Families and Friends as the Most Essential People in an Individuals Life - Essay Example

Friends Vs Family Families and friends are the most essential people in an individual’s life. Family provides support, love and friendship when one is born; they welcome one to the world, nurture, teach and continue to provide support for them throughout their lives. Friends on the other hand, are people one meets on their own terms mostly from our neighbourhoods schools or jobs and as one goes through life, they are bound to make and lose many of these. This gives credence to the adage that while on can choose their friends, family is predetermined for them. The argument on which of the two groups is more important in one’s life is controversial and given the diversity in the ways people relate to each other in either case, it is unlikely to have an objective resolution. This paper contends that while it cannot be established which is the superior bond, family bonds and friendly ones are just as profoundly different as they are similar. The most apparent difference is the fact that a family is connected by blood while friendships are based on mutual affection and shared interests. When people hold reunions with their friends they host those they like and enjoy spending time with. However when there is a family get together, there will be various people; many whom may have little in common in forms of shared experience, shared interests or even affection. One’s family does not cease to be family because of personal differences and although people may become less close as friends with family members and fall out, the biological ties will always remain. The other difference, which is positive for a family is that owing to the absence of choice and permanence of the relationship, its members can have discussion that is more open and can disclose frustrations and problems easily. Therefore, conflict between family members can be unearthed and resolved since there is no fear of terminating the relationship that exists. Friends on the other hand, may sometimes be reluctant to approach problems openly especially with each other, often preferring to tolerate the issue for the sake of friendship (Wells, n.d.). The fact that friendships can be terminated makes them more fragile and as such, they require more effort to maintain than family bonds. For example, if one does not see their high school best friend for two years, it is likely they will have moved on and made other “best friends” in college. Conversely, no matter how long one or far away one stays from their sibling and family, they will not get another one and the closeness will remain intact. Despite the differences, the two relationships are profoundly similar in several respects, this is especially because they often overlap with family members being friends and sometimes friends becoming like family. They both provide a support framework that props an individual in their personal and professional life (Tischler, 2007). A family provides one with background, cultural and ethnic attributes that they acquire from their upbringing and immediate environment. On the other hand, friends influence one by shaping their character, informing their decisions and either directly or indirectly encouraging or discouraging various actions and decisions. There is a saying “show me your friends and I will show you the kind of person you are,” while this may not be completely accurate, it reflects the influence friends have on a person’s life. Some people will choose to go to a certain college because their friends are there claiming it is cool and others will seek advice from them. In addition, one’s network is instrumental in developing their career, and is often made up of friends who alert each other of opportunities and assist each other by availing the resource and networks around them to their friends (Scott & Carrington, 2011). Furthermore, as aforementioned these relationships overlap, as most people have very close friendships with family members, which explain why the strength of relationships between family members is not uniform. A person may be closer to their brother than their sister or cousin as the case may be; ultimately, the people one shares interest and mutual affection for each other will end up becoming their friends with the blood bond only making the friendship even stronger. Friends and family are also the people with whom most leisure time is spent with, during work hours, people often cannot choose whom they interact with such as colleagues or clients. However, when taking a vacation, or enjoying their free time, they will often do so with either of the two based on the particular situations (Tischler, 2007). For example after work most people will want to go out and have a drink with their friends or perhaps spend a weekend playing golf or fishing with them. On the other hand, they will spend holidays with their families and of course most evenings, and will conclude their day with their immediate family mostly spouse and children. People tend to share their happiness or sadness with friends and/or family since strangers and acquaintances may not be close enough to comprehend what a given situation means to someone. For example, when one is bereaved or celebrating a wedding anniversary they will want those close to them from both groups to be around so they can mourn or rejoice together. In conclusion, these two relationships are as different as they are similar, and to some people, family is not nearly as important as friends are since they may not always be there for you irrespective of the shared blood. They value friendship more since one gets to pick the people they get along with; however, there are many more who hold an opposite opinion claiming that family will always love you more than friends can and they do it unconditionally. Both stances have their own merit and as aforementioned, they cannot be resolved in light of the different relationships. The conclusion is that both relationships are important for the holistic personal and professional growth of an individual. Without a family, one runs the risk of developing poor social, cultural and interpersonal skills, which will negatively affect their lives. Similarly, without friends, personal and professional networks are severely limited, as one will miss important connections, which would otherwise bolster their personal or professional growth. References Tischler, N. 2007. Thematic guide to biblical literature: friends and family. Westport, Conn.: Greenwood Press. Scott, J., & Carrington, P. J. (Eds.). 2011. The SAGE handbook of social network analysis. Thousand Oaks, California: SAGE publications. Wells, E. n.d. Differences Between Friendship & Family Relationships in Interpersonal Communication. Global Post. 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