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Major League Baseball’s Antitrust Exemption: Draft Review Question I think the exemption should stand today because it is not harming anything and without it, the league would be greatly affected”Question 2The paper will argue that the Major League Baseballs antitrust exemption should be upheld Question 3The draft has answered all the required questions. However, the paper does not present a clear synthesis of the decision held by the Court of Appeal and Supreme Court. Additionally, the draft is not well structured to allow a reader to identify the arguments of the writer.
A reader cannot tell where the writer starts off with the analysis presented in the paper. Out of 5, the writer scores 3Question 4The central idea of the draft is that Major League Baseball should continue to have antitrust exemption. Because the antitrust exemption is a contentious issue that has attracted distinct opinions, it ought to be discussed thoroughly. However, the writer offers counter arguments in some of the points presented, deviating from the thesis and making a reader question the writer’s standpoint.
Out of 5, the writer scores 3Question 5The paper is not properly organized. Some of the claims wander and do not connect to the thesis. At the end of the paper, it is hard to tell the primary idea that the writer wants the reader to understand. The points seem to conflict the main argument of the paper. Additionally, there is no smooth flow from one point to the other and the transition from one sentence to the other is not effective.RecommendationsThe thesis should be clearer and indicate the standpoint of the writer regarding the topic.
Although the paper is engaging, it is not organized to allow a smooth flow of the writer’s arguments. To make the flow of the paper smooth, the writer can divide the paper into sections such as introduction, background of the case, analysis and conclusion.Part IIQuestion 6The writer supports the main point with statistics and examples. However, the source of the statistics and examples is not given and, therefore, such information cannot be authenticated. Question 7The main claims do not fully support the thesis without going outside of it.
In the third last paragraph, the writer presents a point to support the thesis, but annuls it with a counter proclamation that makes the claim pointless. This depicts a deviation from the thesis statement that seeks only to support why the Major League Baseballs antitrust exemption should be upheld. The main points need to be adjusted to match with the thesis. Out of 5, the writer scores 3Question 8The paper has a succinct conclusion, but fails to summarize the main points in the paper. The conclusion scores 4.
Part IIIQuestion 9I choose paragraph five, the paragraph has one key point. The key point is that the Major League Baseball is not anticompetitive and, therefore, the antitrust exemption should be upheld. Question 10 a. Effective Transition from the preceding paragraph – Nob. Effective transition to the next paragraph – Noc. Appropriate documentation and sources – Nod. Sentence Structure – Yese. Writing clear, direct and concise – Yesf. Grammar, Punctuation, Spelling - No
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