By stressing that the body and sexuality are cultural concepts rather than natural occurrences, Foucault paves the way for a feminist analysis of essentialism. He shows that rather than an intuitive, biological approach, sexuality is in a state of vibrant development that is neither programmed nor totally open to intended options. Instead, sexuality is “organized by power in its grip on bodies and their materiality, their forces, energies, sensations and pleasures” (Foucault, 1978, p 155). And, in fact, in Foucault’s theory, bodies, too, are subject to changes, rather than being prearranged (Shildrick, 2004). Foucault links the importance assumed by norms in modern society to the development of the human or social sciences. He explains that bio-power is closely associated with the sociological discussions on sex and sexuality that grew during the 18th and 19th century. These discourses, he stresses, tended to propose sex as a biologically characteristic that affected social manners of individuals. The belief that the sexual force could work in a standard, healthy way or could be distorted and tainted into abnormal forms leading to a scheme of categorization of manners according to normal and pathological sexual nature (Dreyfus & Rabinow, 1982, p 173). However, feminist critics of Foucault like Nancy Hartsock (1990, p 171-2) contended that a Foucauldian argument of power relations and reduction of individuals to passive bodies do not explain how resistance to such embodiments originated. Feminists have rejected Foucault's idea of fixed, steady or acceptable identities and emphasized on “to some essential, liberatory subject rooted in "women's experience" (or nature), as the starting point for emancipatory theory” (Sawicki 1994, p 289). Other feminists have found in Foucault's hypothesis of identity the option to politicize the methods through which conventional forms of masculine and feminine identity are created. According to Butler (1990, p33), gender identity is merely “a set of recurring acts” within an authoritarian frame thickening over time to create the look of body, of “a natural sort of being” (Butler 1990, p 33). The stereotypes of gender identity are evident in all spheres of socialization. For example, Mennesson (1980) found by interviewing 14 male professional jazz and ballet dancers that the activity of dance is gender related and the “feminist” males have to fight the stigmatized roles of being branded homosexual. Besides, the study also found two contradictory identities on the part of the men: those who wanted to be identified as men and those who wanted to be identified in both their masculine and feminine roles. Gender and fatherhood Families are typically organized around gender, which determines the roles and responsibilities of individuals in personal relationships. Not only do individuals respond to the gender-based roles, gender also influence relationships including intimate relationships. For example, in the Fordist society of the late 19th century, as employment shifted from the farm to the factory and paid work became dissociated from non-paid work, men were looked upon as the primary bread-earners and women as primary carers. A reversal of roles or a merging of the same was not always taken too kindly. Men were considered to be more suited for employment outside the house and their role in caring became limited. The “normal family processes” and the childcare responsibilities in the separate sphere ideology received theoretical support from sociologists and psychiatrists of the 1950s (Walsh, 2003). Although the separate sphere ideologies have been more in terms of culture than in reality, as many women, particularly from the lower socioeconomic strata, were in the workforce even during the Fordist heydays, gender inequalities in intimate relationships like marriage have been evident. While power within the family is rested mostly on the men, their personal interests and career often get prioritized over care roles. As a result, there is lesser expectations from the men on matters of family chores and responsibilities, particularly that of parenting. As more time is available for the man’s leisure and discretionary spending, he has to make less emotional investment in the marriage relationship. Hence, from a position of restricted power, the woman has more responsibility for parenting and housework. Gender also affects parenting behavior as parents typically teach “appropriate” and “inappropriate” behavior for each gender, behave and interact differently with the child depending on the gender (Walsh, 2003). In the post-Fordist world, as more and more women enter the workforce and become more assertive in the men’s arena of the professional world, they face a dilemma in the context of their relationships. This is because behavioral patterns of men and women continue to be gendered. In the public sphere, they are expected to be assertive with less visibility of their passion, since the latter is not considered to be a man’s virtue. Yet, in the private sphere, women are expected to demonstrate passion for caring and relationships. Gilligan (1990, cited in Eurich-Rascoe and Vande Kemp, 1997) contended that girls typically face a silencing at adolescence at home, identities, relationships and in career choices, women at later life face a higher stress as returning home to the hearth to assume predetermined roles as caregivers. The gender dichotomy is evident in the discourses of parenting which almost entirely leaves out the father from the carer role. Most research on child development process considers the role of the mothers and leaves out fathers from discourses (Pruett, 1998). Father-related research that has been undertaken does not seem to have much relevance in matters of child development. This has resulted in a gender-biased child development model in which mothers are the key to child development and ignores the role of fathers. Empirical research has also shown that with more women in childbearing age in the workforce, men have assumed a greater role in parenting. However, men’s engagement in children’s caregiving and play has been less than half of that by women (Pruett, 1998). This is despite that fact that fathers are as important as day care centers in the parenting process for employed mothers. Even in countries that adopted the welfare state model of development in the 1950s, “social motherhood” was adopted as a role for the state in which women were assigned the role of the mothers who gave birth and cared for a society at large. Even as childcare policies changed in these countries allowing for more women to work outside the home, motherhood was taken as a work quite like a profession. Yet, typically, it is the women who are mostly entrusted with parenting as 90 percent of stay at home mothers are women. However, as more women entered the workforce, the concept of fatherhood has also changed. Men are now expected to make room for women to enter the social space, which is thought to be a social responsibility, they are also expected to participate in parenting, which, however, is a personal engagement (Vuori, 2003). As sharing in housework is considered to be less important than in developing parent-child relationship, the stress is less on reducing the burden from the mother than on building father-child relationship, which has an effect on marriage relationships. In this sense, there is a dichotomy between the father building a close relationship with the child and the father’s role in the division of household labor (Vuori, 2003). Typically, attachment theory is taken as the key to child development but in most psychological research, this relates to the primary caregiver, that is, the mother even though it has been found that infants do not demonstrate any difference in terms of attachment. Also, parents have been found to be equally responsive to childcare needs. For example, both fathers and mothers have been found to be as anxious about leaving infants at the daycare centers and fathers are equivalent to mothers in identifying their children when blindfolded. Although mothers are typically more sensitive to children’s needs, fathers who assume the role of primary caregiver also demonstrate similar sensitivities (Pruett, 1988). The marriage relationship and the bonding between partners also play a major role in fatherhood roles as the quality of father-child interaction is found to be highly correlated with the strength of marital relationship. McVeigh et al (2005) found by a survey of 165 fathers in Australia over a period of 6 weeks after birth that most fathers took part in household work rather than in childcare and continued to work outside the house. Henwood and Procter (2003) found that even as new fatherhood typically entailed transformation of family values, there is a combination of optimism and resistance in terms of gender order. Men are more involved in parenting and are not detached from family life as they were a few decades ago but some areas of tension continue to exist. There is a contradiction in the father’s role as the provider for the cash or the care as also between valuing selflessness and autonomy in the context of care and while negotiating fairness and equity in the decision-making process. Since the last decade or so, the stay at the hospital after childbirth has been declining which calls for greater postnatal education for families. Typically, most research has focused on postnatal knowledge of women despite the fact that an increasing number of men are present at the time of childbirth. Men’s roles in fatherhood have been increasing with greater role of social policy aimed at fatherhood. However, even as more men now consider spending more time with their children than their fathers did with them, this related to older children with whom fathers could play. Fathers play a lesser role in the postnatal stage as they find the early roles of fatherhood stressful and disappointing. This is a result of a dissociation between the fathers’ identification of being a “new man” with insufficient education on postnatal childcare (McKellar, 2008). Gender relations are not only important for the quality of parenting but also for marriage relationships. For example, Feldman (2000) found that the father’s role in childcare has differential effects on parent-child as well as partner relationships. Each parent’s role in household chores and childcare determine parent-infant relationship and marital convergence depends on marital satisfaction as well as parenting roles. Most family research has identified the need to study the family composed of subsystems like marital, parenting and siblings. Balanced families are determined by strong subsystems in terms of marital, parental and sibling subsystems. While the relationships within the family therefore depend on the three dyads, conflict in one sub-system spills over to the other. Hence, not only does marital conflict affect parental relationships, the vice versa, that is, the effect of parental conflict on marital relationships, is also true (Devore, 2006). Effect of parenting stress on marital relationships has been found by researchers. Lavee et al (1996) found that parenting stress is dependent on number and age of children, economic status, mother’s employment and household division of labor. Child conduct problems also influence marital conflict resolution style of parents. Both parents’ critical parenting and low responsivity to parenting issues are seen to be directly related to negative marital conflict management style (Webster-Stratton and Hammond, 1999). There is little research on the effect of childbirth on marital bond. However, transition to parenthood may lead to crisis in family life and even to husband-wife relationships crisis. Quality of fatherhood in terms of presence at childbirth and involvement in pre and postnatal care has an effect on the marital relationship as much as it does on parent-child relationship (Robson and Mandel, 1985). Conclusion Thus, the concepts of fatherhood and parenting are gendered and not necessarily a sexual demarcation. The traditional idea of fatherhood was based on biological identities that were marked not only by the external markers but also sociological attitudes of gender. In societies that comprise of men as the primary bread-earners and women as caregivers, mostly staying at home, the household division of labor determines the attitude of parenting. While fatherhood is considered to be limited to providing cash and play with older children, motherhood bears the burden of post natal and early childhood care. In the poststructuralist view of the family as well as in the psychiatric approach, such gendered view of parenting has a negative effect on both parenting as well as marital relationships. Works Cited Butler, J. (1990) Gender Trouble: Feminism and the Subversion of Identity, NY: Routledge Devore, D (2006). New Developments in Parent-Child Relations, A1 Books Dreger, A.D. (1998). Hermaphrodites and the medical invention of sex. Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press. Dreyfus, H. and Rabinow, P. (1982) Michel Foucault: Beyond Structuralism and Hermeneutics, Sussex: The Harvester Press Foucault, M (1978) History of Sexuality, translated by R. Hurley, Penguin Books Fausto-Sterling, A (2000) Sexing the Body: Gender Politics and the Construction of Sexuality. New York: Basic Books Feldman, R (2000). 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